[Bruce is online]
Bruce: ...I’m Batman.
[Dick is online]
Dick: I heard that!
Bruce: Don’t you have better things to do than to be online all the time?
Dick: You’re one to talk; you’re the guy who started this! And at least I’m not always saying Batman. Is that really a necessary thing to repeat?
Bruce: Yes... Because I’m Batman.
Dick: No... You’re Bruce Wayne. Right now, you’re Bruce Wayne. A few seconds from now, you will be Bruce Wayne. Only Batman... Is Batman.
Bruce: But. I’m Batman.
Dick: You are not B-
Bruce: I’M BATMAN.
Dick: Stop repeating th-
Bruce: I’M BATMAN AND YOU’D BETTER BELIEVE IT, HONEY!
Dick: Did you just... Did you just call me honey?
Bruce: O.O N-no. I didn’t.
Dick: Yes, you did. It’s right there, see? Diagonally across from the word ‘diagonally’.
Bruce: Harry Potter has nothing to do with the fact I’m Batman.
Dick: What are you talking about Ha-
Bruce: I’M BATMAN!
Dick: ... >:c
Bruce: Na... na na na...
Dick: SHUT UP. NOW. OMFG, I SWEAR TO THE LORD ALMIGHTY I WILL MURDER YOUR ASS ONE DAY!
Bruce: But not while... I’m Batman.
Dick: *eye twitches*
Bruce: I’m the Dark Knight. The Caped Crusader.
Dick: That’s it, I’ve had enough.
[Jack is online]
Jack: Hello, fellow Gothamites!
Bruce: I’m B-, who invited him?
Jack: The Dick invited me.
Bruce: Uh... ‘THE Dick’?
Dick: Ha, ha, ha, just because my name also happens to be a derogatory term for a penis.
Bruce: No, w-we would never, haha! Oh god, I can’t keep a straight face.
Jack: Now you know my problem! Hahahahaha!
Dick: -.- Seriously? You guys can stop. Like, really stop.
[Barbara is online]
[Tim is online]
[Llama is online]
Barbara: Hey guys! What’s going on?
Dick: ... These guys are douches.
Barbara: Wh-
Jack: At least we’re not ‘Dicks’!
Barbara: Heehee...
Dick: BARBARA!
Barbara: At least I didn’t type ‘Hahahahaha!’
Dick: But you did... JUST THEN!
Tim: Oh, gosh, this is too funny... I think... I think... I think I burst a blood vessel from laughing...
Dick: Fine. Go ahead. MOCK MY NAME, WHY DON’T YOU?
YOU ARE READING
Holy Chatroom, Batman! (Batman)
FanfictionEver wonder what Batman and his heroic gang do in their spare time (apart from Bruce 'being Batman')? Well, I've managed to hack into Batman's chat log, to see all the drama that unravels off of the superhero big screen. Love will be revealed, llama...
