Sin to commit (Valentine Series 1)

Chapter 29

I went back inside and put the rocks I picked to the table, Hiraeth gave me a smile and said, "I won when you left." with that proud smile she has, smug, I couldn't help myself to not show a gentle smile.

Kung alam ko lang edi sana hindi na ako kumuha ng bato at nakausap yung taong 'yon.

I placed my head on her shoulder, lowering my body, the game continued with me turning into a koala not wanting to leave Hiraeth's side.

I feel the guilt creep in my heart, what I said were sharp words, and I know it hurt her, even if she's done something to me it's still wrong that I said those horrible things to her.

I tried to lessen the guilt, but it just intensified, like when I told myself that she also said some horrible things to me, but I just felt guiltier because it just means I'm like her. That I'd hurt someone just because I couldn't listen to what they'll say.

With those thoughts clawing in my head I couldn't notice my card already winning. Nalaman ko na lang nung sinabi na ni Hiraeth na BINGO na ako.

And when that happened she already noticed that my mind is nowhere, not like earlier when the game just started, so she stopped playing, told them that we don't want to play na.

"What's wrong, Dawn, hmm?" she asked gently, her hand intertwining with mine.

"Just things." I answered, nervous that I might say something that would hurt her.

"What exactly, love?" she pushed, I looked at her, she's already smiling patiently at me, and the guilt inside me boiled, overflowing.

"I said some hurtful words to someone, and in my defense they said somethings to me too." I said, not putting too much details.

The fact that I'm talking to my manliligaw about my ex is pure betrayal, this is stupid.

"Well, you regret it now, so, I think it's best if you'll say 'sorry', but if that other person haven't told you that they are sorry about what they've done to you in the past, then I think it's best if you won't say sorry, as of now." she advised, I nodded, my face twitching because of my stupid ass decisions.

"Wow, pataasan ng pride ang atake, Miss Ma'am?"

"Its not about pride, Dawn." she said, squeezing my hand, "Its about knowing whether both of you are ready to settle your past, because if you aren't, then you'll just make things worse." she smiled at me, gentle, and then she added something that made me want to strangle myself.

"I'll always be here, Dawn, you don't have to worry because I won't leave, never."

I nodded, reassured by her words.

"So, this happened after you picked some rocks outside?" I chuckled nervously, not knowing what I'll tell her exactly. Na nakausap ko yung ex ko sa labas? Na yung ex ko na kamukhang kamukha niya na halos lagi niyang ipaalala sa akin ay humingi na chance para pumasok ulit sa buhay ko?

Before I could say something stupid I felt her squeeze my hand, "I'm sorry, I pressured you into saying something, take your time, Dawn, it's okay, I'm willing to wait."




The days passed, and the ache I've felt since my father left settled deep in my chest, my mother still has tendencies to cry. Wynea suddenly spacing out, and now, Aurora trying to avoid coming to the wake.

And me? I'm on my fucking way to the fucking building I am working at, because my fucking boss can't fucking understand that I am grieving, and someone fucking stupid leaked that information.

Tangina, hindi na naging mapayapa ang buhay ko sa mundong 'to, konti pa aalis na ako sa buhay kong 'to tapos mag-aala Kisses Delavin ako, hindi nila alam nag-engineer na akong tuluyan.