I had my sexual awakening yesterday. Yesterday was probably one of the most defining days of my life and something i'll look back to a long time.
I went over to Lucius' house around 1:00 or so. He lived in a beautiful neighborhood on the upper west side, gorgeous old apartment and right on the Hudson river. He came downstairs we awkwardly hugged and went do to the deli so he could buy a sandwich. We talked although I was a little shy and we sat by the bench and talked. He moved closer and we got more comfortable talking and he tried to kiss me but I turned my head nervously. I told him I was inexpierenced and he said that was alright because he was nervous too. He told me he wanted to be a comedian. He mentioned this vine I liked and we both got expcited and he just kissed me and it was so wet and weird. My second kiss.
We went back to his place where his dad and sister was and I went into his room. We started to kiss and makeout and the making out got really heavy. He was on top of me and we kissed constantly and he felt up my shirt and and squeezed me ass and then he unhooked my bra and felt my tits.
That was the first time anyone's felt my tits like that. He said my boobs her awesome and he sucked them which I thought was weird but I let him. He tried to finger me by touching my croth but I told him I was on my period which was true. Then Tamara called his phone. I picked it up jokingly and she started screaming.
"Get out of there now! You can't be with him!"
I was so confused. She set us up. She said it was all a joke and she thought I was too much of a pussy to actually do it and she can't believe what I was doing with her ex. Lucius could hear the whole call. He kept urging me to just hang up. I almost stated to cry and she said so nasty "Are you fucking crying."
She was screaming at me to leave and then Lucius said loudly "Hang up on her."
She yelled so more before I hung up and I felt to shitty. I lay in the bed with him and talked about how I can't believe she did that. I told him a lot about her and he couldn't believe it. He said he thought she was cool and now she seems crazy. The truth is Tamara is crazy. She has major jealously issues. Lucius also told me he wasn't her ex because they never dated.
After that we went to go walk his dog and I ate an apple and talked to his dad and we talked so more and he kissed me in the elevator.
We went back up and his sister started chasing him and she yelled "The only reason you're being nice to me is because a girl's in there!"
I was like the girl on TV shows. The girl the guy is trying really hard to impress and he's embarrassed by his family. It was so funny.
We made out again and he put my hand to his bulge but I kept taking it away. I told him I didn't know what to do. He put my hand and told me how to rub it but I kept fucking up. Eventually he took off his jeans half way and he was wearing this Simpsons briefs and I saw the head of his dick because he had a giant boner. That's the first time I've seen a penis. I rubbed him out through his jeans and he said that was pretty good and I told him it felt good to turn someone on. He tried to take off his underwear so I could give him a hand job but I said another day. He understood and I kept rubbing his dick though his underwear.
We lay in bed again and he asked me what we wanted to be. I said we could just hangout and make out and not talk all the time and he agreed. He said he didn't want a relationship and I told him I didn't want one either. He said he wanted to see me next weekend. It felt so good for a guy to want to see you.
He walked me to the train, hugged me and I got on. I get texts from Tamara asking if I was there and I said I just left and she got crazy and started to demand if I liked him or we were dating. I started fighting and she got all mad and kept trying to call me and then on her boyfriend's phone. Mind you she was at her boyfriend's birthday party. The whole time.
I got home we had a conversation on the phone which was long but is host she said if I continued to see Lucius we couldn't be friends. I told her I wanted compromise and I didn't want to agree with her like I always did. When I ended it she said she couldn't believe I wasn't begging and to have fun sitting with the losers.
I caved in and texted her fine I'll break it off. But in truth I want to see him again. I'l have to be sneaky changing his name on all my contacts and lying to her face. If I get caught doing this nothing will t=be the same again. I'm risking a lot. But I want to see him so bad, and I can't afford to loose one of my only friends.
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My First Journal
SaggisticaALL THINGS THAT HAPPENED ARE REAL. THIS IS NOT FICTION. A diary documenting my final year of high school. Recently life has become this very strange television like reality for me. I went from invisible to involved. This is an entirely true account...