a new era of me

~adaline rosewood~

My mother passed away when I was nine, I was the one that found her which fucked with my head a lot.  It's all my father's fault really.  He practically pushed her to her suicide.  I don't blame my mother, I'd do the same if I lived with a man who I'm supposed to love, who was so consumed by his work that he pushed away his wife and daughter to the point he drove himself to utter madness. I miss her. I wish she could've taken me along with her.. Or I wish it had been my father who had killed himself. If i'm honest with myself I sometimes hate her for doing it, I feel shitty about it.

He even tried to kill me at one point, which wasn't the first time he had tried to harm me.  He once thought I was.. I can't even seem to recall the word but he almost pushed a knife straight through me when I was ten, leaving me with a scar near my waist.  I remember begging merlin and the muggle god to take me away, even to death, just so I could escape the place I was supposed to call 'home'. I needed my mother. I really needed her.

After that I can recall the vivid memory of my father packing his bags and leaving.  I'm not sure where he went, What he did, or if he's even alive now, I genuinely hope that man that I'm supposed to call my father is dead. Things began to become difficult, the food supply began to get low.. And lower.. Till there was nothing left.  I rationed and rationed and yet that still didn't seem to help me out one bit.  My entertainment had been my mother's repertoire of words, which had led to me learning many words.  It had also made me feel a little closer to my mother.. I felt a little happy despite the horrible circumstances.

I remember one day waking up in a girls home absolutely lost out of my mind.  I hadn't spoken to anyone and I was absolutely confused on when and how I had gotten there.  I would get made fun of a lot for being rather quiet. But I was and had always been a quiet kid.  No one spoke to me and I spoke to no one, but I was fine with having no one to communicate with because talking was never my strong suit. I got picked on quite a lot in that girls home, it fucking sucked. But I made a friend so everything was going good. Shit hit the fan when they found out my mother killed herself, that 'friend' told everyone. I wanted to die right then and there. I became quieter and stuck to myself, I couldn't handle the shit I was going through and that was until I got a letter. On my 11th birthday, my golden birthday too, august 11th. I never receive mail, ever. This was where a part of my life changed.

My first year of hogwarts I had been sorted into Ravenclaw and I was alone for a long while. It truly sucked.

In my second year of hogwarts i met a girl named Luna Lovegood. We became best friends. I think that was one of the best days of my life. I was still quiet, I hardly spoke but she understood. And never judged me.

In my third year I met Percy Hawthorne through Luna, we became a small trio. I felt so happy it was great, I deserved this. All of this. I gained a small crush on Percy and Luna knew, It was quite funny.

In my fourth year I was still quiet but Percy and I had gotten into a relationship, My first ever relationship. Thanks to my wing woman Luna, Everything was working out for me.

That was until my seventh year, a lot of things changed since then.  I changed, some would say for the better..  And some would say for the worse.  I couldn't care less about what these sloppy mother fuckers thought, I felt way more happy.  That was all that mattered then.

— i love her already but how do you all feel about this ? - B —