[Bruce is online]
[Dick is online]
[Tim is online]
[Barbara is online]
[Selina is online]
[Jack is online]
[Harleen is online]
Dick: Bruce, how secure is this connection?
Bruce: Same system as the Ba-, I mean...
Dick: -.- Yay.
Barbara: Well, guess what? We now have three others joining us! Why are there so many people on here and how do they know about this chatroom?
Dick: Well, Selina is Catwoman. That’s pretty obvious.
Tim: Harleen is Harley Quinn. That’s obvious too. But who’s Jack?
Jack: Hahahaha! You will never guess who I am! Never!
Harleen: Oh, Mistah J, you’re so cute when you’re excited!
Dick: And Jack is the Joker.
Jack: Harley?
Harleen: Yes, puddin’?
Jack: ... SHUT UP!
Harleen. o.o Sorry... =c
Barbara: Well, this is just great,
[Barbara is offline]
Dick: Harley, you know you can do so much better than the Joker.
Harleen: What do you mean, pretty boy?! He’s my Mistah J! He loves me and I love him! There’s no one betta!
Jack: Actually, she’s right. She can’t do better than me.
Harleen: See?! Wait...
Jack: She’s wanted me ever since she was young.
Harleen: Are you saying I’m okay now? Are you calling me old, Mistah J? ARE YOU?!
Jack: You think I’m bad, wait ‘til you see Harley in a bad mood.
Selina: What did you actually want when you were younger?
Bruce: Yippee, so many people on here that I have the urge to spend all my money and live out the rest of my days on the street. -.-
Jack: ...
Dick: ...
Tim: ...
Barbara: ...
Selina: ...
Harleen: Why would you want to do that, Mistah W?
Bruce: Wow. This is awkward. Harley is the only one who really cares. Gosh, guys. Gosh.
Harleen: ... I don’t get it.
Jack: There’s a first time for everything.
Harleen: Was that sarcasm?
Jack: Oh, no, my dear.
Harleen: ... Was THAT sarcasm?
Jack: ... -.- You’ve gotta be kidding...
Bruce: She’s your girl.
Harleen: Yep! Forever and always.
Jack: ... Yippee.
Selina: Harley, you didn’t answer my question. What did you want when you were younger?
Harleen: I actually wanted to travel, and I get to, with Mistah J!
Selina: By any chance did you want to travel OUT OF GOTHAM?
Harleen: ...Nooo?
Selina: @.@
Harleen: @.@ Okay, maybe. Yes, I did. But I get to travel out of Go-
Selina: Arkham doesn’t count.
Harleen: Damn it.
Selina: See, you can do better than Joker. He’s just using you; you’re like a trophy to him.
Jack: A very sexy trophy, thank you.
Harleen: =#) You make me blush.
Selina: I see what you mean by she can’t do any better. O.O
Jack: Exactly.
Harleen: I’m lost.
Bruce: We know, Harley. We know.
Tim: Right. Well, my llama is hungry again.
Bruce: Tim, hold it!
Tim: O.O - (0 ).(0 ) – ( 0).( 0) (O).(O) What’s wrong?!
Bruce: ... WHERE DID YOU GET THIS LLAMA?!
[Tim is offline]
Bruce: Damnit! Where did he get his llama!... I want one.
Dick: Uh, you’re Bruce Wayne. Billionaire playboy? You could just buy one. And I don’t think Tim has a llama.
Bruce: That means... He’s lying! And yes, I know, but it’s the principle of the thing.
Dick: What principle? You want a l-
Bruce: THERE’S A PRINCIPLE.
Dick: Explain it to me th-
Bruce: Principle. There is one of those.
Dick: ...
Bruce: ... Prince.
Jack: And I thought that my family was whacked. Harley, come on. We’re logging off.
[Jack is offline]
Harleen: Cya, guys! Have fun without me!
Selina: Uh, bye Harley.
[Harley is offline]
Selina: Is it me or is that gal odd u.u
Dick: That girl is weird.
Selina: I said ‘ODD’. Not weird.
Dick: So? They’re basically the same thing.
Selina: No. They’re not. That’s like saying that cuts and slashes are basically the same thing.
Dick: Well, they pretty much-
Selina: You say it and you will have no tomorrow.
Dick: ... No, they are completely different! Completely different things!
Selina: Good boy.
Bruce: ... Hey, where’s the Baltic Sea?
Dick: Why?
Bruce: I’m looking up llamas for sale. They are being sold in the Baltic Sea.
Dick: Where near the Baltic Sea?
Bruce: No, not NEAR. IN! Gosh, no one listens to me! They are being sold in the Baltic Sea!
Selina: ... Bruce, why do you want a llama?
Bruce: I NEEDETH MY LLAMA, WOMAN! NOW REMAIN SILENT AS I SEARCH UP THE BALTIC SEA THEY SPEAK OF!
Dick: Uh, Bruce? I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t be IN the s-
Bruce: SILENCE!
Selina: Yes, Dick. Siiiilence. -.-
Dick: That’s it. I’m outta here. I hope you drown looking for you llama!
[Dick is offline]
Bruce: Ooh, there’s a llama named Fred! I want the one called Fred.
Selina: ...
[Selina is offline]
Bruce: I wonder if it’ll wear a Batman mask... “I’m Batllaman!”
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YOU ARE READING
Holy Chatroom, Batman! (Batman)
FanfictionEver wonder what Batman and his heroic gang do in their spare time (apart from Bruce 'being Batman')? Well, I've managed to hack into Batman's chat log, to see all the drama that unravels off of the superhero big screen. Love will be revealed, llama...
