The Battle For Porcelain (VERY SLOW UPDATES!)

Chapter 11-Ew Boys

Warning! There is going to be a lot of swearing in this chapter!

.oO Spencer's POV Oo.

I rolled over on my bed. I felt Josh's, warm arms slither around my waist. I smiled. He kissed me.

"I love you." I said. I was happy Josh forgave me.

"I love you to." Josh started kissing me more roughly. He started to lift my shirt With his hands.

"Josh. Don't." He didn't. His hands went under my shirt.

"Josh quit it."

"Why? Don't you love me Spencer?"

"Josh. Please. Stop."

I woke up in a gasp for air.

It was all a dream. Josh didn't forgive me. Nothing of that happened. I don't know what I can do for Josh to forgive me.

I walked out of my room. I ran into Matt.

"Is he still in there?" I asked.

"He hasn't left since Friday."

"What am I gonna do Matt?" I hugged him. "I didn't do anything! I wouldn't do that to Josh! If someone kisses me other than Josh. I would probably slap them! I love him Matt!"

"I know you do, Spencer. I wish I could help. I really do. C'mon. Lets go have breakfast, alright?" I nodded. Matt and I walked down the stairs and into our kitchen.

"I'll make you some pancakes. Okay?"

"Thank you Matt." Ian walked down the stairs in his pajamas.

"How are you, Spencer?"

"Shitty. I had a dream last night."

"What was it?"

"Josh forgave me. And we started kissing and he put his hands up my shirt."

"Woah. Woah. Woah! I don't need to hear this!" Ian whined.

"I told him to stop. But he didn't. Then I woke up."

"Spencer, put yourself in Josh's shoes."

"I can't. His feet are bigger than mine."

"Nononono. I mean out yourself in his place. How would you feel if you saw Josh kissing someone else."

"HE DIDN'T FUCKING KISS ME!"

"I know. But what if you thought you saw someone kiss Josh."

"Well. I guess I'd be upset."

"Do you understand how he feels?"

"Yea. I guess. But wouldn't he be mad at Wren. Not me?"

"Well. He said, you didn't do anything."

"Why would I do something when NOTHING FUCKING HAPPENED?! You know, Ian. It really seems like your not siding with your own fucking sister. I know there's no fucking sides. But still. Fuck." I walked away. I'm not going to say something I'm going to regret.

"Spencer, you're pancakes are ready."

"Thank you Matt."

"Spencer, I'm not trying to be this way. But I know how Josh feels. And it sucks to feel that way. I'm sorry."

"It's okay." I quietly ate my pancakes.

"Thanks for breakfast Matt."

"Anytime." He smiled. I walked in my room.

For all I know Josh could've OD'd on something, started self harming again, even started doing drugs again. I don't want to be the cause of that. I got dressed. I wonder if Josh saw my tattoo. My fucking stupid tattoo. I'm going to get it fucking removed one of these days. Fuck. In still pissed. I need to calm down.