Ymir's Necklace: The Secret You Hold | Levi x Reader

Fire

YOUR POV

All you could feel that night was absolute dread. You couldn't find sleep. And you knew you wouldn't. There were so many racing thoughts inside your head, and through the mess that your mind had become, all you could see was Levi.

Would he be struggling to find sleep too? Would he be experiencing nightmares? God, all you could focus on was him. Nothing else truly mattered.

As you laid on your uncomfortable bed, you could hear the chirping sound of birds right outside your window. It had been getting warmer and thus, you could hear them almost every single night. How odd, you thought to yourself as you laid in the darkness of your room: a sound that once would bring you comfort, joy even, was now associated with impending doom.

The sun soon began invading the skies and so you hopped off your bed and put your Warrior uniform on. Every single time you have had to put it on, your stomach would turn. You felt guilty, as if being forced to wear it implied you were somewhat betraying your friends.

In true, you had been nothing but collaborative with the enemy. You had trained among them for weeks, you had taken their instructions and complied their rules. You felt useless and used at the same time, but what motivated your submissiveness, ironically, was your faithfulness towards your friends.

You were so scared The Warriors would hunt your friends down you had forced yourself to become obedient. And it killed you. You could feel it dissolve your confidence and mold your identity into something they found plausible. Useful.

That morning, instructions were laid out plainly. The Commanders had gathered all of the cadet Warriors inside the mess hall. You had never realized just how many Warriors were inside the headquarters, but you quickly gathered they would outnumber the Jaegerist trainees.

You secretly prayed Jaegerists' would call for back ups, for more experienced soldiers when it came to fighting The Warriors. And to your relief, the Commander explained that would most likely be the case.

During the general meeting, you stood beside Freya. You could feel her eyes on you through your peripheral vision. Oddly, her presence reassured you. It provided you with some sort of comfort in the dystopian existence you were experiencing. You knew well she was just another Warrior, but still - a part of you saw yourself in her. Her naivety. Her inexperience.

Throughout the entire gathering, the same annoying thought found itself inside your head, yet again: how human The Warriors were. How fucking human. Broken. Betrayed. Abused. You just found yourself on the other side of a war that wasn't even yours. You still could not find it in you to hate them.

But your ruminations were interrupted when you felt a heavy pair of eyes land on yours. In the distance, almost fully concealed inbetween cadets and superiors, stood Hugo. He looked at you intently, as if trying to silently ask you something.

It was strange - just how much you had come to understand his expressions without a woud being spoken between you two. As you looked into his eyes, you could almost hear it, in his own voice, those words he was silently saying: what will you do? Hugo was asking you.

And it wasn't challenging. It wasn't arrogant, at all. His eyes were pleading with you. Begging. And in that moment, all of the previous fear he had managed to steer in you, truly dissolved. All you could feel toward Hugo, and everyone around you, was pitty.

________

The rest of the morning was complete and utter chaos. The entire headquarters were filled with cadets running around, preparing for the fight.

The Commander had warned everyone that since they had captured you, Jaegerists would most likely attack the headquarters head on. You had to admit, they were pretty precise about it too: the Commander and other higher ups had estimated it would take Jaegerists around a month to gather back ups.

Throughout the four weeks you had spent with The Warriors, they had trained like absolute fucking machines. And what concerned you the most, was that they were blood thirsty. They wanted revenge, they needed to see all Jaegerists die. Your heart ached every singlet time your head came to that horrible conclusion.

You were forced to assist Warriors with their ODM gear once midday arrived. So that's what you did. You were in charge of securing the gear on many Warriors and you could feel their heavy eyes on you. They were counting on you. Trusting you, even.

Without even realizing, you were in front of Freya as she handed you hear gear.

'You are nervous', she muttered. You could tell she was speaking lowly so nobody would hear.

'Aren't you?', you asked as you tightened the straps around her waist, your eyes not meeting hers.

A pause. The air was tense, anticipation and fear completely took over your head. You looked up to meet Freya's gaze and she gave you a tight-lipped smile.

'We are counting on you', she whispered.

You held eye contact for some seconds. What could you possibly say to that? They were all asking for something impossible for you to do. They were counting on you betraying your friends, betraying Levi, for fuck's sake.

And hell, you knew you would never betray them. Not even if it killed you. You would try your absolute hardest to protect them. To make sure nothing happened to them.

This power you held - it felt more like a curse than a power on itself. It was the burden you were, for some reason, meant to carry. As Freya left your sight, you stood by yourself as you observed the Warrior cadets linning up, preparing for the inevitable yet expected attack.

And you got lost inside your thoughts again. So many questions began pondering in your head.

Why on earth did you have the founding titan?

Why did Eren showed you the things he did?

What the fuck were you suppoused to do now?

But your ruminations were cut short, yet again. A loud explosion made your ears ring as you quickly covered them, your eyes desperately trying to find the source of the noise. You could see smoke and fire coming from the headquarter's gates amidst the distance.

They are here, you thought as your lips parted.

Your gaze narrowed, as if trying to gather something from the smoke.

Please, please let them live. Even if it kills me, let them live.

As you repeated those words inside your head like a cursed mantra, screams began taking over the entire place.