He's got the whole world in his hands | Jeongin

Chapter sixty-nine

How do you communicate the dire need of assistance from a group of people who don't believe in psychology? Minsi tossed and turned all night. The drive back to Han and Minho's house was silent; a heartbreaking reality that it was all for nothing. You can hold your soul over the open flames of hell and for some, it's still not enough.

After a lot of crying and eventually having to pull over a few times due to tears, Minsi made it back to Han and Minho's apartment. The moment she stepped inside, Minho was sitting on the edge of the couch on his phone. Before he could utter an apology for his previous words, she fell apart.

"You were right and I'm sorry."

Worry spilled from his heart. Had she been injured? Did Jeongin do something to her? Before he could speak, she explained everything. Jeongin was acting funny and called it off. When Han joined the conversation, he hinted that maybe Jeongin was just struggling with the clean break, but Minsi knew better.

She knew how dangerous that kind of paranoia and delusion could be. His wide eyes were full of fear and his hands were shaking. Even after going as far as cursing at her, that wasn't Jeongin. After everything, Jeongin would have never cursed at her. Something was wrong with Jeongin and she couldn't let it go.

When Minho wrapped her in a hug, all she could think about was Jeongin. His arms used to feel like a holy barrier. No demons could cross his innocence and purity. Sins melted and dissolved from existence. It was like receiving a hug from God himself. How could a man go from the least judgmental person to a man spewing nonsense about the devil?

She couldn't laugh at the comedy movie they watched. They ate pizza, but she didn't bother to savor the taste. You can save a lot of people, but who saves the savior at the time of need? People tend to forget that even Jesus was just a grown boy; a boy with a bigger body, a bigger belt.

Men are full grown boys just as women are full grown girls. There's still an inner child left in all of us. It peeks out every now and then and it lingers behind. It's happiness when watching our favorite movie. It's the Christmas delight and the glorious feeling of perking up slightly when candles are sat in front of you at your birthday party.

Nostalgia tends to pluck at heartstrings and although we change, it doesn't always go away. People just want love and Jeongin needs love. Being cooped up alone in his apartment wasn't helping him. He needed someone to talk to and it needed to be someone that wasn't her.

The next morning, Minsi was the first one awake. She silently slipped into her room, changed into a simple black dress, and tugged on a pair of black flats. Weeks ago when she crumbled in front of Jeongin after breaking down from her assault years ago, he was her pillar. Whatever grief he was going through, she wasn't going to let him face it alone. Even if she didn't want him to be there, she was going to try.

Someone had to help him before it was too late. She had to do whatever it took. Maybe that meant being screamed at. Maybe it meant being exiled forever and it didn't matter. Even if it ended in disaster, she cared about him.

She wrote a simple note of her whereabouts and stuck it to the closed pizza box between Minho and Han. The two had bodies strung over each other. Limbs were entangled and Han's mouth was open. His loud snores filled the air. One of his arms was draped over Minho's torso. Minho's head was buried in the back of the leather couch.

When she woke up, she shut off the waiting screen for the movie they had watched the previous night. The empty glass bowl used to be filled with popcorn. Remnants of grease caked the sides and the pizza was half gone. Knowing the pair, they'd eat more of it for breakfast.

She glanced at the pair a final time before quietly leaving. In her car, her stomach brewed with anxiety. Would Felix believe her pleas or would he tell her to get lost? Maybe he'd be the one to finally get through to Jeongin. It didn't matter who, she just needed to know that he was okay.