Mixed Up | Yeonbin

34. night talk

Soobin was outside again, cigarette in hand, sitting on the same old bench in the dormitory courtyard.

It had become his go-to spot whenever he needed to clear his head or just escape for a little while. The night air was cool, the only sound was the faint rustling of leaves and the occasional passing car.

His thoughts were elsewhere though, stuck on Yeonjun—how easily flustered he'd been these past few days.

It was cute, in a way. Every time Soobin tried to get a little closer, to bridge whatever gap still existed between them, Yeonjun seemed to back away.

Was it too fast? Soobin thought, taking a slow drag from his cigarette.

Maybe he's not ready for... whatever this is.

He exhaled, watching the smoke swirl and disappear into the night.

He didn't want to push Yeonjun away, but at the same time, it was getting harder to ignore how his feelings had shifted. What started as friendly care had morphed into something deeper, something more complicated. Something he wasn't sure Yeonjun even wanted.

Lost in thought, Soobin barely registered the slight shift of the bench under him until it was too late. He turned his head and froze for a second.

It was Yeonjun.

He'd sat down quietly, not saying a word at first, just staring out into the courtyard like it was the most natural thing in the world to sit next to Soobin at this late hour.

Soobin instinctively moved to put out his cigarette. He didn't want the smoke to bother Yeonjun, especially with how sensitive he seemed to everything lately.

But before he could, Yeonjun's hand gently stopped him.

"It's okay," Yeonjun said, his voice soft but steady. His eyes remained fixed forward, not meeting Soobin's gaze.

Soobin hesitated, but eventually relented, taking another slow drag before setting the cigarette down on the ashtray beside him. Silence settled between them, a thick, heavy pause.

Both of them had things they wanted to say, things they had been bottling up, but neither knew how to start. It was like they were waiting for the right moment, but no moment felt right.

The tension was hanging by a very light thread among the dark sky, a delicate balance of unspoken words hanging in the cool night air.

Suddenly, they both opened their mouths at the same time.

"So—"

"I was—"

They both stopped, then blinked at each other before laughing awkwardly. It was like a small crack in the wall that had been building between them, a crack that let in just enough light to make the moment a little less suffocating.

"You go first," Yeonjun said, his lips still curled in a soft smile. He looked at Soobin, waiting, genuinely curious about what he had to say.

Soobin hesitated again, feeling the weight of his words before they left his mouth. He bit his lip, feeling the nerves prickle in his chest.

"Am I making you uncomfortable lately?" Soobin asked, his voice quieter than usual. He didn't look at Yeonjun directly, afraid of the answer but knowing he had to ask. "I feel like... I don't know, every time I try to get close, you pull away. Did I do something wrong?"

The question hit Yeonjun like a punch to the gut. He hadn't expected that.

"I—" Yeonjun faltered, not sure what to say at first. He hadn't even realized how his actions had been affecting Soobin.

Sure, he'd been a little distant, but that was more because he was confused about his own feelings, not because Soobin had done anything wrong.

Yeonjun swallowed, gathering his thoughts before speaking again. "No... No, you didn't do anything wrong. It's not you."

"Then what is it?" Soobin's voice was soft, almost vulnerable. It was rare for him to sound like this, to put his emotions so openly on the line.

Yeonjun sighed, running a hand through his orange hair, still getting used to the new length and color. "I just... I don't know, things have been weird for me lately. I've been overthinking everything. And I guess... I didn't want to drag you into my mess."

Soobin looked at him, his gaze softer now, more understanding. "You're not dragging me into anything. I just... I care about you, Yeonjun. That's all. I don't want you to feel like you have to deal with everything alone."

Yeonjun's chest tightened at Soobin's words, and for a moment, he didn't know how to respond. The sincerity in Soobin's voice was overwhelming, and it made him realize just how much he'd been pushing him away without even noticing.

"I'm sorry," Yeonjun said quietly. "I didn't mean to make you feel like I was avoiding you. I guess I've just been... scared."

"Scared of what?"

Yeonjun hesitated, his heart racing. He wasn't ready to admit it, not fully. But he could feel the walls he'd built around himself starting to crack.

"I don't know... Everything," he said, his voice barely a whisper.

They sat in silence again, the weight of their conversation hanging between them. But this time, it didn't feel as heavy. It felt like something had shifted, like maybe, just maybe, they were starting to understand each other a little better.

Soobin glanced over at Yeonjun again, this time with a small, reassuring smile.

"You don't have to figure it all out at once," Soobin said softly.

"I'll be here. Whenever you're ready."

_________

a.n.

LLLLLLL SOOBIN IS A SIMP

lol jk, love u soob 😘