I'm not strong
I'm just keeping a promise
Sealed like a Scarlett letter
Under years of tragic
With light shinning through once in a blue moon
Without you
Just know
I know where I'd be
The outcome Isn't pretty
I can't even form the words
But I hope you know
You don't have a cape
But your the heros in my life
I hope one day I can understand
How you see me as strong
When I can barely hold myself together
Numb is a sense I've become familiar too
You keep my heart beating even when I don't feel it
My thoughts are fuzzy
My words are slurred
My brain is drunken off tears of tragic
But my memory is playing those moments of oh so perfect
I don't have a clue how I'm still functioning
In need of a reset
With the exception of a few
things
Life has kicked me so many times I'm still feeling the aftermath
My world is spinning
You pull me back to reality
How is beyond me
I'm a hurricane with a chaotic history
I know you'd never lie
So I'm trying my hardest
To find myself how you see me
It's exhausting at the least
Yet I'm dying to change
How I'm living
How I see
How I feel
Verbal is something no one should ever have to endear
I wouldn't wish my tragic on anyone
I've lost all the ones that were never supposed to leave me by choice
I lost the one I swore to protect forever over a bottle of whiskey and unneeded anger
I can't even look at a bottle the same anymore
I'm attempting to change my own mind
With the help of four angels who I can't imagine my life without
I'm looking ahead
Pressuring the tragic like coal an turning it into a diamond
I'm not giving up
I'm just done with living this life
To me there's a difference
Let me explain for a second
I'm taking matters into my own hands
Not letting my past corrupt my future
Rust away everything I've worked for
Everything I've planned
I may not be able to see it myself
But I can feel it deep
That I can make it with a paradigm shift in my life
Just know
Even if right now I can't seem to see the light in my own eyes
That doesn't mean I can't see it in yours
So
I'm thanking the big guy upstairs
for putting you in my life to show me it still shines And my heart still beats for life
- Tanna
YOU ARE READING
Project Feel
Non-Fiction"Written words speak when your voice fails" I started this project almost two years ago as a way for people all around the world to see that they are not voiceless or alone and that there isn't just one version of life. Not only that but also to sh...
