Charlie's POV
When I wake up in the morning, it feels like yesterday was a fluke or something. It feels like all the happiness that I was feeling has been completely sucked out of me, not to be dramatic or anything like that, but it's true.
Learning about Nick's panic attacks didn't really help either.
It's mostly the fact that he kept it from me, but also knowing that I'm most likely the reason for all of his stress. I know I promised him that I wouldn't blame myself, but it's hard to do that when I know it's the truth.
So today, I've decided to just pretend everything is fine with everyone.
No complaining to Nick about my problems, no ditching class to hang out in the art room, no crying.
Everything is fine.
I'm fine.
I walk out of my house with Tori and head to the bus stop. As we sit there waiting for the bus, I scroll on my phone.
"You didn't eat breakfast again." Tori says, breaking the silence between us. I take a breath before looking at her.
"Oh, yeah, I just wasn't hungry, that's all."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, Tori, I'm sure. Really, I'm okay. You don't need to worry about me all the time." I smile, trying my best to hide just how much my mind is constantly screaming that I'm a failure or worthless or-
"It's my job to worry." Her voice breaks me out of thought.
"Yeah, but you don't need to." The bus pulls up and I stand. "Everything is perfect." I get on the bus, Tori following behind. The rest of the bus ride is filled with silence between us. I listen as the kids around me are laughing, having a good time.
How do people have this much energy in the morning?
Let alone at all?
I get off the bus and watch as Tori walks across the street and over to Higgs. Turning back to Truham, I start walking to the gate only to be accosted by Harry throwing his arm around me.
"Oi, Charlie Spring! How's it been, mate?" He asks. I roll my eyes, already wanting this interaction to end. He's been far nicer to me ever since Nick came out, but that doesn't mean he's not still an annoying prick.
"It's been fine." I quietly say as we continue to walk, his arm still around my shoulder.
"Haven't seen you in a bit, where'd you run off to?"
"I was sick."
Please go away.
Please go away.
Please go away.
"Harry, lay off." I hear Christian say, pulling Harry off of me.
"What? I was only being nice." I continue to walk, not really wanting to put up with this today. Today is the day where everything has to be fine.
I have to be fine.
"Charlie, wait up!" I stop, turning around to see Christian coming up to me, Sai and Otis following close behind. "Sorry about Harry. He's just-"
"A prick?" I finish Christian's sentence, making all three of them laugh.
"Anyway, we wanted to make sure that you were okay. We haven't seen you at practice in a while and-"
"Oh, yeah. I'm fine. I've just been feeling kinda sick this last week. I'll be at practice today though."
"The team isn't really the same without everyone on it." Otis tells me, making me give them a small smile.
YOU ARE READING
Evermore :||: Nick & Charlie
RomanceCharlie likes to pretend everything is fine, happy, perfect, but now that his struggles are revealed to Nick, it's going to just get harder and harder to hide how he's feeling. He doesn't want to worry Nick, so it might be best to keep it to himself...
