Minha's Shahmeer

CHAPTER 32

Minha Ali
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"Allah, please show me a way out. Iam in desperate need of protection and security. My heart is heavy with worry and pain as I sit on my prayer mat, begging for your help. I do not know what else to do, for you are the only one who can save me. Keep me safe and secure from Shabbir's harm, for I fear for my well-being. Oh Allah, I cry to you with all my heart, please protect me and guide me towards a better path. Iam counting on your mercy and power to shield me from this danger. Ya Allah meri pareshaniya door kar, mujhe himmat aur taqat de. Meri duaon ko qubool kar, main tujh pe tawakkal karti hun. Apni rehmat se mujhe aise darinde se bacha. Ameen", I wipe my tears and stand up from the ground, clutching the prayer mat in my hand. It is around 7 PM, and I just finished offering my maghrib namaz.

My heart is heavy with worry and pain as I struggled to decide whether to tell Shahmeer about these calls and messages. How will he react?

What if he starts to hate me? I can't bare the thought of someone I like harboring hatred towards me.

I walk over to the dressing table, place the prayer mat down, and then return to the bed, sitting there with my knees pulled to my chest.

"Why are you doing this to me, Shabbir?", I cry out, a sob escaping my lips.

I desire to be with Shahmeer and to build a happy and peaceful life together. I envision having children and creating a small, joyful family in our home.

However, I fear that Shabbir will never allow me to find that happiness and peace with Shahmeer. In moments of frustration, I wish he dies.

I know that ammi would not approve these thoughts; she has always taught me to support and pray for others, rather than wish bad upon anyone.

Yet, Shabbir's actions are pushing me to the brink of hating myself for even thinking such things. Iam sorry, Allah. Please forgive me, and I promise to refrain from such thoughts in the future.

My thoughts were interrupted by the phone ringing again. Ugh, I shouted in frustration while pulling my hair.

"Kutte!", I yelled as I crawled to the end of the bed to grab my phone.

A sigh of relief escaped my lips when I saw Mishi's name pop up on the screen. I immediately swiped to answer the call.

"Assalamualaikum", she greeted me, her voice sounding happy.

I didn't want to ruin her mood or worry her about the calls, so I took a deep breath and forced a smile on my face, as If she could see me through the voice call.

"Walaikumassalam", I replied in a steady voice, surprised at how controlled I sound.

"Kaisi ho? Kya kar rahi thi? Mujhe bhool gayi ho na tum? Haan, humein kyun yaad rakhogi ab tum, Shahmeer jo mil gaya hai tumhe", she said, her tone playful, which made a small smile appear on my face.

"How can you say that, Mishi? Kya aapko aisa lagta hai ke main aapko bhool jaungi?", I questioned, noticing Shahmeer entering the room with a confused look on his face.

"Lag toh aise hi raha hai. Tumne mujhe call nahi ki, chaubees ghante hogaye hain. Mujhe tumhari yaad aa rahi thi, socha ke call kar lu", she said her voice filled with longing.

"I miss you too; mujhe bhi aapki yaad aa rahi thi. Accha kiya aapne call kiya", I replied, watching Shahmeer walk towards the bed and sit in front of me.

"Kya mila muh dikhayi mein?", Mishi asked as I can hear voices coming from beside her, I think she is sitting with every one. I quickly looked at Shahmeer at her question, to see him already staring at me, making me feel shy and self conscious.