Evermore :||: Nick & Charlie

Chapter 13: The Water's Getting Colder

Nick's POV

I feel a lot better after seeing Charlie last night. I do wish we could've stayed together longer, but the more I've spent time at Charlie's house, the more I understand why he and his mom don't get along.

She's just so strict with him and never gives him a chance to explain himself.

Just like last night.

She got angry, and yeah, it probably wasn't nice to walk in and see her son and his boyfriend kissing in the living room, but we weren't doing anything more than that.

We needed each other at that moment and all she did was explode.

He called me after a few hours.

We fell asleep on the phone together, something we hadn't done before, but we both needed that closeness from each other.

Last night was the first night in days that I've gotten any sort of sleep.

I do want to tell Charlie about my panic attacks, but at the same time, I'm not sure he's in the right headspace to hear about my problems.

I brush those thoughts aside as I start getting ready for school. Charlie had hung up the call before I woke up, which bummed me out a bit, but I understand. I pick up my phone and send him a quick text.

Nick: Are you coming to school today?

Nick: I love you ❤️

I lock my phone and head downstairs to grab breakfast. My aunt isn't really the cooking type, so I just make myself a bowl of cereal.

"Nick, sweety, I think we need to talk about what happened last night." I look up from my food. "I called your mom and-"

"You called her? Diane, I told you not to bother her with it." I say, feeling slightly angry that my request was ignored.

"I only told her because last night was really bad. I know you've been able to calm yourself down, but last night...you scared the hell out of me if I'm honest."

"I just started overthinking and couldn't stop." I say, looking back down at my food. She sits down next to me and rests her hand on my arm.

"You can talk to me. You don't have to deal with this all alone." Tears start forming in my eyes. I've been crying a lot these past few weeks.

"I'm so scared of losing him." My voice trembles.

"You and Charlie are so good for each other. I really don't think he's going anywhere." I look her in the eyes.

"That's not what I meant." I take a deep breath. "I'm scared that he'll hurt himself so badly that- he-" I can't get the words out, I don't want to ever get those words out.

"Oh, baby." She pulls me into a comforting hug. I hug her back, still feeling all of the raw emotions I was feeling last night.

Eventually, I stop crying and my aunt leaves for work. I grab my book bag and pull my phone out of my pocket to see a message from Charlie, making me smile.

Charlie: i love you too ❤️

I don't even care that he didn't answer my question, all that matters now is that he's finally talking to me again. I send him a heart before leaving my house.

When I get to school, I don't really talk to anyone and just head straight to class. It's not that I don't want to talk to people, I just don't really have anything to say if I'm honest.

I know that if I talk to the rugby lads, they'll ask where Charlie's been and I'll have to lie about it.

If I talk to Tao and Isaac, they'll ask about Charlie too and then bring up my panic attack at my birthday again, even though I've told them over and over to just drop it.