(#1) My Survey Dude

62 / date me

"Zach."

"Yo."

"I told Willow about Andrea."

"Really? What did she say?"

"Not much. She was pretty annoyed though."

"So now what?"

"Dunno. She knows I like her."

"And she likes you sooo go and make babies."

"Is that all you ever think about?"

"No. I also think about how much of an asshole you are."

"Wow."

"..."

"Shall I ask her out on a date?"

"Why are you asking me?"

"Because I fucking live with you, which by the way was the worst decision of my life, and because I don't know what to do."

"Ring her. Ask her to go out with you. She'll say yes and then go on a date and then make babies. Hallelujah."

"Fuck off man."

"Says the one that asked for my help."

"She still owes me a date but she's pissed at me."

"Why? You told her the truth face to face."

"No...I told her through text."

"..."

"What?"

"You're such a dickward."

"And you're not?"

"Obviously not, I'm not you."

______________________________

"Hi."

"Willow."

"Yes?"

"Doyouwanttogoonadatewithme?"

"Sorry, what?"

"Date. Me...with me."

"You want to go on a date with me?"

"You still owe me and the other day you agreed so what's stopping us?"

"Why don't you ask yourself."

"..."

"You lied to me."

"I know. I'm sorry."

"I don't know what else you've been hiding from me. It makes me wonder if you are who you say you are."

"Oh, come on, Willow. I really really like you."

"What if you still have...feelings for Andrea..."

"But I don't."

"But what if you do."

"Is this why you don't want want to go out with me?"

"..."

"Willow, one day I'm gonna come to your house and drag you out in your pyjamas just so that we can go on a date."

"You're so annoying."

"But you love it."

"Dream on."

"I don't have to dream when it's reality babe."

______________________________

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willow tree

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