Movie Boy // Newtmas AU

(Dayskip) Day Nineteen

Newt's POV
I sigh and climb out of the bed, ugh, still at Minho's house. I get up and look at my reflection, luckily I haven't broken down and become depressed and starved myself...yet. I'm waiting for it though, that kick in the ribs where I fall to the ground and cry and just feel myself dying. I shake my head as if it will clear the negative future which is coming my way and I have a shower. I sigh and relax in the shower, as if the water can wash away all my worries- of course when I come out, no pun intended, they all come back. I groan and get dressed into a white t-shirt and black skinny jeans. Ugh. I'm so done with everything. I feel like my heart has been ripped out, a part of it cut away and then my heart put back with a hole in it.
I never knew liking someone so much, putting all your trust in someone, and then having it broken could hurt so damn much. Bloody hell. I go downstairs and ignore breakfast and Minho runs after me,
"Can Teresa come round tonight *clicks tongue* or nah?" He says like the vine and I grimace at him,
"Yeah sure whatever." I answer and he cheers before running off talking to himself. He's bloody mental. I put on my shoes and then walk down the street. I get to the park and I sit down, the breeze brushing through my hair like a hand. It feels nice, the iciness, like its something that is keeping me from drifting from reality. Like they're ice claws grabbing at me pulling me into the hell which isn't fictional but real.
Even without these winds, or the polluted air which strikes my lungs, or the rain drops like little tear drops, I wouldn't be able to drift out of reality. Not with this lingering aching of loneliness and heartbreak, not with the empty void that is eating every living part of me up- like a black hole. Not with every reminder when I see a couple, not with when hear someone mention his name and it hits me like a wrecking ball. No I could never drift away.
I also guess there's a part of me which is filled with hope, hope that he'll come back, or hope that this was a nightmare, or hope that there is some reason he played the game with me. That there is a reason he broke my heart - no , crushed my soul, no there must be a stronger way of describing how I feel. Something to describe the loathing I feel towards him, for doing this, for getting me in checkmate and then winning the game.
Now here I am again, back to square one, hating Thomas. I shake my head at myself and look around, the early morning mist settling down, making everything eerie and creepy. Like there's a monster lurking in the depths of the mist, waiting for a person to walk into the mist so it can grab their leg. Listen to their screams with a smirk of a maniac plastered on their face while they rip out organs such as the heart and crush the soul. Then leave them there, bleeding, dying. That sounds a lot like Thomas to me.
I almost laugh at the thought, although, a grin is on my face, to anyone else I must look absolutely crazy.
"Newt." Whispers a familiar voice, his voice to be precise. It must be the mist, the monster of the mist, trying to draw me in, just a fictional beast. Well I thought I was fictional until it sat beside me, I look at him. I look at the big brown eyes, that still have the sparkle in them, except this time they aren't beautiful. They are evil and the specks are flames, designed to burn you to agony. His jawline and cheekbones, so defined and sharp, sharp enough to cut glass, I used to think of them attractive, now they are threatening. As if I touch them they will slice me. Then my eyes land on his lips, the once most desired part of him, not just to kiss but to feel on my skin, to feel leaving the trail of kisses and hickeys to show I was his. Now they are just poisonous, lethal even. To touch them would mean certain death.
Isn't it funny how much things have changed? I start to get up and realise I was holding my breath, I let it out and an almost smoke like cloud comes out of my mouth. He puts his hand on my arm to stop me, I bite my chapped lips and sit down,
"What?" I snap as if he's a deadly viper, an emotion, almost as if it was hurt flashes across his features but is quickly masked.
"Newt I need to explain." He starts, the desperation clearly flooding his voice like a tidal wave.
"No." I answer, he frowns,
"Newt please we don't have time. Please." He almost begs, a part of me is screaming to run, that's the fear part, the fear of being even more hurt. The fear of being taken to the Tigers den again. But then the other part, the hope part is shouting for me to listen. Well you know what someone said,

Hope, is the only thing stronger than fear.

So I huff and glare at him,
"Hurry up." I grumble and almost like relief comes across his features, it warms me a little but I deny any affection I might be feeling.
"Look, I don't want to be with her. In fact she's disgusting. She's always trying to get in my pants and it's like ew no bitch." He starts and chuckles a little at his ew no bitch which he added a stereotypical white girl Starbucks voice to. I can't fight the tiny smile that comes onto my lips so I press my lips together, an unfamiliar feeling of warmth, sparks floods my body starting from my heart.
"My dad is making me do this. I don't want to but if I don't he will do something an I didn't want to suffer or for anyone else , you, to suffer either." He continues, his eyes tearing up. He plays with his fingers as he talks, I feel bad and put my hand on top of his shaking ones,
"Tommy. It's okay." I whisper, my voice almost breaking, I don't know why. I'm scared this is an act but I want to believe it.
"No newt, treating you like I have isn't okay, how we broke up isn't okay. U can't stand what's happened between us. I can't stand her." He answers, a tear spilling down his rosy cheek, I wipe it away with my thumb and he sniffles.
"Well what do you want to do?" I ask him softly, how am I so calm and self controlling?i guess it's the hope inside of me.
"I want to be with you." He whispers, I never thought I would trust him again, I never thought I would fall for him again. But here I am, falling, and falling hard.
"I want to be with you too Tommy." I answer quietly, he looks at me,
"But we can't." He replies his voice broken, I sigh,
"What if, I was your 'friend' your dad hasn't actually met me, so he doesn't know what I look like. He doesn't know my name, so why don't we just pretend to be friends. That way we can be around each other." I suggest. Wow what. Evil newt. Oh well.
"You're a genius dude." He answers and hugs me, I smile and hesitate before hugging him back tightly. I can't believe what's happening. I don't know what's happening. Only that I think me and tommy have a chance.

AN
Heeyyyy, so first of all
YAY NEWTMAS!
What did you lot think of this chapter? Sorry it's so rushed, I'm writing it late st night of Christmas Eve. Agh. I just wanted something happy for Christmas. Sorry for it being bad spellings, I'm writing on my phone so it's harder. But yeah anyway. I wanted to write this because I wanted NEWTMAS to be baes for Christmas. Anyway

MERRY CHRISTMAS
(For tomorrow)

LOVE YA ALL
XXX