The New Girl

{41} Candygrams, cups, and confidence

Wednesday.

The line of students seemed to take forever.  In the morning it was a big deal to buy the candygrams.  I'm rushing here before class to get them, with Kathryn by my side.  A smile creeped on my face realizing it's getting to the Christmas season.  It will be so fun with all my new friends.

I stepped towards the table and handed the teacher enough money for 9 candycanes.  Hopefully that'd be enough for my good friends.  Kathryn did the same and we sat on the ground against the wall.  I took a pen out of my bookbag.  

"Is that for Will?…" I laughed and nudged Kathryn's shoulder.

Kathryn grinned and wrote his name with hearts around it.  Basically, you buy a candycane…write who it's to and from (unless you want to be a "secret admirer") and the person will receive it later.  Who doesn't love getting little gifts from people?  I'm deciding to just send all mine the first day they're selling.  

"Are you sending one to Niall?" Kathryn asked awkwardly.

My face dropped.  Of course I will.  Will he send me one though?  Something needs to happen soon.  We can't just keep being like this.  It's not how Niall and I are.  

"Well yeah, I will.  Have you heard then?" I said quietly and filling out the next candygram to Chelle.

"I think most people have, you ok?" Kathryn questioned.

Everyone stared at each other for a long time.  I felt so much pressure on myself.  Literally like the whole world was staring at me and trying to get me to say something.  But I couldn't.  I was frozen.  And behind Zayn.

Niall rushed out first.  I was supposed to meet him after school, yet somehow I got caught up wtih Zayn.  How will I explain?  

I continued to feel horrible because Harry left the room too.  Chelle ran after him.  Then it was a chain reaction.  Holland and Lou chased after everyone else.  No one stayed with me.  Besides Zayn obviously.  And now I truly don't know what to do.

I cringed remembering what happened.  I shook it out of my head and knew the best thing I could do was fix it.  Kathryn's eyes still watched me closely so I had to reply.

"Uh, Chelle gave me a lot of shit about it later that night.." I chuckled.

"Sounds just like her." Kathryn smiled slightly.

Chelle was joking around with me, how I'm turning into her.  I don't think she's mad at me..  This whole thing doesn't have anything to do with her luckily.  I just don't know what'd I do if Chelle hated me.  I would say the same thing about Niall...but I'm afraid he actually does.  

We finished our little candygrams.  I wrote one out to everyone I'm close to.  That even includes the people who ran out of the room yesterday.  I care about them so much!  But I keep getting stuck in the wrong situations...Which needs to stop, immediately!

Kathryn and I put all our candycanes into the box, to deliver them in a couple nights.  We did it just in time though because it was almost time for my history class.  Luckily, none of my friends are in that class.  I need time to think and relax.  I have a feeling I won't get that for a while this week.