P.S....I love you //l.s//

11. Chapter

just as I suspected .. the night was funny. Louis couldn't just sit still but I wasn't mad at him at least I saw him smile and that's all I wanted.
I was tired at some point and Liam and Niall said their goodbyes and told me if I ever needed them they're here for me and Zayn is ready to help as well. I thanked them and after they were gone I just wanted to go to bed.

"Haz?"
"Yes?"
"They think you're insane now. You talked to me you idiot.", he giggled and I laughed. Fuck.. should've been more careful but oh well..

"Well that's okey they thought I'm crazy anyways.. I really struggled with you being gone and everything that happened and it's hard to know you're.. not actually here with me and alive and not real.."
he hugged me tightly and I smiled a bit while putting my face into his soft hair.
"No urge to walk through me anymore?"
"Nope I like this way better.", he giggled and I gave him a quick kiss.

"So.. what happened after.. you know.. you don't have to tell me i get that it might be hard and im really sorry.."
"No its fine.. you're here right now even if its just for me. I guess everything just kind of changed. When I got home.. god I wasted so much time I could've saved you and I just couldn't stop blaming myself for it."
"What do you mean by wasted time?"
"After I saw the tweet I was busy being confused and when i finally saw the text message I wanted to go home as fast as possible but Niall wasn't done with his food and wanted to eat up so I let him.. I just didn't know how stupid that depiction was."
"Harry.. we both know Niall he would never leave without finishing his food.", he smiled and I just nodded.
"I guess but.. it was so stupid not to go home.. I could've been there in time to safe you.. and then all the guys were brought home before me so that wasted even more time and then when I got home I thought you were taking a shower and didn't instantly open the bathroom it took almost 30 mins before I actually went in..."
"Harry.. its not your fault you didn't know what was going on and I mean who would come home knock at the door and be like omg he's not opening up bet he's dead", he played with my hand and smiled at me. "It's really not your fault."
"How can you be so.. why doesn't it bother you.."
"Well.. I did it knowing what I want.. if I would've known you feel the same way.. maybe Id be here still but I'm not and we cant change that. We cant change the past so why get mad about something that cant be changed. THAT would be a waste of time and energy."
"You're right I guess.. I just.. wish i would've been here sooner.. no. I wish i would've never treated you like that."
"Shh don't worry about that anymore.. as I said we cant change the past and I know you regret it but it is what it is now and we gotta make the best of it while we can."
"What.. do you mean by .. while we can."
"Sorry that sounded weird I just meant lets not be sad now but happy okey?"
"Okey..Let's Go to bed I'm tired." , I got up and smiled at him offering my hand.
"Mmmh okay." , we walked into the room and cuddled for a while.
"Goodnight lou.. I love you."
"Sleep tight Harry.. I love you too."