rejects // fivesauce

kelsea like a puma

doris and michael sat on his couch, bickering whether or not to watch bojack horseman. they were eating pizza, deciding to do their science work later. 

"we're watching it whether you like it or not." michael huffed propping his legs on top of her thighs and starting the show, chuckling at the opening scene. 

"i'm gonna go to the toilet." she huffed and pushed his legs off, heading upstairs for the toilet. she walked into the bathroom, squatting on the toilet with her feet on the seat. glancing outside at the scenery as the wind blew through and taking a photo for her 3 instagram followers, doris noticed someone in the photo. she squealed, falling off the toilet. as she checked the picture, she frowned, poking her head in the window as anus stood with her arms crossed in michael's driveway.

"what is going on here?" michael screeched, fly kicking the door open, not bothering to knock. he glared at doris as her pants were at her feet, her underwear still on as she looked out the window. looking out the window, his body shot down as anus looked at him, his hand going in the toilet. "ooh shit it anus."

"your hand is in my piss." doris said blankly, still peering at anus through the window. michael squealed like a chipmunk, running into the shower to rinse his whole body. "my piss is only on your hand."

"some of it splashed on me, right in my eyeball." he screeched over the water running. doris turned, seeing he was naked in the shower, her eyes widening like fucking big ass bowling balls y'know the real shiny ones yea those. "are you looking at my weiner, doris?"

michael grinned as he hopped out of the shower completely naked, his face looking like spongebob when he like 'you like krabby patties don't ya, squidward'. doris took a step back as michael chuckled, her body falling backwards, making her scream. michael yelped and grabbed her as half of her body dangled out of the window.

anus looked up to look for the sound, her eyes widening as doris hung out of the window in a shirt and underwear, and michael (who was butt naked) holding her. the two looked at her as she looked at them in disgust.

"i knew she was weird!" anus screamed, "she likes to have sex out of windows! who does that?"

"what the fuk yew talking bout." michael spat, only for anus to hear it faintly seems as all the bitch deaf.

"what?" she yelled.

"what. the fuk. are yew. talking bout." michael yelled back even louder, doris' body still hanging out of the window as he held onto her. 

"your ding dong is touching ma knee." she muttered and michael shrugged, moving, making it tickle her knee. she began to laugh. 

"why tf are your knees ticklish?" he frowned.

"what's so funny whore?" anus spat, making doris stop laughing and glare at her. 

"who you calling whore? whore." she spat back, glaring at her upside down.

"ooh shit." michael whispered, his voice going with the wind faintly.

"you're the fucking whore!" anus yelped, "having sex outside a window!"

"i ain't having sex outside a window yew fuckstain." doris spat, her face going red. not because of  anger, but because all the blood was rushing to her head as michael held her upside with his two arms and ding dong.