(1D) Saw ; The Beginning

( LTM )

Louis Tomlinson ;

"I love you..." I whispered to her, kissing her on the lips. "You know that? Don't you?"

Eleanor blushed. "I love you too, always--"

A loud slam echoed from the front of the bus. I sat up looking out to see Zayn marching his way to his bed. He hopped up on the top bunk and closed his curtain, probably not wanting to be bothered like usual. It wasn't long after before the rest of the boys trickled in.

"Where are you going?" Eleanor frowned as I got up.

"I'm gonna check on him--" I sighed.

"Why?" she tugged on my arm. "He's fine. It's not like he's gonna open up to you anyways, he's been so different lately, you said it yourself--"

I sighed again. "I know babe but, that's still my best mate somewhere deep inside there, and mate's don't give up on each other. He's probably just going to through a rough time and he's trying to deal with it alone. I'll only be a second--"

I kissed her, and for some reason it felt so, empty. She let go of my wrist and made my way over to Zayn's bunk. Luke met me half way, giving me the same odd look he always does.

"What's wrong with him?" I asked Luke, scratching my head. He better than anyone would know what Zayn was thinking. He was the only one Zayn ever really talked to lately.

Luke shrugged. "I-I think he's just tired..."

"Fuck off--" I heard Zayn grumble. "Both of you, just wake me up when we get there..."

"Z-Zayn? I-I know there's something wrong with you mate just--" I tried.

"I said fuck off!" he growled more viciously this time.

I sighed. "Fine, I was just trying to help..."

I looked at Luke who frowned back at me, shrugging as if he were sorry. I shook my head at him, letting him know that it wasn't his fault. He shouldn't have felt bad. Zayn was just really good at keeping his problems to himself and it hurt sometimes.

"L-Lou?" Luke muttered sounding almost, afraid? "Can I, talk to you for a second...?"

I shot him an odd glance a little caught off guard. "S-sure mate? What's up?"

"Alone?"

I looked back at Eleanor, then back to Luke. Something about the tone in his voice didn't seem right. I scratched my head a little confused before realizing that he was still waiting for my answer.

"Y-yeah? Sure, is everything alright?" I lowered my voice so the other boys couldn't hear.

"Just, c'mon--"

Luke pressed his way through other boys who all just sat around the front half of the tour bus shouting loud banter like Zayn wasn't in the dumps. They were just so used to it by now. I didn't blame them. I followed not too far behind him until we were standing outside in the quiet.

"What's this about?" I folded my arms across my chest for warmth.

"I-I don't," Luke stuttered, gulping the lump in his throat. "I-I don't know how to tell you this mate... But... I-I mean... You've done nothing but be an older brother to me and... And I-I've been... I-I haven't been truthful about--"

"Out with it!" I urged him. I could see that it was eating at him. Tears were starting to form in his eyes. What was this about? "Luke, you know you can tell me anything mate. I'd never judge you for anything--"

"This is different..." his voice cracked. His lips started to quiver. I could see the tears rolling over in his eyes. "P-please... Please don't hate me..."

"Luke?" I put a hand on his shoulder for comfort. "I would never hate you--"

"You don't know what I've done--"

"Alright you two, on the bus!" Paul's mellow boom of a voice caught both of our attentions. We turned back to look at him wearing that same strict look on his face. "We've gotta get you all back--"

"Just a second Paul we're kinda in the middle of somethi--"

"I said, on the bus," he gnarled. "You two can pick this up on the bus--"

"A-actually," Luke piped up, wiping the tears from his eyes. "Ashton was gonna drive us back to the hotel in the van, I-If that's alright? We didn't really want to go out tonight--"

"Fine, but you," he pointed at me. "Back on the bus. We're leaving--"

"Just a second can we finish our--"

"Now!" he boomed.

"I-It's okay," Luke sniffled, smiling through the tears. "I'll just, tell you when we get back to the hotel..."

I glared at him, curious now more than ever. But, as he gestured to me that everything was gonna be okay I shook my head and followed Paul back onto the bus.