[Blue Archive] Abydos' Suicidal Hopeful

Regular Meetings with Handcuffs! EP.11

"....Sora."

"....Yes."

'Damn, I'm really screwed this time.'

The fact that she's calling me without even adding "-chan" must mean she's seriously angry.

Is this what they call the infamous 1 AM scolding?

'That damn teacher, where did he sell off the favor I did for him?'

I deliberately went out of my way to help him with his relationship points, and this is how he repays the favor? Stress is piling up again.

My head is starting to spin because of this.

'Not that there's anything I can do about it now....'

No matter how much I resent the teacher, I can't undo what's already been done, so I just waited for the punishment that was coming my way.

But

Drip.... Drip....

The punishment I expected didn't come.

"....You promised me, Sora-chan...."

Hoshino, who was angry just moments ago, was now crying as she brought bandages and medicine to treat my arm.

"...."

'Ah... I made her cry again....'

How many times has this been now? At least three times, I think.

"Why do you do this...? Why..."

"...."

'Right... Why did it come to this?'

It started as a way to die.

Of course, it hurt, and I didn't want to do it. The sight of blood made me nauseous, and my hands trembled.

But I couldn't stop.

No matter how painful, agonizing, or frightening it was, I had to die.

Of course, I didn't intend for self-harm to become a way to relieve stress, but that's what happened.

Anyway, what I'm trying to say is

"I couldn't help it...."

"...Couldn't help it?"

I came here not of my own will, but by the will of others, and unlike the protagonist of the novel, I had a reason to return home.

I can't stop. Or rather, it's too late. I've gone too far with both self-harm and suicide to turn back now.

Besides, if... if I give up here

"...Sora-chan?"

If I give up....

"Sora-chan! Sora-chan!!!"

The me back then....

"Sora-chan!!!"

Because #%%@.

(TL: it's literally "#%%@")

*

Morning in Abydos.

"....Well then, let's begin the regular meeting of the Abydos Countermeasures Committee."