POEM'S with no title

Poem 48 by the request of @mysunshine_2021

~I miss you actually
~For the life of me
~I wanted to see you smile one last time
~Was that too much to ask
~Before you'd left this mortal lands
~Oh how i remember you so well
~Every nook or crook i recall
~Like all the moments when
~You'd just be reading the newspaper
~But those memories are quite hazy
~But i won't forget them
~I remember the time
~I saw that photoframe of yours
~Adorned with a garland
~It broke every part of me just right there
~But now i'm all grown up
~So many moments i'd loved to share with you
~Passed just like that without you here
~Back then i didn't know you'd just've left
~When i found out -
~I couldn't believe it then
~I'd thought you'd just be right there
~Holding the newspaper
~While i got back
~Those old tales of yours inside my head
~Can't believe i didn't get to tell how much i loved it then
~Now i'm left to thinking
~What would you have told me if you were here
~My emotions forming a lake
~But now there's a storm there
~Word's unsaid left just like that
~Actions left to be fulfilled yet
~But what pains me is the fact
~You've truly left
~The picture with a garland stuck in my head
~Reminds me of the moments that passed just like that
~Back then it all didn't feel real at all
~Every time i'd believe you were still there waiting
~I'd cried so much when i didn't understand back then
~But for you i'll keep it together
~But can someone explain me why
~I'm drowning in those memories
~When i was little i'd though if i grew up quickly
~I would finally be able to live with you fully
~I could've bought those blooming flowers
~We could've done so many things together
~Deafening are these thoughts of mine
~I know it all
~But i still hear that echo of your laugh
~It would've been better if i'd cherished it then
~How could i have known
~That you were leaving this mortal realm
~I hope that you're in a better place now
~I hope for that day we shall meet again
~I hope that you've found peace
~And with your peace
~I'll find mine
~So please just come back & hug me again
~Hug me or pat my head
~Just like you did before
~When i was a naive kid back then
~But that's only a wish
~A wish i know that'll never be fulfilled
~I'm fine now truly i know i am
~But the voice inside my head
~Says something else
~The lake has yet to calm dear
~You just need to give it enough time
~Disturbance there will be forever
~And you shall turn tranquil & still again
~But those raging emotions within my heart say something else
~Why did that happen ?
~Please just don't leave
~I wanna hear your stories again
~Who's going to sneak me chocolates now ?
~Please just come back
~I've lived with these thoughts & feelings enough to know
~That erasing them is a no go
~These aren't any mistakes
~I've understood enough of them
~But -
~Word's can't comprehend what i've felt
~But i know the truth there is
~I'll truly miss you forever & truly
~Love you always ,Gramps

@ mysunshine_2021 I haven't lost anyone in my life. But this is all that i could come up with when i thought of a loving grandpa. I hope you like this poem. With all the home work i have & well school work & the .......
Nevermind i just hope you like this poem