Unknown Happen Stance

Chapter 55: "'Done Being A Perfect Perfectionist!'"

Flashback: Descendants Live Action Movie 2, after Ben's return from the Isle, before Uma spells him.

Jane leaned closer, her voice barely a whisper against the bustling background of Auradon Prep.  "Ben," she said, her eyes filled with a mixture of concern and knowing, "I need to give you some relationship counseling.  About Mal... Maleficent's daughter. Don't make her feel like she has to be the ultimate perfectionist. It's what your dad keeps trying to project onto her, and it annoys her as much as it annoyed me last year. That trapped mindset was far from fun or inviting. As Fairy Godmother's daughter, I thought people would like me only if I was perfect—in everything I did, how I did it, and especially in front of everyone, most of all my mother. I got extremely nervous, agitated, anxious; my mother couldn't see through it, but every other kid at this school did. Following rules all the time doesn't make one a perfectionist; it never will. I've done some research, some compatibility testing based on your names, because romance can't rely on strong physical attraction alone to last forever, even if it's a good start. You need to compromise; develop ways of bonding that are compatible and complementary to both of you. Be compliant, but also allow each other to step beyond your comfort zones."

Ben leaned in, intrigued. "What levels are we on, Jane, according to your test results?"

Jane sighed, a hint of weariness in her voice. "Well, it would be far worse if you addressed her by her mother's full name. Since 'Mal' is short for Maleficent, no one could handle hearing her called that."

Ben nodded thoughtfully as he responded. "I never wanted to remind her of her past; it was a tragedy for her."

Jane's sigh deepened.  "You realize that other people in your kingdom will refuse to acknowledge that.  My mom being one of them, unfortunately. Her teachings were why I felt pressured into being a perfectionistic goody-two-shoes. But I'm done being a perfect-perfectionist! Because it doesn't exist, and it never will. People use phrases like 'Practice makes perfect' and 'Fake it till you make it' as propaganda, when actually, 'practice makes permanent' is the full truth; 'practice makes perfect' is only a half-truth."

Ben smiled, a genuine smile of understanding agreeing the following.  "You're very right about that, Jane. Glad to see someone else is opening up about the need to be true to themselves. Can you explain the test categories?" he asked, subtly changing the subject to help manage Jane's emotions and keep the conversation focused.

"Right," Jane agreed, regaining her composure. "Your affinity level with Mal is at 60%. Your fidelity levels are at 65%; your compliance is at 80%—you're strongly lacking there, Ben. You let your father walk all over you. Mal needs to know there are things you'll agree on that your parents won't. Without painful steps, there's no beneficial gain in this relationship. Your sincerity level, based on past events, is only at 55%; you were both bad at being sincere to each other. Your Trust Touch levels are at 95%. Your fun levels are at a dangerously low 35%, Ben—for both you and Mal, this isn't good. Durability: Mal's at 55%, yours at 40%. Stop backing down in front of your father! Younger generations are meant to grow wiser than their parents; it's a life necessity to become brave, unexpectedly. You're not a dead horse. And the descriptive explanation of how good your love is...the test says, 'You had good chemistry at first sight. Deep down, you know it's the right person. Besides, your harmony is perfect, and you have a lot in common. Don't miss your chance to experience a very special idyll.' And here's the advice portion's cryptic warning: Beware, even if you are feeling crazy in love from day one, the passion you feel is not a guarantee of sustainability. Get to know each other better, respect and cherish each other, build up your compassion for one another in order to build the foundations for a lasting and fulfilling relationship."

Ben grinned. "I see. Thanks for walking me through that. Nice to know I'm not quite a fraud to my girlfriend."

Jane, however, remained serious. "Ben, your relationship is only as stable as a see-saw in a toddler's playground."

Pyrix_Power

Switch Complicity to Compliance Complicity Is Inappropriate Category for Romance. Right now the chart is saying how much better it could possibly get but in current chapter I was adjusting to where they actually are in each category, Skylights.