Light On {Niam Love Story}

Twenty-Seven.

A/N: Everybody in the house say AYYYYYYYYYYYOOOOOOOOO! Whassup, guys? I'd like to start this off by saying that my favourite people in the entire world are homosexuals because - well, why would they not be? Random note that was not needed of the day, of the week, of the CENTURY. Right. Well. THIS CHAPTER WILL INCLUDE ZARRY. LOTS OF ZARRY. MMM, ZARRY. This, is chapter twenty-seven and BUCKLE IN BECAUSE THIS ONE IS GOING TO BE A WILD RIDE. Seriously. ANYWAYS. This chapter is dedicated to "PrincessNiam" because she is Jesus in a can, okay. The songggg is Paradise Circus by Massive Attack because it's perfect and yes. Enjoy!x

"Look at her, with her smile like a flame."

"Can I talk to you?"

"Why would you want to? Why would you want to talk to someone as pathetic as me - someone that you never even loved?"

"Zayn," Harry tried to coax, reaching out to touch the older lad. Zayn jerked away from his touch. "You know that's not true. I was mad, alright? I didn't like seeing you kissing anyone else but me. I was wrong, okay? Is that what you want  to hear?"

Zayn shoved his hands in the pockets of his jacket, and looked down at the ground. "No, it's not. I meant what I said, Harry. I hate you."

"You don't mean that," Harry tried to convince himself just as much. He didn't want Zayn to hate him, but it was a little too late, and deep down, he did know that. He wanted to love Zayn again, the proper way, but he wanted it to mean something. He didn't want lies, and he didn't want betrayel. He just wanted Zayn. "I love you, Zayn. You know I love you. You know that I always have. Louis isn't going to change that, and I hope to god you're not going to let Niall change that."

"Stop talking to me," Zayn grumbled, about to head to his car, but Harry grabbed his arm and yanked him back. "Go back to Louis. He's waiting for you."

On instinct, Harry looked over at Lou's car - seeing the smaller man sitting in the driver's seat, staring down at the steering wheel. He wasn't happy, but suddenly, Harry didn't care. He didn't want Louis anymore. He never did.

"You promised, Zayn," Harry whispered, staring up into those amber eyes that he loved ever so much. "You promised that you would stay with me, no matter what. You said that nothing would ever come between us."

Zayn looked at him, eyes on fire. Pissed, confused, and then pain. "Harry...you broke up with me, while I was in the hospital. When I was broken, and all I needed was you. And you didn't care. You said that you cared about me. I always loved you, Harry. You were the one who ended this. You lied to me, Harry."

"I didn't lie."

"You said you loved me, and you didn't. And that makes you, a liar."

"Come here, Zayn," Harry whispered, and opened up his arms. Zayn looked a bit reluctant at first, but he ended up stepping into his ex-boyfriend's arms, and let Harry hug him. He felt a few, tiny raindrops hit the top of his head as he wrapped his arms around the younger lad's waist. "I want you to know that I love you. I want you to know that I made a big fucking mistake when I let you go. You were the best thing that ever happened to me. And I was so damn stupid for not realizing that when it mattered the most."

Through all of this, through the weakness shining through in Harry's voice and through the rain that was beginning to pick up, Zayn just stood still - silently taking it in and listening to Harry's heartbeat. He missed this, more than he was willing to admit.

"Please," Harry whispered, hands running up and down Zayn's back in a steady motion. "Forgive me, love. I can't do this without you. I need you, Zayn. I've missed you. I haven't been sleeping the same, it hurts to eat...Louis isn't the same, and he could never be better. He doesn't keep me safe the way that you did. He doesn't cuddle me when I have nightmares, he doesn't make me tea when I can't sleep, he doesn't do anything for me. You did."

"Harry-,"

"That's not it, though. He could never love me the way that you did. We always fight, and he's so rough and mean...you weren't. You're not Louis. You're Zayn-fucking-Malik and I love you more than I realized I could. Take me back, please."

Zayn pulled away just enough so that he could press a gentle kiss to Harry's lips - warmth radiating through his body despite the chill of the rain.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I love you."

Zayn walked away, and Harry fell apart.

~-~-~

The concept of death was such a funny thing.

What happened? What did people do? What did they think, what did they say - about you, about all of this? Did they cry, did they laugh, did they spend the rest of their lives in misery? In Harry's case, he doubted it.

No one loved him anymore. It was sex, sex, sex. He wasn't loved. Zayn loved Niall. Niall loved Liam. Louis loved Eleanor. No one loved Harry.

Zayn used to kiss him.

Niall used to shamelessly flirt with him.

Louis used to be there whenever Harry needed a bit of action.

Now everyone hated him, and he gave them a reason. They complained about everything that he did. They lied right to his face. They acted like they loved him when they never really did. Why didn't anyone love him.

He found himself thinking about this while he stared off at the sky, at the bright stars and the bright moon. All the buildings with their lights on, probably people inside who loved and had love. Harry had everything, but that wasn't enough. He had the money, he had fans, he had a beautiful voice and the best mates a lad could ask for.

But he wanted a boyfriend. He wanted Zayn.

But Zayn didn't want him.

"Nobody wants me," Harry whispered, purely to himself. "And why would they? I'm nothing. Fucking...nothing..."

Harry climbed on top of the guardrail.

He took a breath.

And Harry Styles said goodbye to his precious little world.