Damian Wayne Oneshots

Lost in La La Land

(Sorry it's been forever. My writing is just so bland! I'm getting old at this.)

TW this chapter contains self harm! ⚠️

If triggered easily, I suggest you don't read

As always. I don't encourage acts of self harm, but instead wary you try it.

I love you when you smile 💫 :)

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"I don't get your obsession, Damian." Respawn scowled, dropping yet another vape on his half brothers lap.

"Don't judge before you try it." Damian countered.

"I'm not trying that shit. Between the two of us, I actually value my lungs" Respawn narrows his eyes. 

"You're terrible. God is shaking his very head on you right now. Just know that, you fool."

"Why don't you just take a sip? If you don't like it, then you don't have to try it again." Damian handed it back to him.

Respawn held it, staring at it. 

Was this peer pressure?

He took one look at Damians eyes- then back at the vape.

Fuck it, he thought.

Respawn took a sip, and oddly he never coughed up smoke like Damian had with his first try. He seemed good at taking it. Experianced almost.

"Never doing that again" Respawn tossed it back with disgust.

Damian caught it, with a muse look on his face. "Mint's not your flavour?"

 "Vape's not my thing." Respawn sneered with a disappointed look.

"I don't remember you ever making faces those detailed. You don't seem so alien anymore." Damian pointed out, with another sip.

Respawn leaned on the ledge.

"Probabbly because you were too busy trying to lift the world on those narrow shoulders of yours, then to pay me attention." He replied, his tone less stern now. "Tell me Damian, Mr. Life is a waste."

"It's exhausting, isn't it? Pretending everything's fine while drowning in the chaos? Do you still have dreams? They turn out fine, yet next thing your bottling it up and 'spilling' the blood on your wrists."

"Am I that predictable?" Damian smiled, an unsettling smile..

Deep.

"I sometimes wonder why I even bother. No amount of talking or begging will get you to stop- being angry, I don't know what your angry at, but I get it. It's hard to let go."

Damian looked away, his gaze drifting toward the horizon, where the darkening sky met the city's skyline. "Hard? I never ask for your pity-"

"I'm not pitying you— maybe I'm fucking concerned!" Respawn shot back, the irritation lacing his voice barely masking an undercurrent of said worry.

With zero reply from his half brother his tone became more aggitated.

"You think I want to see you go down that path? Every time you take a sip, it's like watching you slip away little by little. Too busy in La la land, Wake the fuck up and deal with life!"

"-Clearly," said Damian, taking a long drag, before looking his brother in the eye.

"I'm not the only one slipping, then," Damian snapped, audacity flaring. "You've got your own demons, and the last time I checked, your hands weren't exactly clean."

Respawn's face hardened at the accusation. "I've worked on it. I can say I tried." he said quietly, anyone looking sideways coukd see the tension between them thickening. "But it's not about me—this is about you. Aren't you tired of all these talks? Of worrying people who care?"

Damian's eyes flickered. The fight slowly drifted from him, back to La La land as reality settled in. 

"Maybe. But that doesn't mean I'll just stop this thing. That's not how it works. We both know that."

"Then what?" Respawn pressed, taking a step closer to his brother, lowering his voice. "You keep pushing me away, pushing everyone away— saying 'I'm fine Nika', or 'it's just a habit, Connor'. 'I'm great Jason'." 

"What's left when everything you rely on turns to ash? When I decide to just- stop caring about you? I'm considering it, you thick headed moron."

For a moment, silence enveloped them. A gloomy silence. The city sounds faded into a dull murmur as they stood on their shared refuge. Respawn had a feeling Damian wouldn't quit, so what was the point?

"I don't know, alright?" Damian finally replied, the fight gone from his voice. "I thought I could handle it myself. I thought a few puffs could clear my head-"

"Talking, clears your head. Vaping makes you go loopy. There's a difference. You seek out comfort, you get it." Respawn shot quickly.

Damian looked back at him, nothing to say. Shame.

That shame was currently overtaking the bravado from his voice. "I hate feeling weak. I hate needing someone. This...was so much essier"

"And yet, here we are," Respawn said, a hint of a smile ghosting his lips. "Two idiots on a rooftop, avoiding the inevitable."

Damian let out a bitter laugh, shaking his head. It wasn't real, but it cleared some tension. 

"You've taken after Jason. Dramatics."

"Call it what you want. I just want you to- finally promise me that if you're feeling like you just might cut it, or take a puff- you'll talk to me. Don't shut me out. Give me a call, make some plan. To just...do something."

"I can't just stop out" Damian murmured, Respawn glared down at him. A threatening look of 'Go on' evident in his eyes. Damin reconsidered.

"But I will try."

"That's all I'm asking for" Respawn said, reaching out to clasp Damian's shoulder, anchoring him to the moment. "Don't let the darkness swallow you whole."

Damian paused, he didn't take that sip this time.

He stared down at the world below him, someday that vision might begin fading from view. All he'll see is Red and La La Land if he doesn't twke it to heart.

Damiam nodded slowly, uncertainty still etched across his features, but beneath that uncertainty, he was going to try.

Didn't want to be called dramatic yet again. He will stop. He will.

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I wasn't gonna write today but I told myself JUST DO IT.

I did it. I hope I stop procrasinating someday.