Until We Fall (A Before You Exit Fanfic)

CHAPTER 16

"I'm going to miss you guys." I said, the moment we all set foot in front of my apartment door. I unlocked the door and went in, motioning them to follow me.

They sat on the sofa and we all just remained quiet for a few seconds before Riley spoke up. "We're sorry we weren't able to tell you sooner. We want to spend more time with you, really. But it's just really unexpected."

I smiled at the three of them. "Hey, don't be sorry. I understand. Career first, right?" I said, and immediately realized what I just said may come off as something rude to them. "I mean, that's practically like the motto I live by these days." I said, avoiding Connor's gaze.

"We purposely asked to have a show in Arizona. Maybe you can come home and watch us there?" Toby asked, easing the tension.

I took a deep breath. I miss Arizona. I miss the life I used to have there. "Really?! That's so amazing." I said, genuinely. "But I don't think I can come home yet. I still have to finish my studies and such. Do you have a show here in LA? Maybe I can come?" I asked.

"We're not completely sure yet because we haven't seen the complete details. We just said that we wanted to have a show in Arizona, and he said he'll make it work." Riley said, looking at all of us.

"How I wish I could come. I miss Arizona." I said, faintly.

"Then come home." Connor immediately spoke. "You don't have to devour yourself with so much work. You need a break." He added.

I can sense the pain and a hint of worry in his voice. I don't want to argue anymore so I just remained quiet until Toby cleared his throat.

"I guess we have to go." He said, looking at his wristwatch. "It's almost 11pm. We have to leave by 8am tomorrow."

I nodded as I stood up, bringing Connor's coat closer to my chest to keep me warm. He placed it on me the minute we stepped out of the restaurant to wait for Riley and Toby.

I led them to the doorway but before I opened the door, Toby came rushing to give me a tight hug. "You've been like the sister I've always wanted to have." He whispered gently on my ear as he place his hands around my shoulders. I hugged him back instantly.

"Aw, Toby. You're so sweet. And you are like a younger brother I wish I did have!" I said, teasing him by pinching his cheeks. "I'm gonna miss you." I added, ruffling his hair before turning to Riley.

He's standing beside a very quiet Connor with his arms already opened. "Gimme a huuuug!!" He emphasized with his cute voice, imitating a cartoon character whom I believe is Mickey Mouse.

I laughed at his gesture and hugged him back instantly. "Take care of him, please." I faintly whispered to him, hoping Connor didn't hear what I just said.

"I got it." He replied, tightening his hug. We pulled away and I immediately looked at Connor who has his head down, with his hands placed inside the pockets of his pants.

Toby mouthed that they will be waiting outside, to give Connor and I some privacy. The moment the door shut, Connor immediately looked up, realizing we were all alone in the room.

"At least give me a hug? Before you go?" I asked, smiling at him faintly.

I can see tears slightly forming in his eyes already and realized that my vision is becoming blurry too with my own tears filling my eyes.

It took him a few more seconds before walking towards me and placed his hands around my waist, tightening the hug instantly. "I can't believe I'm saying goodbye again." He said gently.

"Hey, no goodbyes, right?" I whispered back, resting my head on his chest.

"I'm sorry for the way I acted tonight. It wasn't right for me to demand something like that from you." He said, easing the grip we still remained in the same hugging position.

I let a few tears fall before talking back again. "It's not your fault, Connor. If anything, it's my fault. I shouldn't have let---"

"Shhhhh." He said, rubbing my back. "Let's not talk about it anymore."

With that, he pulled away from the hug and he immediately cupped my face with both of his hands. "I'm going to miss you so much, Alex." He said, leaning his forehead into mine. "Don't forget about me, please." He added.

"That's something I can't afford to do." I whispered back. "Don't forget me too, the minute you set out for tour a lot of screaming girls are coming after you again." I joked.

We both giggled for a while before he broke it off by letting his tears fall. "I'm going to wait for you. I will, and by the time you are ready, I'll be here."

I can feel my heart shattering into a million pieces. I can't afford to see him like this - broken and hurt. I've done the one thing I've been trying to avoid the most - to hurt him. I started crying and when I was ready to speak, I said, "I know you will. But the moment you get tired, I will understand it if you can't wait for me anymore. I want you to be happy, really happy. And if I am not the person who will give you your genuine happiness, I will understand. I just want you to be happy." I said, wiping off the tears from my eyes.

He pulled away and leaned in to give me a gentle kiss on my forehead. "Then I guess I do have to wait for the one person who makes me feel like the happiest and most loved person in the world." He said, looking straight into my eyes.

I blinked away the tears forming in my eyes and I leaned in to kiss his cheek. "Thank you for everything, and this definitely isn't the last time we'll see each other." I said, smiling. "It feels like it, with all the things we've said but I will come for you one day if I could and maybe you could come again for me too. I'll wait." I said.

He took a deep sigh before speaking up again. "I love you, Alex." What?!

I gasped and I was so caught off guard with what he just said. "I'm not afraid anymore. I used to be so afraid of telling you that because I might just get hurt because, I don't know, maybe you don't feel the same way but now, I really don't care anymore. I just want you to know that I love you."

It took me a few seconds to take it all in before responding. "I guess I should learn how to not be so afraid with letting my guard down. I love you too, Connor. I've been holding back for so long but I figured now's the right time to tell you. I may not be ready to have a relationship yet, but it doesn't mean I should hinder myself from falling for you." I told him as I stare into his crystal blue eyes.

"You don't know how happy you made me feel." He said and after a few seconds, he gave me one final kiss on my forehead before opening the door, revealing a sleepy Riley and a tired Toby.

"Sorry guys." I said, giggling as I wipe my face. It was so obvious that Connor and I were crying, but I'm happy Riley and Toby didn't ask us anymore about it.

We said or final goodbyes and I gave each of them a really tight hug. I gave them a final wave as their elevator door closed, leaving me broken and all alone again.

A/N: This is probably the last chapter I'll be uploading for the week since I'm bombarded with a lot of school work. I'll try to update as soon as I can though! If you have any comments, suggestions, opinions and the like, feel free to leave it on the comment box! Thank you so much for reading :)