Suicidal

Chapter 12: - A worse occurrence

CHAPTER TWELVE;

A WORSE OCCURRENCE -

(Play the song)

I murdered him, my own stepfather - Gary. He was just lying there, thick blood gently poured out of his bald head, turning the creamy carpet into a red, merciless and disastrous kind of colour. The door was adjacent to his body, preventing anyone to open it.

I was filled with indignation. How could I have killed him!? I...I never meant to harm him....I-I just needed t-to push him off of me....He....he didn't deserve this punishment I bestowed upon him, I was a cold and vicious killer, all because of him. I purloined his life, and I should've payed the price....

How was I meant to live? I-I couldn't pay the mortgage myself! Surely the council would get suspicious right? And, and what about his job, his boss would wonder where the hell Gary was, and why he wasn't turning up to work anymore!

The day was going so perfect, an amazing lunch with Lara, a nice afternoon....and then this happens, all because of me. I'm a murderer, a cold - blooded murderer, and because of this, I deserve to die. I deserve to be punished!

Although, I couldn't fumble and mumble over the past, I needed to focus on the future. Right now, the most important thing was to dispose of his body, I mean, I couldn't go to jail! I had my whole life ahead of me, university, holidays, etc. If anyone was to find out about this, then surely my life would be ruined; shattered to tiny pieces...... whilst I'd rot in juvenile.

I couldn't let that happen.

So, to prevent that from happening, I wrapped my hands around both of his legs, and dragged his carcass through the kitchen, and onto the green grass outside. There was a blood trail leading throughout the house, so I needed to clear that also. I didn't like dragging him through the house though, it...it made me feel more like a killer, a good one.

That was when I fell onto the grass, my legs sinking into my knees. At first, tears came out of my eyelids, gently. Then the tears became more frequent and powerful, each tear sliding down my face. I was a mess, a disastrous emotional wreck.....

Bearing up the courage, I eventually lead his body into the shed. He'd be disposed of in there, the terror that I had caused would be hiding from my everyday life, so every morning and afternoon, I wouldn't have to look at the disgrace that I created.

His blood was all of the evidence that remained. And I hated saying the word 'evidence', because it made me realise that what I'd done, was much more worse than anyone could ever anticipate. Gary may have been a total dick, and a waste of space, but I still shouldn't have....gotten rid of him. He wasn't the nicest guy at all, but...but he still kept a roof over my head, and (unwillingly) provided food for me; because of him, I stayed alive.

Now I'd have to fend for all of that myself.

And that was when the sudden realisation hit me, my relationship with Lara and my friends would change, whenever they would bring up the subject of murder or death, I would never.....never be able to look at them. I couldn't keep this a lie for my whole life, it would ruin me. It was much better for me to go to jail right? Then I could serve my time, and make up for the horrible wreck I've become.

No.

No no no, to go to juvenile would mean my freedom and life would be stripped from me, like a warrior without his weapons, a gardener without his tools. I needed life, I needed the freedom and friendship that I could possibly get. Sitting in juvenile and being rehabilitated - like I was doing now - would destroy me.

Then, I'd decided that it would be best to sleep on it. But first, I'd needed to clear the blood stains on the carpet, and sort out the issues of earning money to make a living. Which is what I exactly did, I went back through the house and found the silver mop and bucket of water. Carefully, I mopped the stains, being cautious to not spread it over the carpet. It wasn't a difficult task, nor an easy one though.

After doing this, I sat down on the kitchen chair. I'd disposed of the mop and bucket, like I did with Gary's carcass. I thoroughly fumbled through the letters from the post, eagerly trying to figure out the monthly cost of the house, and Gary's bank details. I needed to get a part time job, or even maybe a few all at once, in order to keep the mortgage and gas/electric/water bills at bay. Once I'd found one, I'd hand over Gary's (or mine in this circumstance) bank account to the manager, so they'd be able to pay me through there. Or perhaps just straight - handing cash over, face - to - face would be better. It'd be easier for sure, and I could easily deposit the money into his account at a local ATM. But not many jobs do that now, the managers prefer to transfer the payment online.

I'd gotten this all figured out, I guessed. Although, I was actually still feeling like a monster, and was pretty close to throwing up after realising what I'd just done. The only problem that lay ahead of me now, was learning how to cook. Living off microwave meals and tinned foods would make my cholesterol levels fly out of the roof. I figured though, it'd be easier to watch cooking tutorials online, that way it'd be free, and would be easier, rather than just taking the harder path of finding cooking lessons and booking them etc.

Either way, I knew that in the end, I'd be fine....no matter the circumstance.

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I'm really sorry if that plot twist made you sick or whatever, I didn't do it intentionally,

I promise:)

Have a good evening/morning/afternoon where ever my readers are in the world.

Stay classy!