𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒃𝒐𝒅𝒚 𝒕𝒂𝒍𝒌𝒔, 𝒂𝒓𝒊𝒂 𝒎. ¹

𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘪𝘧𝘵𝘺 𝘴𝘪𝘹. 𝘳𝘰𝘢𝘥𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘱

cigarettes after sex streamed through the radio, the two girls swaying along to it as olivia lit a cigarette, rolling down the window. "im thinking of getting a tattoo." the red head stared ahead at the road, the sun was slowly setting on the horizon. she felt peace grow in her chest as she turned to face the girl she loved.

aria hummed, sipping on the blueberry milkshake olivia bought her when they stopped at a gas station. it made her lips and tongue blue, olivia thought it was cute.

"an angel." that was all olivia said, her words a whisper in the wind.

aria turned to her, slightly surprised by what she heard, "since when do you believe in angels?"

olivia hummed, "since i fell in love with one."

the words were meant to be a friendly joke, it was true but it wasn't meant to carry all the weight it did. olivia always spoke before she could think better of her words.

aria's brows furrowed, "you're getting a tattoo in honour of me?" she teased, her voice barely hiding her curious nature.

olivia laughed, the sound echoing through aria's head. "cute."

aris just laughed, taking another sip of her milkshake. "don't you already have a tattoo?" the dark haired girl asked, sliding her hand up the sleeve of olivia's shirt where the ink rested.

a small deer, eyes big and brown and looking for something. it had been on her body for a while, she kept forgetting it but every time she saw it she remembered why she got it.

"what does it mean?" aria pulled her foot onto her seat, resting her chin on her knee.

olivia hummed, "james potter, it's a james potter tattoo." she hadn't really admitted that to anyone before.

"like the harry potter character?" aria chuckled.

"it's also for my james." she had always loved the name james, since she read her first marauders fanfic and decided she loved him the most.

"how could you go long without talking about him?" it was what confused aria the most, the biggest part of olivia's life and she didn't tell aria.

what did this mean for them? did she just not trust aria with this part of her?

did she not want her son to meet aria? because they weren't always going to be together. what was going to happen with them?

olivia gripped the steering wheel, "uhm," she was confused too. why had she never brought it up?

"i didn't want to miss him so i thought if i never spoke about him, everything would be fine." everything was not fine. she should have known that from the moment she held that small boy in her arms for the first time, when he was ripped from her for the very first time but never the last.

"why didn't you stay with him?" aria wanted to know more, she couldn't help but be curious.

"my mom didn't want anyone to know i was a whore, her words, not mine." olivia laughed, the thought had become funny recently. she had become a whore, maybe it was something her mother saw in her.

aria didn't seem as impressed by the words, her face contorted in confusion and a bit of anger. "no offence but your mother is a bitch."

olivia laughed, moving her hand swiftly to turn the wheel, "none taken."

"and you're sure you want her to raise your son?"

that was what olivia had always thought of. what it would be like for her child to go through the same torment she did. to be raised by the same loving, kind, monster.

"i can't really do anything, she has custody."

aria's head shot over in olivia's direction, "what?"

olivia laughed, running her fingers down her jaw, one hand still gripping the wheel. "she wanted custody of james but she couldn't get it so she would do random drug tests on me and one day i had an edible while ezra was babysitting and she took me to court."

it was random for aria, hearing this about on the news or from a friend was one thing, hearing it from olivia was completely different.

"so, that's what ezra was talking about." aria sighed, laying back on the seat.

"yeah, but im sober, yay." olivia waved her hands around a bit, aria watched her.

the dark haired girl ran her fingers through her hair, watching the girl closely. "is staying sober hard?" she had been wondering but she wasn't sure if she could ask her that.

olivia laughed softly, "yeah, sometimes." she couldn't remember when drugs started feeling like freedom. "especially when im at home."

olivia hated her house. she hated a few things, or a lot, but she hated being at home. it felt like a prison, where she had to act like a princess. her mother hated all her clothes, hated her hair, her attitude, her dancing, her smoking, her drinking. everything about olivia was something her mother hated.

"that makes sense." aria didn't know what happened in her house, she knew some things but she didn't know everything.

the car finally stopped and olivia sighed softly.

"we're here."

"yay." aria tried to be happy about seeing olivia's mother but she couldn't wait to meet james.

"james is probably asleep." olivia got out first, walking around the car as she opened the door for her girlfriend.

"aww." aria gave her a peck on the cheek. "i love you." aria watched as the girl started taking their bags out, pausing for a moment before she turned to the dark haired girl.

"oh, i love you, so much." olivia put the bags down again, walking over to her girlfriend. she grabbed the girl, so softly, and she kissed her. olivia's lips brushed aria's, she could feel every second of the kiss. it was soft and hard and so filled with love.

olivia pulled away, she kissed aria again, softer this time. "i will always love you." and in the darkness, aria couldn't see how sad those words made olivia.