War of Love

Chapter 19 - Problems

I awoke with a groan, my head was spinning and my vision hazy.
"Oh my goodness" I curse under my breath as I try to sit upright in bed.
   Yeah, that's right. I'd been discharged since two days ago, but I'm still on bed rest. For a few days though.
"You okay?" I heard a deep voice ask softly from my side. I look up, eyes locking with a pair of blue ones. I recognised the voice as well as those eyes. If you already knew, then yes, it was Ethan.
There was so much concern in his eyes, that for a moment I nearly thought the headache I had was messing with my thoughts and vision.
But, it wasn't.
"Uh..." I stutter, not sure what to say. Well, ever since Ethan got me discharged from the hospital; he'd been a very caring and supportive friend. He stopped by after lectures to make sure I was okay, and he didn't let me miss out in my studies. He always gave me feed back, and even offered to help me complete my notes until I recovered.
  Really, I'm grateful to stumble upon a friend like him.
Right now, he was currently with me in my bedroom in my little apartment. But he didn't seem to bother about it, which I must say; took me by surprise.
I blink, snapping out of my train of thoughts. Only to meet his expectant eyes, "yeah; I am." I say softly, voice hoarse.
He gets up stiffly, before going over to the table by my bed stand. I don't really pay attention to what he grabs unto, still obviously busy rubbing my temple from the massive head ache I had.
But there is the sound of leather, and when I turn to see what he's up to... my breath gets caught in my throat.
His gaze was still fixated on the medicines in his hands, and I couldn't bring myself to move. I clench my fist as my heart hammers in my chest, and I swear. I nearly died when he finally met my gaze, no. I wished I was currently buried six feet under.
      He crouches slowly by my side wordlessly, and I can't help but flinch back a little. He held my gaze for a few more toucherous seconds before he finally spoke.
"You didn't tell me," he says softly, and I could have sworn his voice broke. I tear my eyes from his, and stare down at my hands. "It wasn't necessary." I rasp softly, my throat tight.
"Really?" He asks, voice mildly high as he gets to his feet. Towering over me.
"You have anxiety issues and suffer from panic attacks Lyria, it's more than necessary." He says, running a hand through his silver hair in annoyance.
My hands ball into fists, as I grit my teeth to control my trembling body and hands with my eyes shut. "When you put it like that, you make it sound like its a bad thing." I say, voice breaking as I open my eyes, he doesn't think twice before saying what he does next.
"Well, it is." He says, and the moments he let's it slip, his eyes widen like as though he had realized his mistake. But it was too late. "You don't know me or what I've been through." I say, and before I can help it tears are streaming down my face while I keep my eyes trained on the tiled floor.
It's silent.
He doesn't speak and neither do I. Finally after it felt like forever, I heard him inhale sharply.
I don't look up, so I don't realize when he squats and grabs both my hands in his.
Gently.
"I'm sorry" He says softly, and it only makes me cry harder for some reason. "I didn't realize that it's your life, and it is your choice to tell me about it or not." He says , voice softer and more solemn than before.
After a while, he places a hand under my chin, and lifts my face slightly until my eyes find his.
"Will you forgive me?" He asks me, eyes pleading. I slowly release my chin and turn away, trying to think straight.
A few minutes pass by, before I eventually speak. "I forgive you."
And when I turn to look back at him, he let's out a breath I hadn't realize he had been holding. Shoulders slumping in relief.
I slowly pull back, releasing my hands from his hold. He slowly gets to his feet, and walks towards the window. After some moments of silence, he finally breaks the ice.
"You wanna talk about it?"
I freeze, the question catching me by surprise. I blink, completely sure that I didn't hear him right. Why on earth would he want to listen to my problems?
Of all people, me?
I whip my head in his direction, pretty sure I was looking startled.
"Pardon?" I ask in disbelief, he tears his gaze from the window and turns to me.
"You heard me." He says giving me a blank look.
Oh
Yeah I did, I did want to talk about it, but where do I begin?
"It's okay" he says, taking a seat near the window while his eyes never left me.
I swallowed, "its not the kind of story you'll love to hear" I say, staring down at my hands. It was getting difficult to breathe now.
"I want to hear it." He says, leaning forward. The moment I lock eyes with him, he gives me a reassuring look that has me opening up.
But it isn't easy.
"My family, hates me." I begin, he holds his breath. Whatever he thought about that statement, I couldn't really tell. The look on his face remained blank.
I take his silence as an encouragement to continue, and so I do.
"They never really treated me as one of them. Both my older siblings weren't making it easier, and to top it all off. No one, ever corrected my younger one whenever she hurt me." It was silent.
"You mean.. Layla?" He asks, surprised.
I nod, "to be honest, I've always been alone because of her. She and her friends, May, and the others. They don't miss a chance to pick on me or make my life hell. That's why I wasn't surprised when she did that, I was expecting far worse actually." I finish, voice numb of emotions. He stares at me for a while, seeing the question in his eyes I decide to answer them.
"She hates me, or perhaps even worse." I say shaking my head, "and she can do anything, to get me out of her life." I say with an exhausted smile.
He lets out an exhausted sigh, after much silence. Shaking his head in disbelief.
"I can't believe what I'm hearing." He says voice filled with bewilderment, "because she's your girlfriend?" I ask him arcing a brow, to which he doesn't answer.
I place a palm under my chin, while I carefully observed him. " You know, I'm kinda surprised she hasn't left you yet." I add, at that he visibly freezes. Then snapping his eyes to mine, he suddenly asks: "what do you mean?". I let out an amused huff, "She never stays with a boy longer than a month or two. If she's still with you, then you have something she wants. She never really settled for less." I say with a shrug, feeling relieved at how light my chest felt.
"So you mean, I'm not her first?" He asks, voice surprisingly calm. I shake my head to affirm. 
After much tensed silence, he finally spoke again something in his voice shifting.
"You have anxiety issues because of her?" He asks me, voice slightly high. I blink, shaking my head.
"No, she was part of those who contributed to it. She's  not the main reason." I say after much thought, more solemn than before. And I could have sworn, Ethan tensed at my reply.
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