I Called You Mine

My love won't go to waste

Riley's POV

Tuesday, November seventh, two thousand twenty four, at three fifty seven A.M. marks fourteen years of my existence. My family isn't doing much today, because stepdad has left for some business in Nashville. We're still doing something, mom will have pancakes ready for me at breakfast, we'll cut up an ice cream cake from Coldstone Creamery after dinner. I can tell that Blake is putting too much effort into my birthday when she shows up to the bus stop with a rose. I'm not sure how I feel about the romantic gesture, I've just never really liked how roses die or the way they smell. Loving someone sometimes means lying, so I tell her I love it and kiss her on the cheek. I watch her face light up and immediately know she needed that.

"I was worried you wouldn't like it" Blake says. I want to agree with this statement but even in my head I can't tell how that would be perceived.

"The flower is going to die fast without water" I say.

"I stole the flower from my neighbor's garden. It lasted until November, it will be fine going without water for a few hours." Blake says. I don't know why, but we laugh at that. I twirl the flower around in my hand with newfound love for it. Its hardiness kind of reminds me of Blake, and yes, Blake is standing right next to me, but the reminder is comforting.

"I don't feel like I say I love you enough" I say

"That's fine" Blake says, "words are a lot harder than gestures"

Those words have fallen out of her mouth before she was my girlfriend, but they make me love her even more. I want to kiss her one more time, but Emma is approaching the bus stop and we're not that comfortable with public kissing.

The school day seems to fly past me as I stare at the rose in my backpack. I miss some of what the teachers say but my intelligence keeps me afloat. This is what I was doing when Ms. Lucas asks about the rose. I usually like her butting into people's business but I hate having the eyes of my entire class of fifteen on me. A small class, I know, but it's still too many eyes. I focus on Blake's eyes and try to decipher if she wants me to broadcast our relationship. If I do, it will be the center of attention since Rocco and Lucy are no more. If I don't, Blake might not shower me with love the way I'm craving for her to now.

"It was a birthday gift" I say

Ms Lucas gushes about how I have someone special and secret. Then she asks for names. Everyone loves getting derailed from having to read The Outsiders so I just let everyone start throwing out names because I know they'll be wrong.

"Do we know them?" Ms Lucas says

"Yes"

"Is it a boy?" She asks, "I don't judge"

"No" I say. In response, Rocco begins screaming about how gay I am.

"Which class is she in?" I hesitate on answering this, because if I say that she's in this class then there's only three options. Blake, Emma, and Saniyah. They've backed me into a corner, but eventually they'll stop bothering me. I don't answer them and endure the harassment. At least we don't have to popcorn read The Outsiders now.

At the end of class, Rocco comes up to me with a chart of people he thinks are most likely to be my girlfriend. Ms Lucas tells him to stop being so creepy. Blake wasn't that high on the list, Emma came first, then Lucy. I found Lucy being in second place strange considering that she's Rocco's ex, but I don't verbally question his rankings. Blake came in seventh of the eleven girls Rocco named. How he came up with the names of eleven girls when he has never touched grass in his life I will never know.

By dismissal, everyone has forgotten about who they think my girlfriend is. I can tell Blake is relived that people aren't bothering me, and by extension her, to get the details of something that they don't need to know about. I don't understand why they are drawn to middle school relationships, they're so short lived and dramatic. I get off the bus and start running home because Mom needs to get the ice cream cake and run some errands without Izzy. This means I have to wrangle my little sister for two hours, or I could just put her down for a nap and promise her candy if she doesn't tell mom she took a nap. She's not supposed to have naps anymore, but just once can't hurt, right?