ᴇx-ʙᴏʏʀꜰʀɪᴇɴᴅ, ɴᴇxᴛ ʜᴜꜱʙᴀɴᴅ

Chapter 25

Nishtha

I never thought I'd be here again. In this house, in his room. I had taken a promise not to step foot here and now here I am. After the rituals I don't know where Yuvaan went, I didn't care.
Are you sure?
I didn't.
I was sitting in the hall while Vamika was talking to me. I gave her very simple answers. I had made it clear to her that we can only talk when Yuvaan wasn't around - I don't want more pain.

"Nishu." Jaya Aunty said, "you go freshen up."
"What?" I'm confused. Shouldn't there be more rituals? "I'm done?"
She laughed, "Yeah beta, all done."
"Oh. Can I help in anything then?"
"Beta, you've been through enough now."
"I don't mind helping. I want to."
She chuckled, "Okay! I'm making dinner. You freshen up and then come help me. We can finish your rasoi rasam now only then."
"Okay!" I said.
"I'll get started. You know your way around the house so you go to your room and freshen up." She left and I stood up.

I reached the room that I had been to so many times. I was scared to even open the door. What if he's inside and he accuses me of crossing my limits? Or he'll get angry that I didn't ask him?
I sighed.
Slowly, I opened the door.
It was empty.
The whole room had changed. It looked mature.
I remembered his room being filled with his own football awards, his guitar and his pictures. Now, it was just grey and black.
His bed lay in the top left of the room, with two small side tables on either end. Next to it was the door to the balcony. He expanded the room as there was a door which led somewhere, which wasn't there before. I walked in and saw his study table, which had now become an entirely separate area, with a sliding door. He had made two new rooms in his one room. Smart.
I walked towards his walk-in closest. It was an L shaped one, which led to the bathroom. There was a dressing table, which I guess he used to get ready for interviews. His room was wow.

Thankfully, there wasn't much decoration or all those cliché roses and all. There were basic roses but those can be ignored. I removed my jewelry by sitting in front of the dresser and quickly went and took a shower. Then, I came out and wore a simple red and white saree. I had kept my sindoor and my mangalsutra on - I had to.

Packing my stuff bag into my bag, along with my jewelry, I kept the bags standing near the door and then went back down.
"Hi." I said, entering the kitchen.
"Oh good! You're here!" Aunty said, "Come!" She showed me around the kitchen.
"What should I make?" I asked.
"Anything you want to. We love your cooking."
"You... you decide."
"Hmm, how about kheer?"
"Okay."
"You know how to make it?"
"Yeah."
"Okay. I'll not disturb you then!"

She left the kitchen and I started making it. Cooking has always been therapeutic for me. I love to cook. Whether it's a bad day, a harsh day, a good day.... Cooking was a stress buster.
I immediately forgot everything and started to make the kheer. Within an hour, I was done.

"This food is delicious!" Uncle asked.
"Mom makes the best food!" Vamika said.
"Jaya made it? Not Nishtha?" Uncle asked.
I looked down. Was I supposed to? "I... I was... I thought..." I don't even have a defense.
"Nishtha! Relax! I'm not expecting you to make things from day 1. Come on!" Uncle said.
"Bohot stress leti hai tu!" Aunty added.
Everyone was at the table except one person. I am not surprised. Why would he be here?
"Nishtha, we will take you to your home after breakfast tomorrow, okay?"
"H...home?" Are they kicking me out already?
"For your pagphera beta!" Aunty said.
Oh. Right.
"Okay." I said, standing behind the table.
"Why are you standing? Come eat."
"I thought I..." I thought I'll wait for him.
"Beta... he said he has work. I don't know when he'll come back." Aunty said, disappointed.
Not surprised.
"Ah. I see. I... I'll eat then." I said, sitting down.
I ate in silence while they continued talking about whatever they were. I didn't listen.

My mind was a mess. He cheated on me a night before the wedding and now he's missing on the day of the wedding too. I'm sure he's with her. I can't even say anything to him because he'll hit me with the usual 'this is a contract wedding.'
I hate my fate.
I was about to cry.

I was cleaning the kitchen when I heard his voice enter. I saw Aunty and Uncle talk to him. I don't want to see him, or serve him food, or anything. "Jeena." I called the house help.
"Yes Didi."
"I'm going to sleep. If anyone asks, please just tell them that I had a headache and I slept."
"Okay, are you fine? Do you need medicine?"
I need something else, Jeena.  
"No. Don't worry."
"Didi, I don't want to pry but, it's been 4 years since we saw you and now you're married but you aren't talking to him. I know you haven't forgotten what happened that day, but..."
"Jeen. I promise I'll tell you everything later, I need sleep right now. I will talk to you."
"Okay Didi. Goodnight."
I smiled and excused myself.

I went upstairs while I hear them all talking downstairs. Run Nishtha, run.
When I reached his room, I started to fear all the things I would hear from him. I shouldn't sleep here. I won't sleep here.
I quickly grabbed my bag and made my way to the guest room - of course I know where it is.
I entered and quickly locked the room. I got changed into a simple salwar and kept my phone and my duppata on the side table and then lay down. Day one of marriage - this is how it goes.

I couldn't sleep. It had been almost 2 hours since I came in and I couldn't sleep. I had heard some knocking on my door but I ignored it, to keep the story that I have slept. I know that Aunty and Vamika both had come, but I didn't answer.
I can't even talk to Vamika.
What can I do in this house?
I can't talk to Vami, I'm not allowed to look at him, speak to him, get my hopes up with him, do anything related to him. I just have to treat this place as a hostel, where I get free food and a bed.
That's all this is.
Yes, I get some company.
But I don't want that.
I want to be alone.
How am I going to explain why I slept in guest room, on my own wedding night?
Time to find an excuse.
I don't need to give him an excuse, he wouldn't want me in his room anyway, and I won't enter his room until he wants me too. I don't want to.

Ugh.
I got up and started working. I don't want to get out of the room in case they were still awake or someone was walking around in any case. After working on my projects and the work given from IBM, which I started working on, I finally slept.

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