Promise me

Blacking out

Me and Joe had been dating for a month and it was going well, even though we had kept it quiet for the first 3 weeks only recently telling others. However It had felt as if we'd been dating for years, we were that comfortable around one another.

Moreover the original points to the bucket list had all been done, by done I mean defiantly going to be finished I haven't done them all technically but they are booked to do on certain days. Only one had be postponed, having a early prom was happening towards the end of the 6 month limit, but it was the day that worked for everyone the best. Italy was amazing, I only went for two nights, but it still classed as visiting. Joe and I went on the river in a gondola and Joe tried and rocked it, I thought we were gonna end up in the river. I'm graduating collage in 3 weeks! How crazy to think that! And Joe found out my birthdays next week so he has a surprise, which he told my mum. And then my mum got over excited and told me, what can you do? So I know we're going to L.A but I'm only ticking that one off next week! Also we went to one of my most favourite singers concert, that being Rebecca Ferguson. Then a group of us also went to a festival, that includes: Joe, Zoe, Alfie, Jim and Tanya. It rained the whole day! But it didn't dampen our spirits ... Just our clothes. One of my favourite things we did was Joe and I went on a lot of road trips, we got to learn so much about one another including stuff he never really shared on YouTube.

Closest friends of YouTube know about me and Joe. Even though Zoe was worried about Joe ending up broken, she was acceptable of the fact that's what we wanted. My mum was so excited and Andy just remarked that it took long enough.

But I couldn't help thinking, what if? What if, I not only did those bucket list points them but more? I had only thought of this as I realised I had dreamt of been independent from being young. Having my own place, own car and more to point even my own pet. How about I tried to do what I was going to do as an adult, now? Joe had offered to provide these things as, cars can be expensive, he wasn't really struggling with money however then it wouldn't really be achieving independence now, would it?

Joe had a lot of filming to do today so I decided to stay at home. It was about two in the afternoon and my mum shouted me down stairs.

"Coming" I reply. Energetically I run down the stairs to be seated next to my mum.

"What's up?" I said sensing tension in the air.

"Jane, I've .. I've been in contact with your father and told him that your terminally ill, he wants to see you"
I froze, I felt angry for my mum to not ask my permission. I felt confused to why he hadn't seen me for four years and suddenly he would out of sympathy. Mostly I felt sadness because it was tempting as after all he was my dad.

"Mum he walked out on us how could you think this was ok?"

"Jane as a parent of you, just like your father I couldn't imagine not being able to see you before times up"

"But he can't just wonder it to my life like this-"

"I'm not forcing you to see him but please consider it" she said.

"I have 4 months left and I don't want to spend any of it with him not even one day!"

"But-"

"No buts this is how I want it"

"But you may get worse and it will be difficult for him to see you like that"

"So it's about him now?" I say.

"No but as your mum I couldn't imagine see you worsen-"

"Well I'm not going to see him and I'm not going to become drastically ill out of the blu-"
I suddenly lost all breathe, as I panted I felt hot and dizzy my eyes couldn't focus, everywhere was one blur. My head was pounding. Every sound was muffled and quiet, I started to sway I could hold myself up.
"Jane what's the matter?"
"Jane?" Then an excruciating pain my me grab my side in agony then it went black.
"Oh my god Jane!"

As my eyes opened I looked around to be in a hospital, I wasn't aware what had happened.
"Mum?"
"I'm here chick don't worry" she said coming round the curtain.
"I don't know what happened" I say holding my throbbing head and sore side.
"It's ok it's ok, get some rest"
I drift back asleep.

Once again I wake up only for the doctor to be in the room with my mum.
"Miss Rennet your awake"
I nod weakly.
"Well we have some news, you have abdominal cancer, we thought you had it in your blood, but it seems to have started here and then continued to spread around your body."

"So can it being abdominal effect anything" my mum asks.

"It can be painful at times and you'll know when your body has lost the fight as you could have a haemorrhage in the abdominal area, as your blood vessel won't be working as well"

"Oh right I see" I say.

"Also the reason you passed out was stress, now that your weaker it effects you more so take it easy with that you can go home"

"Thank you" I say, I text the news to Joe he was really worried but I ensured him it was nothing. Then we headed home.

AUTHORS NOTE:
Wrote this with birthday cake, pretty good to me!