destiny

the alcohol made me do it

Josh POV
The past five weeks of school me and Tyler have grown pretty close. He stays at my house a lot mostly because my mom is never home and when she is she's asleep or to high to realize what the fuck is happening around her.
But tonight tyler invited me to a party and he claims that if it sucks then we can go to taco bell and finish the Disney marathon we started on Tuesday.
So now here I am in the back of Brendon's car with tyler singing a duet with ryan loudly into my ear as we approach the location of the party.
I dont know who's party it is but I know there will be alcohol and tyler, that's all I really want.
We pull into a driveway and race up the stairs to greet stumbling already drunk teenagers. Some people entering and exiting the doors. Most of them entering.
When I walk in my ears are assaulted with blaring music. Tyler grabs my hand and pulls me into the kitchen.
Millions of tiny butterflies erupt in my stomach with just a touch of Tyler's hand.
He releases my hand and pours himself a drink. I follow and make myself a drink.
I'm trying to get as drunk as I can because although things are looking up for me  I am still in love with tyler, and tyler is still just my best friend. When he rambles on about cute girls I am forced to agree with him and give him pointers about hooking up with them.
It hurts really bad and I would like to get my mind off of it for a while.
I dont dance, I'm not a big fan of dancing especially not at lame highschool parties where everyone is drunk and/or high.
The music isn't bad but its definitely not good.
I lean against a wall in the kitchen.
I see lots of people dancing, some kissing and going upstairs to be "alone".
Where did tyler go?
I can't find him anywhere. I guess I'm not really looking.
I pour myself another drink.
My sixth I think. Not that im counting. maybe I should slow down on the alcohol? Nah I feel great right now. Actually I don't feel anything. I want to find tyler but its as if my feet are glued to the floor. I look around some more and spot Tyler sitting alone on the edge of a red sofa. I decide to bring him a drink and sit with him. Maybe he'll want to leave.
First I down my sixth and start on my seventh, each one with increasingly less juice and increasingly more vodka.
I stumble on my way to tyler spilling a bit out of the plastic cups.
"Hey, brought you a drink"
"Thanks I think I've had enough though josh. I dont want to be sick later."
"How much have you had?"
"Enough"
I zone out a little everything's a little hazy and I'm dizzy. Light headed.
"We should leave. Maybe finish that marathon? This party is dumb, all parties are dumb."
"Ok-kay" I stutter
°°°
We take a cab to my place. Tyler says I'm laughing too much but I didn't even realize I was making noise. We get comfortable in my bed and press resume on Cinderella.
I look at Tyler, he seems so enthralled in the movie. its so cute.
"Huh?" Tyler says eyes locked on the tv screen
Did I say that out loud?
" 'mmmnothin" I mumble
Tyler POV
"Its so cute"
Is he talking about the movie I wonder
"Huh?"
" 'mmmnothin"
I'm a little drunk but no where near the level of drunk josh is at.
Josh scoots closer to me, if that is even possible. He rests his head in the crook of my neck. Chills run down my spine.
I turn to look at him. Our noses are centimeters apart. I feel his hot breath on my lips. And that's when he crashes his lips into mine and pushes me back against the bed gently like I am the most valuable thing in the world.
Josh is kissing me. I am not kissing back but I am not stopping him.
Why aren't I stopping him?
I can taste alcohol in his breath. He won't remember this in the morning. I probably won't either. I am forgetful when I drink and nine of this will even matter in the morning.
Josh stops kissing me when he realized I wasnt kissing back.
He looks ay me and freezes
"Tyler" he whispers
"Ty im-im so sorry I didn--"
"Josh you're drunk its okay"
"No Tyler I kissed you"
"I am aware, get some sleep"
Before he can say another word I kiss him in the forehead and turn my back to him
"Sleep" I repeat and he obeys.
Josh kissed me.
I didn't kiss back.
Josh kissed me for 1 whole minute.
I didn't open my mouth to give him entrance.
Josh even in his drunken state didn't try to make me open up, he didn't even think about our tongues comingling.
Just his lips on mine in a mess.
I'm thinking josh had a bit too much to drink and forgot that he was in fact kissing me, Tyler, a boy, his best friend.
I don't know why, but I kind of maybe sorta hope he meant to kiss me.
Thats a weird thought to have but I'm having it anyway.
Josh most definitely won't remember. I really hope I do.
°°°°°
Joshler kiss :D
Well not exactly a kiss but it got Tyler all messed up and maybe starting to have feelings??
Maybe :3 ahahaha