The Fix

Chapter 17

I hated thinking negatively, but at this point I really couldn't think optimistically. I fucked up royally, but Jason never left my side. I've never met
anyone that treats me the way he treats me, cared about me the way he cares about me or, loved me the way he loves me and shows me. He was the greatest t
hing that's ever happened to me. I had to be strong for him, but more so I had to be strong for myself. I grabbed the notebook and pen and I asked Jason if he could tell the doctor that I wanted to speak with him. Once the doctor came in and I told him that I think I need to change the dosage of my medication and that I need to speak with a counselor. For the first time in a long time I was ready to do things right with them and going to a mental institution which I really don't want to go to I would do it for the level of my man in for the faith that he had in me

As bad as I didn't wanna go I knew that it was the right thing to do so I would be better after the doctor explained everything he walked out leaving me & Jason alone we sat in silence for awhile before Jason spoke. "Look Elise I Know That You're Scared & I Know That You Don't Wanna Do This But Just Know That I'll Be With You Every Step Of The Way." I smiled cause no man has ever been there for me like Jason has been they always left when they found out bout the problems I have but he's stuck by side through everything, Jason was right I really didn't wanna do this I just wanted to go home but I knew that I needed this more than anything in order for me to live a normal life it was still hard for me to speak I sighed & grabbed the notebook & I begin writing I want a family when I'm better what do you say? I tapped Jason & handed him the notebook he smiled as he read what I wrote then he looked & said. "Anything For You But For Now Get Some Sleep." I smiled as Jason kissed my forehead then I drifted off to sleep I begin to dream bout my past & all the men I've come across then Charlie popped into to my head. "You're Gonna Pay For What Your Brother Did To Me You Can't Get Rid Of Me That Easy Bitch." I woke up in a cold sweat Wtf I can't do this I can't I'm sorry no one will make me.