Promise me

Last Dance

Today was the day, I had got my dress, ticked off all things on my bucket list besides driving. I had been very happy within these months, and to finish my life I felt this dance was perfect, it was called the goodbye dance and I invited all the people who had helped me within these months.
How do I know it will be the last thing I do? I don't really, but I have a gut feeling, as well as a terrifying instinct that today was the day I would die. Needless to say how, as that frightens me more. I'm going to be with the person I love most not that it's easy for him. I had wrote my will, and speeches for this dance. It was always preparation with me, I relied on it so I was organised.

Adding finishing touches to my makeup whilst the hair dresser, who had came to my house, finished the last sections of my hair pinning them up with a few strands curled at the front. I thanked her before she left, Joe walked in with his jaw attached to the floor.
"Wow"
"Thanks" I smile shyly I go to stand up but instantly struggle, Joe provides his shoulder so I can lean on him.
"So what time are they coming?" I say smoothing my dress down.
"Well we need to go to the reception" I look at him confused,
"Reception?"
"Yeah I thought we should have it at a much more dapper place".
"Joe you didn't have to do that" I smile letting a single tear roll off my cheek,
"I did, how would someone so beautiful tie in with a simple apartment" I laugh, to his response instantly making me forget all worries so I could enjoy the night. 
"Thanks Joe! Thanks for everything, I love you so much"
"No problem"
I hug him, then kiss him before pulling away I adjust his collar before we walked to the event.

Inviting all the guests in we greeted them at the door, the setting was beautiful there was a winding staircase, a traditional fireplace and an oak themed dining table, the hall was massive so there was plenty of room to dance/mingle.
Outside was beautiful garden there was strings of fairy lights floating above us with candles as centre pieces on each table.

The whole night was perfect, I spent time with each individual there: youtubers, family, friends and of course even Winnie. My mum and I had our dances to troye's songs. When we all settled down for our meal, I chose to sit next to my dad, we talked about everything he had missed. He was proud of my results and although I didn't agree with what he did, I forgave him so I know he could live with me going, living with the previous choices he had made without guilt.

Everyone looked so posh, as we all took photos and embraced, it was like a wedding really with wearing such smart elegant outfits. It was time for my speech, however no matter how much confidence I had gained I was still dreading all those people watching me. Yet I know all I would have to do was look at my mum, Joe and Andy all next to one another rooting for me to succeed in success reading my speech.

Twiddling the paper in my hand of written speech, I stand at the front, shaking. Tapping the microphone, I grab everyone's attention.
"Ermm hi, thank you for coming-" I look at the paper, deciding I don't need a script I scrunch it throwing it to the side.
"So I had planned this but one thing I've learnt is nothing ever goes to plan, I met my favourite youtuber as a point on my bucket list, shout out to my nan making it happen, hoping to make my last months the best ever! I didn't expect it to become even better than the word best" I say laughing before continuing.
"After ignoring the rules and just living my life in a more natural way, I can certainly say that he's made my life amazing." I smile to Joe the audience echoed awes. I still continued...
"Andy explained I always put others first and, after my diagnoses I should really, care a little more about myself. Which I certainly have. I have done some great things. I didn't want to seem like, a charity case or a pain as I'm leaving your lives so soon, when we have became so close. I have a thank you to all of you for treating me so kindly and like I wasn't any ill girl I was just me Jane Rennet a dear friend, I feel like I've known you all for years! Also not forgetting my mum who went through the agonising wait of the doctors ... Also thanks to my dad who came when I needed a father figure the most he's the true inspiration for getting your life back on track! So here's a toast"
My dad raises his glass whilst looking so shocked.

After numerous laughing fits with Zoe, Tanya and Niomi. We embrace as they all set off home, I hugged my aunties and uncles as they head off with my nan. Leaving the other youtubers to say their goodbyes. Leaving my mum and dad, I hugged them so tight I thought they could have stopped breathing. Andy and I got emotional towards the end, but we had more smiles then tears. Each and every single hug felt like a burning fire that could melt like wax drying still in that fraction of time. As if no one wanted to let me go, which I believe is highly important as I do want people to live there lives with me as nothing but a memory, a happy determined memory.
Then it was Joe and I left.
"Wait here I have a dress that was sort of just for our last dance"
"Oh ok princess"  he says holding the side of my head whilst kissing my forehead then walking out to the beautiful scenery outside. The word Last it quite a word that's haunting, it means you'll never get something back again, therefore you must, defiantly must cherish that moment.