"IN CONCLUSION, MEW MEW KISSY CUTIE 2 IS NEITHER KISSY NOR CUTIE. IT'S TRASH. ZERO STARS."
"Actually," says Garlic Girl, "I think some of the characters saw great development, especially towards the end."
"WELL, I SUPPOSE EVERYONE IS ENTITLED TO THEIR OWN OPINION," Mettaton replies. "EVEN IF THAT OPINION IS WRONG."
I wince and wait for Garlic Girl to be erased, but apparently Mettaton is in a good mood today.
"NOW, CLASS," he says, "TODAY WE ARE GOING TO BE WATCHING A VIDEO."
Everyone jumps up and down and screams with joy.
"ABOUT ME."
Everyone sits down and unscreams. When are we going to learn about biology?
The video doesn't even have any words. It's just a slideshow of Mettaton doing different poses. Who knew there were eighty types of headshot? Also, some of the pictures say #nofilter, even though multiple edits have clearly been made.
Then, suddenly, there's a video of his neighbour's colonoscopy. It's green. I guess that's our biology for today...
"NOW I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU A QUIZ ABOUT WHAT YOU JUST SAW. READ THE QUESTIONS AND ANSWER THEM IN SILENCE."
He hands out a sheet of paper to everyone in the class. It's blank.
"Um, there's nothing on this," I tell him as he hands a piece of paper to me.
"WELL, THERE ISN'T ENOUGH MONEY IN THE BUDGET FOR INK." He draws a picture of a dragon on my "quiz" and then moves on.
We spend the next few minutes guessing the answers before he collects the papers in.
"I WILL GRADE THESE TONIGHT WHILE I BATHE IN OIL. IF YOU SCORE BELOW 40%, YOU WILL BECOME AN UNPERSON. GOODBYE, BEAUTIES."
He leaves through the door this time. No one thinks to call the police so we just silently leave for break. I accidentally step in the pile of ashes that was the old man from yesterday, because the cleaners are slackers. Hopefully my guesses were enough to save my life today.
YOU ARE READING
Once Upon a Girl
Short StoryShe was just a small town girl... After randomly finding herself displaced from her normal life and into a midwestern family, Sunita is trying to adjust to a brand new high school. Can she survive the dramas of teenage life? Note: this book is a par...
