(#1) My Survey Dude

*59 / go for it honey

| one and a half weeks later |

hey reese

hi

how r u

brilliant

really?

no

im sorry

im no help. i just don't know what to say

i hate seeing u so upset

it hurts

but i also hate how i can't do anything about it

babe

you've done enough

not really

yes really

how's ur dad?

ok i guess idk

he's a mess

but he's accepting it better than me

maybe because deep down he knew it would happen

i didn't

ur mum loves you

she'd hate to see u so upset

this seems over used and cliché but i promise u it will get so much easier

change of subject

ok

um

fav movie?

captain america duh

what if i told you i have both parts at home

i'm on my way

___________________________

The doorbell rings ten minutes after Reese's last text and all of a sudden I feel incredibly nervous. I quickly check my reflection in the mirror, straightening out my hair and exhaling deeply.

It's only Reese.

With a deep sigh, I open the door.

"Hey."

"Hey yourself."

He looks a mess. Dark eye bags decorate his piercing blue eyes and his hair is a complete and utter mess. It looks like he just got out of bed. But he still manages to look incredibly attractive, there's no denying it.

He's dressed in a dark grey hoodie, the sleeves slightly too long for him as his fingers peak out at the bottom.

Cool and casual.

I smile at him, opening the door wide enough for him to enter.

"Are your parents home?" He asks, making his way into the living room.

"Um, no. They're out of town, gone to meet some family." I say awkwardly, shifting on both feet.

He nods before turning to face me.

"Thank you."

"What for?" I ask, surprised by the sudden words.

"Everything," he says. "for helping me through it all. For letting me go on and on about it for days. For coming to the funeral and just being around at college. For...um, letting me cry on you..."

"You know I'd do it all over again in a heartbeat."

"I know. That's why I l-"

"..."

"...really appreciate your friendship."

I nod and then gesture to the sofa.

"Get comfortable. I'll go and get the hot chocolate."

* * *

Reese was annoyed because he missed his chance, yet again, to tell Willow how he truly felt about her. He could almost hear his mother's voice at the back of his mind:

"Go for it, honey."

The problem was, he was nervous and he hated admitting it. He was afraid of her reaction if she found out he lied to her about things. She was awfully nice to him whereas he kept things from her. He was an asshole, an incompetent person and she was the one person who made him want to be good. He wanted to be enough for her...

but at the back of his mind he knew he was f a r from it.

+ + +

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