My First Journal

10/7/16: Groupie Life

I went to the Twin Peaks show last night, my favorite fucking band in the world. I went a lone to the venue and I dressed okay. I saw a lot of tother teens who were dressed like me. I felt really at ease but the same time really insecure.

The first act Stead Leans I think were pretty shitty but okay. I got chatted up by this 21 year old guy from New Jersey. He found out I was 17 and was a little embarrassed but it was okay. So many hot guys were there though. I need to go back.

Then Twin Peaks came on and holy shit they were amazing. Annoyingly enough Jack the bassist had tweeted a few days ago he's never hooking up with fan girls which sucks because I want to fuck him so bad. He's so hot. They came out and it was weird seeing Jack in the flesh because I've been sort of stalking him on social media since August. They were amazing and everyone started moshing. It was my first mosh pit and people would push the front row and then push the back row so we'd fall into each other and then a most pit started and I got flung around. I was so into the music though and I couldn't stop smiling and jumping and singing. It didn't matter I went alone because we all connected in the end. I felt really alive.

I swear to fucking god that Jack was looking at me for a few seconds. I was in prefect range of seeing him, close but not to close. He stared at me for a while because I was smiling like a fool. I even tough the searched the audience when I got flung to the side and looked at me again fro a few seconds. I left after their act because it was getting late and I had school tomorrow and I didn't care much about Waaves, the other band. I wanted to end on the hight note. Maybe if I had stayed Jack would of seen me afterwards but portably not. Maybe i'm too weird and starstruck and romanticizing the truth. Overthinking it, probably. The music was so great and they were all amazing and Jack has this high pitched voice that' so cute. They didn't play Sloop Jay D which is my favorite but they played like a bunch of songs off Wild Onion.

When I left I noticed I lost my phone probably in the mosh pit which was annoying but when I walked to train I saw the guy from Lean Steeps, the front man doing a photo shoot outside the train. I stared at him for awhile. Maybe I should of said hi and said "great show" to him. Sort of regret that.

I got my phone back today but I need to go back and see Twin Peaks! Their tour ends in a few days so hopefully they'll do some more solo shows soon and I'm going to all of them! I love them and want to see Jack again too. Maybe I can still make my groupie dreams a reality because honestly if he wanted to fuck or talker anything I'd do it in a heartbeat. I've read all these groupie stories and documentaries with Pamela Des Barres and Lorri Lightning and I'm so jealous and amazed they go those amazing experiences. I need to feel that groupie experience and I feel it's possible. With another band. I need to go back to the plaza though and see more shows. I feel so at ease there and like myself.