Dark Poetry

I'm so tired

12am

The usual tired and sad feelings
Wishing I was good enough and wishing we weren't star crossed
I wonder why I feel so alone with so many people who love me - it's selfish
I keep thinking that people leave me but I just don't try enough to keep them, how terrible is that?

1am

Oh no, here we go again
I have those prickly thoughts again and I know I won't be sleeping
There's a storm inside of me and my power has been shot for weeks
My candles are running out and I'm so afraid of darkness

2am

My hands are shaking again
Maybe it's another earthquake?
Anything would be better than this
I realize how cold my sheets are and how empty I feel
Oh god I wish i never loved you this much why did it have to be you
This silence is driving me insane please fill these gaps in my bones

3am

I want to sleep, I really do
Mom I wish I was a better daughter for you, I'm sorry I'm such a depressed mess
I told my godmother how sad I'd get and she was so surprised, maybe I mask it too well
I'm sorry I'm not happy like how I seem to be when I'm numb it just feels better to be mostly empty than to have everything crush me like this please someone save me

4am

God I'm so tired
Please just get out of my head
The bottle says to only take one but not even three works for me
I can't sleep with all this noise in my head, it's suffocating
Maybe if you were here I'd be numb just a little longer
What can I do when the tears won't stop? They say crying yourself to sleep is a thing but I've been up for days and I've had no release
I'm so tired, please make this stop