It's now been two years since Santana's death and I finally came to a conclusion. She killed herself because she wanted to be happy.
I haven't talked to any of the guys in two years. All I know is Gilinsky, Nash, Cameron and Taylor were arrested and put in jail. I don't know for how long and frankly I don't care. I don't really know what happened to the others, I do see a few tweets from them but I don't really pay attention to them.
"Shawn stop daydreaming." Andrew says and I look over at him. "Your biggest show is tonight don't mess it up." Andrew says and I just nod.
This was the day Santana killed herself exactly two years ago. No matter how hard I try I can't get her out of my head. Since I can't be at her grave this year I'm going to cover a song and have pictures of her being projected around the stadium. Nobody knew what I was going to do, I made sure that my computer was connected to the projector before going backstage to get ready for the meet and greet.
There was going to be a band with me today, I've been preforming with the band a lot recently and it's a nice change.
Jacquie Lee and Bea Miller were going to open for me. They're both amazing people and funny to be around. I only like them as friends though, plus Bea has a boyfriend.
"SHAWN GUESS WHAT?!" Bea yelled in my ear. "What?" I laughed. "Jacob is coming to the show!" She yelled and I laughed. They haven't seen each other in a month. Jacob is also a singer and he's also on tour. They are the cutest thing when they're together.
Jacquie was was somewhere. I think she was in soundcheck.
I walked to where my meet and greet was and stood there as fans came up to me. A lot of them say I saved them and it makes me the happiest person ever to know that I saved multiple people.
***
I stood in front of the large crowd of screaming boys and girls. I got the crowd to be as quiet as possible before sighing.
"Nobody knows this but two years ago today my girlfriend committed suicide and I still miss her. On both her birthday and the anniversary of her death I go to her grave and place her favorite flowers on her grave." I say and the crowd looked at me with awe. I began to tear up just thinking about her, I honestly thought I was over her death but I don't think I am completely over it. "I sit at her grave for hours just talking hoping she hears me. I even sing her favorite songs." I say before wiping my eyes from the tears that were building up in my eyes. "She's the one who told me to show the world my talent and I am. I just hope she's proud of me." I smile before looking at the crowd.
"Can you all put your flashlights on?" I asked and instantly everyone's flashlights were on. I thank them before telling Ian to press play on my computer. Instantly pictures of her was being projected on the white backdrop behind me. John and Geoff had taken off the Shawn Mendes backdrop and put up a white one for me while I was speaking to the crowd.
"This is See You Again. If you know the words don't be afraid to sing along." I say before I sat down at the piano that was brought on stage. The band was also going to play in the back ground
"It's been a long day without you, my friend
And I'll tell you all about it when I see you again
We've come a long way from where we began
Oh, I'll tell you all about it when I see you again,
When I see you again" I started looking at the pictures and silent videos playing on the screen."Damn, who knew?
All the planes we flew
Good things we've been through
That I'll be standing right here talking to you
'Bout another path
I know we loved to hit the road and laugh
But something told me that it wouldn't last
Had to switch up
Look at things different, see the bigger picture
Those were the days
Hard work forever pays
Now I see you in a better place" By now the entire crowd was singing along waving their flashlights from side to side."How can we not talk about family when family's all that we got?
Everything I went through you were standing there by my side
And now you gon' be with me for the last ride" Behind me there was the video of Santana falling on the penny board in Toys R Us. She was laughing when she fell and when she stood up she was pouting into the camera which I found so adorable."It's been a long day without you, my friend
And I'll tell you all about it when I see you again
We've come a long way
from where we began
Oh, I'll tell you all about it when I see you again,
When I see you again" On the screen were pictures of us at the beach and pictures of us kissing the entire crowd said "Awe" and I smiled. Before continuing with the next verse."First you both go out your way
And the vibe is feeling strong
And what's small turn to a friendship
A friendship turn to a bond
And that bond will never be broken
The love will never get lost (and the love will never get lost)
And when brotherhood come first
Then the line will never be crossed
Established it on our own
When that line had to be drawn
And that line is what we reach
So remember me when I'm gone (remember me when I'm gone)
How can we not talk about family when family's all that we got?
Everything I went through you were standing there by my side
And now you gon' be with me for the last ride" I sang with all my heart. I sang with passion and love. Yes I was crying and didn't care. Santana will always be the love of my life and nothing will ever change that. Yes I'll eventually get married and have children but even then I'll still have a special place in my heart for Santana and nothing/nobody will ever replace her."So let the light guide your way, yeah
Hold every memory as you go
And every road you take, will always lead you home, home
It's been a long day without you, my friend
And I'll tell you all about it when I see you again
We've come a long way from where we began
Oh, I'll tell you all about it when I see you again,
When I see you again"I wiped my tears away before watching the rest of the videos. They were cute videos of the both of us doing random things. The last video was of me holding Santana in my arms telling her that I loved her. The video was muted but you could clearly make out those three words.
The words "R.I.P. SANTANA MORRIS" appeared on the screen before it was over. I turned to the crowd and smiled at them while still crying. I wiped my tears and so did a few people in the crowd. I took a deep breath before speaking.
"When you guys tell me I saved you it means the world knowing that I saved and changed so many people's lives. Thank you guys for everything. I love you all! I really do appreciate each and every single on of you, you guys helped me live my dream and I can't thank you enough! I hope you guys have an amazing night and just remember, I love you!" I smile at the crowd and the entire crowd starts to scream a lot of people yelled 'I love you' making me smile as I walked off the stage.
Once I got backstage Andrew, Geoff, John and Ian all gave me a pat on the back. "Great show Shawn!" Andrew says and I thank him. Bea and Jacquie came up to me and gave me a hug. "You just told 60 thousand people about Santana for the first time!" Bea exclaimed. "I know." I laughed before her boyfriend Jacob came over telling me that I was amazing tonight. I thanked him before going to get a chocolate chip muffin from off the snack take backstage.
Throughout my life I realized everything isn't like it is in books and movies. Not all love stories end with a happy ending and I had to learn that the hard way.
----------------------------
Epilogue tomorrow eh?
Follow my twitter: @/UnnaturalMendes
I hope you liked the book!
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Goodbye. {Shawn Mendes Fanfic}
FanfictionNot all love stories end with a happy ending