Oasis (A KaiSoo Fanfic)

Chapter 21 | Eye Cancer

Over time, it's only inevitable that people change. Whether it be their appearance or their personality, people change because that's what Nature demands. Change. It happens whether it's wanted or not and evidently, getting an operation that completely eradicates your sense of vision only speeds up the course of Change.

Change came to Kyungsoo faster than anyone could have predicted. He stayed confined to his room more often than usual and no longer wanted to roam the halls or socialize with anyone. He just wanted to stay in bed all day, except when it came time to eat or go to therapy, but even then sometimes he would get exempt. There were times when his new lethargic attitude scared me because one minute I would look over and his eyes would be open and the next they would be closed, in which case I would have to scurry over to his bed and put his oxygen tubes in.

Sometimes, when I would sit there and watch him, I couldn't help but think to myself, It's official. The Kyungsoo I fell in love with is gone. I would think and the more I thought the more I realized he was becoming like me: a friend of Depression and I didn't want that for him. That's why I told myself that giving up on him was not an option. I refused to just drop him when he needed someone the most, even of he wouldn't say that with words. I refused to let him die unhappy.

This sudden change in him was partially what caused me to be so surprised when he asked for a rather adventurous, if you will, favor. "You want me to what?" I asked once more for reassurance that I was hearing him correctly.

"Take me up to the roof," he deadpanned seriously. "I want to go up to the roof and I want you to take me."

I looked around, my eyebrows deeply furrowed. "B-But hyung," I stuttered, "do you know how much trouble we could get into for that? I mean, I'm lucky your doctors let you stay with me and if I take you up to the roof, especially in your wheelchair, god only knows what they'll do."

"Since when are you so afraid of a few doctors' opinions on how to live and spend time?" he retorted, his major point aiming and hitting me right in the heart. I opened my mouth to speak, but he cut me off. "And don't say that it would be a waste because I can't see anything, I know I can't." I closed my lips and fell silent. "Jongin, I don't think I ask for much from you or anyone, especially after my operation. So, please, can you for once just forget about the rules and my safety and just do this for me?" A few stinging and salty tears threatened my eyes as I stared at the blank look on his face and in his eyes. Even when he couldn't see, his gaze was my one weakness.

"Fine," I said, giving in with a little sigh.

He smiled faintly at me. "Thank you," he said, to which I only nodded my head. I quickly put on a coat and shoes before walking behind his wheelchair, pushing it with my trembling hands out the door. No one really asked questions as we made our way down the hall toward the elevator, I guess because they were all so used to seeing me with Kyungsoo by that time. I kept my hands wrapped firmly around the black handles as we went up to the very top floor of the hospital, my anxious eyes watching the line of numbers above me in fear that it would suddenly stop to let people on, maybe even doctors. But, fortunately for my racing heart, we made it up without any interruptions. I guess it was a slow day in the hospital.

The hard part came when we were faced with a flight of stairs, otherwise known as my sworn arch-enemies. I can just remember as a teenager in the hospital, trying to climb those stairs was the hardest thing for me. By the time I had finished one flight, the wheelchair abandoned by the flight, I felt as if my lungs were desperately hanging on to the last breath of air in the world. But back then, the only difference was that I was only climbing those stairs for myself and not for Kyungsoo.

My chest was heaving and my heart was about ready to punch me by the time we made onto the roof. I don't think I've ever been so grateful for small flights of stairs since that day. I led him over to a spot in front of the roof's edge, but not too close, and stood beside him as I tried to catch a breath or two.