But Beautiful

part 45

"Jungkookie," Taehyung grumbled, turning over and blinking at the other man.

"Yes?"

"Why didn't you wake me up? What time is it?" he asked, rubbing his eyes with his fists.

Jungkook looked at the clock, humming. "It's about seven," he said, looking fondly at the other. "I didn't wake you up because you were sleeping, and you did a lot of walking today."

"Mm, okay," Taehyung said through a yawn. He sat up, hair sticking up in different places, and Jungkook's heart skipped in his chest like a broken record that only played adoration for Taehyung. "I'm hungry."

"That's good, I ordered food earlier. Let me heat some up," he said, gesturing for Taehyung to follow him. Instead, the man stumbled into the bathroom, waving at him as he mumbled for him to give him a minute through another loud yawn.

Jungkook smiled, beginning to reheat the food he'd ordered for lunch. He started humming, smile growing as he felt Taehyung wrap his arms around him from behind.

"Did you eat earlier?" he asked, kissing Jungkook's nape.

"I ate some," the man confirmed, taking the dishes to the table before getting some drinks from the fridge. "But I didn't eat a lot because I didn't get a lot of each thing and I want you to try it all," he added, sitting down across from Taehyung, gesturing to the food. "Nothing is spicy, so you can try each of them and let me know what you think!"

Taehyung smiled, taking a fork and spearing a piece of chicken. He sniffed it, taking a bite before chewing slowly. "This is good," he said with his mouth full. When he swallowed, he stabbed another piece, sniffing again, a grimace on his face before he decided on taking a bite. He chewed it, one of his eyes shutting as he made a face. "This one tastes like a dirty sock smells."

Jungkook burst into laughter, slapping his thigh as Taehyung spit it out. "I... you know, I don't think I've ever heard that. But I have heard that parmesan can be an acquired taste!"

"Guess so," Taehyung replied, face still screwed up. He picked up a piece of the last flavor chicken, skeptically taking a bite before humming with a nod. "Much better," he commented, taking a drink of his pop before looking over the food again. "I like the first best, and then this one. Not the parmesan though, that was gross."

Chuckling, Jungkook nudged the trays closer to Taehyung, shrugging a shoulder. "Well, I like it, so help yourself to the rest."

The other man nodded, beginning to eat happily.

"How's therapy going?" Jungkook asked, watching Taehyung as he leaned back with his fingers attempting to comb through his messy hair.

"It's going well," Taehyung replied, tilting his head to the side. "I had a reevaluation from the psychiatrist, since it's been years since I was originally diagnosed and I didn't see the same doctor for long. She said that I have PTSD, dysthymia with major depressive episodes, and social anxiety disorder. She's trying me on a couple medications. The main goal, she said, is to find the right fit for me chemically. I don't know," he continued with a shrug. "I listened to the counselor a few times, too. He's interesting," he added. "He specifically works with people who have anxiety disorders, and also works closely with members of the LGBTQ community so they can participate in therapy with someone who understands them, he said."

"That's great," Jungkook said. "Do you like them? I know that you said the counselor was interesting, but overall?"

"I think the psychiatrist is nice," he started, "and the counselor is nice, too. He asked me if I was gay."

Jungkook laughed, looking curious as he leaned forward, "and?"

"And I wrote down 'maybe', and 'why'?"

"What did he say?" Jungkook continued his laughter, the sound quieting to a few breathy chuckles.

"He said something about being able to tell. Some superpower about being able to use radar to find fellow gay people? I don't know, it was really weird. But he's nice."

"I can't believe the therapist said he had gaydar." Jungkook said, taken aback and amused. "I wonder if it would affect how he proceeded depending on how you answered."

"He asked if I was in a relationship."

Jungkook swallowed, nodding as he looked at Taehyung.

"I wrote that I was, and that it was with a man," Taehyung started, looking at Jungkook with a small smile, "and that he was really hot and he was good at sex stuff."

Mouth agape, Jungkook stared at Taehyung as he started laughing, joining him in giggling. "Tae," Jungkook groaned through a laugh, "saying 'sex stuff' sounds so juvenile."

"So? What would you prefer? 'Oh yes, I've a romantic partner who is handsome to the point of causing perspiration, and would you believe, he is also a master of fornication?'" Taehyung asked, using air quotes in addition to what Jungkook could only assume was his version of a proper, antiquated voice. "I mean, I could have said you were hot and good at penetration, or even that you're hot and good in bed, or maybe-"

"Taehyung!" Jungkook interrupted, shaking his head as he laughed. "You didn't have to add anything about our sex life to the answer," he continued, sighing in exasperation, "you could have just said you were in a relationship."

Taehyung blinked at him, lips falling from a smile to a frown. "I'm sorry," he said, voice quiet. "I was just having fun and was excited to talk about you. I can see now that it was stupid."

Jungkook's heart dropped, a twinge of pain stabbing him in the center of the chest. "It wasn't stupid," Jungkook clarified, "I guess I was just surprised that you would say – or write – something so bold."

"Should I not talk about you? Or us? I know I probably shouldn't have said anything about sex," Taehyung replied, eyes glued to the table. "I won't do it again."

"I'm not saying you can't talk about those things," Jungkook explained, "I'm just surprised you did. It can be a little sensitive, so of course I'd prefer if things weren't explicit, but I'm not trying to tell you not to talk about whatever you want to talk about. Just try not to mention me by name."

"Because you're embarrassed by me?"

"No, of course not. Because I work there."

"And it's wrong?"

"A lot of people look at it that way, yes."

"You used to look at it that way," Taehyung said, finally meeting Jungkook's gaze again. "Do you still think it's wrong?"

Shaking his head, Jungkook stood, discarding their trash before taking Taehyung into the bedroom. "I don't think there's anything wrong with love," he began, wrapping his arms around the other's middle. "But it goes against the medical code of ethics, and the reasons for it are things I do believe in."

"Like what?" Taehyung asked, arms circling Jungkook's shoulders as he nuzzled into his neck.

"Things that state why it's inappropriate, like how the doctor-patient relationship is built on trust," Jungkook replied, head tilting as Taehyung began kissing his neck, "and how that trust is built on professional rapport. And how..." he trailed off, moaning softly as Taehyung started to bite gently into the junction of his neck and shoulder. "And how a patient can't give true consent because their doctor holds a position of power over them."

"Mm," Taehyung hummed, pressing his body against Jungkook's, mouth against his ear, "you have my consent to hold a position of power over me," he purred, voice deep and sensual, causing Jungkook to shiver.

"A-ah, Tae..." he breathed, hands moving from Taehyung's waist to his ass, giving it a squeeze. "You're tempting me."

"Am I?" Taehyung asked, beginning to nibble the earlobe his lips were against.

"Mhm," Jungkook agreed, the way Taehyung sounded and the way his mouth felt causing him to grow hard. "What do you want, baby?" he asked, giving another appreciative squeeze to his lover's backside.

"I want you," Taehyung began, hands sliding down the front of Jungkook, groping his pecs briefly before the descended lower, lifting his shirt up and pulling it over his head. "I want to feel you, I want you to feel me, I want to feel you feeling me," the man said, bending down slightly to kiss along Jungkook's exposed chest.