the heart wants what it wants

Clean Casa

Cameron got back in an hour with the beer. I replace all of it and put it in the fridge. Everything was clean except for the Kitchen. I walked into the kitchen then heard a squish. I stepped in something. It smelled. Apparently someone had to much beer and threw up. I picked up my foot and took off my shoe, good thing I was wearing my converse. I simply just threw both of my shoes in the garbage can and put on my combat boots. I cleaned up the spew and continued with the rest of the kitchen. I have to say it was the hardest room out of them all. After an hour of cleaning and Cameron helping me I finally got it all done. At 12 o' clock Mark's friends all left and everything was perfect, there wasn't a mess anywhere in the house. I saw a note on the fridge that mom left me. It said...

K-

I went to the store and already bought you your school uniform and supplies while you were out with your friends. I also got Mark's. There is a back to school meeting on Sunday at 12 o' clock for Mark's school and one at 4 o' clock for your school. I need you to go to them and drop off the supplies. Thanks.

Love,

Mom

She must have wrote this before she left. Today is Sunday.

Me: "UGH! Mark get ready for school pack your school supplies we gotta drop it off."

Mark: "Okay."

I don't know how I'm gonna get us over there. I guess we will just have to take the bus. Both him and I filled our back packs with supplies. We first went to his school dropped off his stuff and talked to his teacher. Then we rode the bus to Woodrow Wilson. I stepped inside and saw it was a massive place. I recognized some one there it was Janet. She quickly ran to me and gave me a hug. 

Janet: "Oh my gosh I am so excited you are here."

Me: "Me too."

Janet: "Can I spend the night tonight."

Me: "Sure I guess."

I dropped my stuff off and talked to a few new people. I saw this one girl who was deaf. She was with a couple other deaf people including Tasia and they were all signing together. 

I walked over and said hello to all of them. The seemed friendly. The girl I saw signing was named Annika. She is a senior like me. She was actually very nice. 

She was born deaf.  We continued signing with Mark by my side not knowing what the heck was going on. When we got home I went up to my room and Janet showed up around 20 minutes later. Mark opened the door for her and let her up to my room. She sat down on my bed and started talking.

Janet: "Hey, can I tell you something?"

Me: "Yeah what is it."

Janet: "I like you."

Me: "I like you too that's why we are friends."

Janet: "No I mean I like, like you."

Me: "What do you mean."

Janet: "I feel something between us. Do you?"

She leaned into kiss me, but I quickly backed up.

Me: "Whoa, no I don't and you have a boyfriend."

Janet: "I know. I'm gonna dump Max, I like you."

She tried to kiss me again but I dodged it, again.

Me: "Look you are a sweet girl but I'm not a lesbian. And weren't you making out with some guy yesterday."

Janet: "Yes but I realized, this isn't me, I'm not straight. I like girls. I like you. I was hoping you felt the same way. I guess I just was still trying to find myself. And the more I spent time with you the more I found myself."

She tried to kiss me once more and then I had it.

Me: "Look I don't like you like that. I'm straight. I don't judge you. I appreciate you coming out to me but I am just not interested. You are still my friend. Nothing has changed, I don't look at you any different. You can still spend the night if you want."

Janet: "Okay, thanks."

She looked sad. Like she had just heard a family member died. We started talking and pretended nothing happened. It soon was 5 o' clock and I went downstairs to feed Mark, Janet, and I. We cooked spaghetti. It was delicious. I make my own sauce. It was 9 o' clock soon and I sent Mark off to bed while Janet and I stayed up late watching Brides Maids 1 and 2. Then we watched truth or die. Janet had passed out and I was getting a little tired. I went around the house and turned off all the lights and we both slept on the couch. She slept on one side. I slept on the other. I slowly drifted asleep as my eyes got heavier and thought to myself. I love Texas. I woke up and felt cold. It was the middle of the night. Apparently I forgot to turn off the temperature. I walked back to the couch where I was sleeping and went back to bed. When I was a sleep though I thought I felt/heard Janet stroke my hair and whisper I love you. I don't know maybe it was just my imagination or dream. I woke up again to my phone alarm. It was 6:00 a.m. I walked upstairs and got my uniform from where I knew mom would put it. I knew she would go in my room and put it in my closet. And sure enough there it was. I got dressed in my uniform. I wore a white polo shirt and khaki pant and converse. I then exited my room to let Janet get in there and change. She came out like 30 minutes later wearing make up and her Woodrow Skirt and shirt and tie. We are either aloud to wear a skirt, shirt, tie, with high knee socks, and saddle shoes, or khaki pants and a white polo shirt.

I took Mark to school on my motorcycle and Janet rode in her car, following behind me. We arrived at 7:25 a.m. I walked in and suddenly my hole life changed.