Eleutheromania (Various Genshin x Reader)

Rite of Parting -43-

"Yoh! New costumers?! And pretty ones at that! You'd especially look good in a coffin. Hey, how about a 75% off discount on your next order. I can even throw in a couple's coupon if you'd like~"

You could only blink dumbly in confusion at the strange words of the young woman. Not three steps into the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor and this lady had descended onto you like a moth to the flame. Slowly, you took the coupon from her offering hand and slipped it into one of your belt pouches. "Thanks...?"

Whoever she was, the girl had eccentric written all over her from her flower blossom pupils within her red eyes to her career path in a funeral parlor. Smiling, she bounced back up, long brown pigtails swaying behind her in a playful manner behind her cute brown and red clothing - a Pyro vision located on her back to top the outfit off.

Paimon put her hands on her hips and glared at the girl. "Hey! What kinda greeting is that?! And Y/N, you don't need a funeral coupon so put that back now!" She demanded as Aether glanced between the group of girls and coffins nervously. The worker merely giggled and tipped her hat at the pixie. "Ya never know~!"

"Allow me to introduce myself," she went on, "I'm the 77th Director of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, Hu Tao. Hu as in 'Who put me in this coffin?' and Tao as in 'I can't geT OUt!' Hehe... No, not funny?" The girl introduced herself proudly before carefully examining your group. "Though by the looks of you guys... Radiant glow, healthy posture... Yes, you're definitely here for something other than that which falls within my regular line of work, aren't you?" She concluded with a nod.

Aether cleared his throat and nodded. "We're looking for Mr. Zhongli. He's a funeral consultant here, right?" He requested calmly as the girl took the information in. "I see. I see. Zhongli looks young, but his personality is a bit dusty," Hu Tao off handily commented, "Knows everything, but doesn't fret over anything. Hmm... Couldn't be that he's a... Hehe, forget it, whatever."

You and your blonde companion glanced at each other when she began giggling to herself. "Is he... here?" You asked with a tilt of your head. Hu Tao pouted. "Nope! Said something about needing to take care of an 'important contract' and left before that big storm. I think he might've gone to the Northland Bank," the director relayed while tapping her chin.

Paimon turned to you and Aether with wide eyes. "Doesn't the Northland Bank belong to the Fatui? Last time we saw Zhongli was before we went to the Golden House... Do you think he doesn't know about the attack on Liyue? Visiting the Fatui at a time like this could only mean more trouble!" She shouted.

You frowned in consideration. "We knew Zhongli was somewhat involved with the Fatui but... what's a funeral consultant got to do with?" You wondered aloud. Paimon nodded in agreement. "We had better go and make sure that everything is okay," she decided firmly.

"Be sure to come again!" Hu Tao winked as she bid you farewell, "and tell Mr. Zhongli this unscheduled time off is coming out of his paycheck!"

As you and Aether strolled out of the shop, the blonde turned to you with a sweat drop. "She seems... fun," he muttered awkwardly. "I like her," you shrugged, "she reminds me of a wallcreeper - that's a bird. Their wings look like butterfly wings," you explained.

Paimon tilted her head at you with a deadpanned expression. "You're not actually gonna keep that coupon, are you, Y/N?" She questioned bluntly. You side-eyed her for a moment before a smug, teasing grin crossed your face. Paimon flared up in annoyance. "Y/N!!!"

~*~

The Fatui certainly spared no expense in their interior designs. Seriously, how much did the Tsaritsa allot to her Harbingers for fashion and decorating? At least the Treasure Hoarders didn't care so much for appearances... for better or for worse. Seriously, some of those guys needed a shower.