Uncontrollable Feeling

Chapter 54

Aiden Vasilakis 

Selfishness was never a trait I ever considered myself to have.

But now, I had become the embodiment of it. These past few days, selfishness became my life force.

Right after that horrific discovery I had a few days ago, the logical thing to do would be to distance myself from everyone I loved. Now I was fully aware of the extent of my father's hatred towards me, how little I meant to him and the dangerous people he surrounded himself with. 

I knew that my father's threats weren't meant to be taken lightly; I knew that he meant every word he said. 

I knew that he would do whatever it took to protect his empire, that he would sacrifice me and anyone around me in a heartbeat to preserve his legacy.

I knew that the fact that I was in bed with the woman I loved, watching her sleep, was putting her in danger too. 

But I was selfish when it came to her. The thought of losing her sent shivers up my fucking spine.

Kristal Jane Anderson had her very essence ingrained in every crevice of my being. My mind, body and soul belonged to her. I couldn't imagine a world without her. I couldn't imagine my life without her. 

This was supposed to be it for us, our happily ever after. 

This was supposed to be our forever.

I've lost count of the number of times I've opened that red velvet box to look at the ring. A ring that should've been on her finger by now, marking the beginning of our forever. Now, it was tucked away in my nightstand, and every single time I've looked at her, I've had to fight the urge to go against my better judgment. I've had to stop myself from blocking out the world as it crumbled around me to focus on the beauty that plagued my every thought—putting our happy ending above all else.

But that was a naive way of thinking, and I knew it. I had no idea what my life would look like in a few days, a few months, fuck, a few hours even. The texts, the so-called 'countdown' to my initiation, were becoming more frequent, some days getting close to the double digits. 

It felt like psychological torture, like a ticking time bomb I had no way of stopping, no way of knowing when it'd reach zero.  But I guess that was the point; to break me down before whatever came next. 

I thought about telling her the truth, breaking the news that my own father sold me to pay off his debt. But I simply couldn't bring myself to. Things were finally looking up for her, for us, she was finally. . . happy. I couldn't bring myself to ruin that, couldn't take that away from her for something that I barely understood myself. I had no fucking clue what being sold to a criminal organisation entailed or what they would have me do- 

"You're watching me sleep again," Her voice, her sweet angelic voice, met my ears, pulling me out of my thoughts. She stared at me with sleep-heavy eyes and a lazy smile under the early morning sun that snuck in through the window. "You creep"

A chuckle slipped past my lips as I leaned in to give her lips a quick peck, "Your creep."

Before I could pull back, her hand snaked around the back of my neck, holding me against her, our noses brushing "God, you're such a dork." She closed the gap between us with another quick peck.