Until We Fall (A Before You Exit Fanfic)

CHAPTER 12

ALEX'S POINT OF VIEW

Two months. It has been two months since I last seen Arizona, 2 months since I saw my family, Bianca and the guys and about 2 months since my internship here in LA started.

I can happily say that Los Angeles, California has not been that bad to me. Aside from the hectic work schedule I had and the sleepless nights, endless reports and cry-worthy subjects I have in UCLA, I can say that LA is growing on me. Despite the longing I have for the chill Arizona life I had lived practically my whole life, I'd never regret the choice I had in staying here in this city.

My first internship with Dr. Richardson ended a month ago but we - Sean, Sabrina and I - are called back a week after to work again for him. At first I had a hard time deciding whether I should take another internship with him or not but after a few calls to my parents and the endless convincing Sean and Sabrina made, I chose to accept it once again.

Connor and I have been very distant over the past months. The last time we had a real conversation - over FaceTime, of course - was when we watched the Heart Like California video together in his TV screen. The boys decided to wait a few more months before they release the video unlike what Connor said because they thought that they should post it together with a few bigger announcements they have up their sleeves. But of course, I haven't been updated with them that much and I haven't talked to them in weeks. Aside from my internship, studying in UCLA has been so draining. I go to school in the morning and then go to the hospital in the afternoon or even during the evening. I don't know how I have been doing it and how I've been able to keep myself sane despite my workload but I can say I'm proud of myself. I may not have wanted this at first, but it's all I ever wanted now. Maybe I'm really cut out to be in this field in the first place.

Maybe that's why I became distant to the guys. I decided to focus on my work and let go of the others. Connor has been trying though, I could say. Over the past months he has been continuously sending me texts, sometimes he even tries to call me but every time he does, it's either I'm working, or I'm in my classes. It's really not meant to be. I have realized that for myself so every time Connor does reach out, I don't really respond anymore. I know it's maybe harsh - leaving him like that, without any saying that I'm letting him go but I do hope he gets the point. He deserves so much more. Someone who could be there for him every single day. Clearly, I am not that kind of person.

"Knock knock!" I heard Sean's voice calling out from the hallway. We have become pretty close over the past months and even though he resembles Connor so much with his blonde hair, almost blue eyes and well, his second name, I haven't really seen us having a thing. We could possibly hit it off but I don't think we're both capable of even being in a relationship together. He has shown me signs that he likes me, by bringing me food every time I decide to stay in the hospital to work despite breaks, by giving me rides to and from the hospital and by visiting me here in my apartment as much as he can - because he knows I'm all alone. I don't know if that signs do prove that he likes me but I can feel it somehow.

Sabrina hasn't been joining us at our work-at-home weekends because she takes up her makeup classes in the University of Southern California every saturday and sunday. That is because she goes to the hospital often to work during weekdays so she takes her classes during the weekends. Thankfully, since Sean and I are taking our classes in UCLA, we get to work and study at the same time. Not that it's a joy, but at least we don't have to study and work during the weekends. Well, not that much anyway.

I sat up and walked towards the door. Once I opened it, he brought the bag of Chipotle takeout up, blocking his face. "I told you to bring the reports we're supposed to work on, not a bag of Mexican goodness." I said, getting the bag from his hands.