One In A Million

Chapter 57 Part 2

20/04/2015

"Marco's POV"

"Finally, I can breathe again. Today was my last day of treatment and physio, gosh, I thought I never would get out of this long tunnel, seeing no light. Of course, I'm thankful to the team of doctors who looked after me with a special attention, and mostly to my personal Physiotherapist Thomas who has given my abductors the best of the treatment , a quiet speedy recovery, this guy ist der best. I can't even dare to imagine what would my life be without him. Hopefully, my abductor won't betray me again, well on this one, I'm the one who to be blamed for this stupid injury, I simply didn't have to bluster myself at how good I am at jumping. Let's say I did earn a lesson from it. Even my sisters and parents agreed on the fact that I did contributed to this self injury, oh gosh... "Think twice before undertaking such actions my mom has yelled at me, gosh, for a second, I thought to be grounded, it was so close of that. "

"I'm feeling so fit and alive again, so ready to play football, I'm having the intense passion running in my blood, this eager excitement to have the football ball at my feet, I just don't want to wait another day. I'm praying for Kloppo to add my name to the players list for Saturday's home game. I have to be there, I have to play in my home stadium, my favorite place in this whole damn world. I feel the urge for my feet to touchdown the grass at the Westfalenstadion, such a sacred momentum. Now the decision rest only on coach if I'm fully disposed to take part in the training and foremost in head of Saturday's game. Damn, how I hate to be dependent on that way on a decison, as if my life was hanged by a thread."

"But the awaiting answer isn't just the reason for my gloomy mood, beside football and injury, my private life is entirely making me feel downcast. Sometimes, it hurts me more than any other physical injuries I've encountered. I don't fucking know where am I directing at, what is the goal of my silly actions, what the hell am I doing. It has to come to an final end, I don't wanna do this anymore, I wanna leave this immoral style of life I've build up lately. I'm so done with girls, sex, and the other horrible things I done. Sometimes, when I'm alone, I'm self questioning, "where has your conscience gone mate.", but I'm clueless, with no answers. Shame is a meaningless word to mark out my actions.

"My personal management team caught wind of my nasty behavior, of course, how they wouldn't, not later than yesterday, the shitty Bild has published a picture of me accompanied by Lorena entering this restaurant in Munich, something that happened three weeks ago, shit!! Having every of his movements watched thoroughly by shitty paparazzis is a matter I cope hardly with. My manager has been questioning me, like if I was a fucking criminal. As a management team, their job was to protect me, and create a perfect neat image of me, for the public eyes. Therefore, based on the series of inadequate behavior, I have been proposed two radical solution, the first one to make of Lorena my potential girlfriend, the official one, or to get me a girl, a sort of PR relation, that I would be given a catalogue, and my choice would be theirs. To please them, I thumbed onto the dumb catalogue, and of course the models were really gorgeous, but no, I stood firm in my concept, I never agree to take part such machiavelous masquerade or PR relation, and never it gonna change, like seriously. Yes, it got them pissed off at me, but that's my private life, and it doesn't concern them in any points. PR relations and related shitty stuffs of this kind, damn, like WTF!! I'm a big boy, and mature enough to handle the situation, if it got to turn into a scandal, then I'll manage it, as long as my family don't get implied in that storm hit, I'll be okay. I will anything to keep them off my shits."

"It's always during such jittery moments that I curse the only and one person responsible woman, Brooke, responsible for that dirty mess. If only she hadn't gone so abruptly, if she hadn't engender that emptiness in my life, if she didn't come back with such facility, mostly with the dumbest excuse "I did that to protect you", my ass. Why did she even make a come back. Fuck, I am left in a total confusion, unaware if my heart's still beating for her, or has the anger has completely withdraw free my heart of any compassion. Have I reach the point of non return for being incapable to stettle this critical question to know if I still love her or not. Or perhaps that I know the truth already but don't want to admit it, because of that broken heart."

• • • • • • • • • • •

Depleted of any sensations to step at another party thrown by Auba, Marco opted for a stroll at the Phöenix See Marina. He recently turned down each of the party invitations, and everything that had a linkage with festivities, as if he couldn't hear of them, like he had just enough. Parties didn't bring him any amusement anymore, but a nasty bitter taste in mouth.

Marco reached the Marina, his arms bented over the security rail, he starred far, far away from him, into an infinite tunnel of darkness, almost as his eyes had an ability to see through it. He sighed heavily, allowing his mind taking a break, a moment of relaxation he had been searching over a long time already. During his mediation, flashes of him and Brooke walking at this same place shown up to his mind. Marco remembered how they were enjoying a walk at the Phöenix See after eating dinner, he perfectly had in mind her favorite places. The remembrance of those cute moments even brought a smile to his lips, something he thought had vanished forever. Actually, he didn't believe that he smiled, was it a miracle. As he savoured the light wind breeze, the phone into the pocket of his jean never ceased of vibrating. This instantly made Marco to roll his eyes with annoyance, he knew what it was. But just as a precaution, he decided to look at his screen, and who the caller was, perhaps it was his mom, his father, or one of his sisters calling to check on him.

As he grabbed his phone, a heavy breath noise full of exasperation came out. Just at reading her name on his screen made his blood to fizz. This girl, Lorena, had tried to reach several times since that morning, with a ten thousands of missed calls, and a countless number of messages. His inbox could explode at any moment. A result of this heavy traffic on his phone made his Iphone to freeze. "What a pain in the ass..." Marco mumbled in between his lips, as he felt his irritation would cross the line of decency at any time. He tried with all of his strength to contain that anger, but Lorena's obstination didn't arrange his mood. Marco pressed the red call reject button, but the moment of tranquility didn't last, as a few seconds later, her name appeared once again. Unable to hold back that wrath, he threw with a strenuous arm gesture his phone to the water. As his phone instantly faded into the depth of the dark water, he felt that heaviness on his chest slowly dissipating as well. "Amen..." Marco pronounced with a bit of sarcasm. Afterall, he had other Iphones, so throwing this one effortlessly wasn't a matter to him. This one contained only porn stuffs, and the contacts of the sassy girls he used to enjoy, nothing of very sacred. Every pics with his family, of private stuffs. His cutie Nico, Brooke, yes he still had her pics, were preciously saved on his other iphone.

But a matter never came along without other coming all the way down. The aim of that walk at this specific place full of intense memories, a place full with emotions was pretty specific. Marco couldn't kept it any longer in his house, if he moved into his new apartment, it surely wasn't with the intention of allowing those memories or objects of the past to haunt his new sanctuary.

Marco brought out of the pocket the baby blue colored box from Tiffany's, instantly the melancholy grabbed him from his throat, slowly infecting every of his body. He had not the strength to open and stare at the gorgeous ring for a last time. He thought to himself that sinking the ring there would be so easier, as it used to be their place. That ring was the last thing which related him to Brooke, and ever since he understood that never she'd come back, getting rid of the precious diamond object was the absolute only way to free his mind from that continuous torpor.

He examined the box attentively, feeling the temptation of opening it rising inside his mind, took a deep breath and remained speechless shortly. "OMG Brooke, why you did that to me, we would be so happy, this ring was supposed to be yours... I'm so tired of living with that pain of my heart, so tired of everything... I don't want to live only on fragments of our memories.... all I want is..." Marco whimpered under his breath, with the tears falling down his face. He couldn't find the inner strength enough to finish his phrase, the sadness had entirely striked him with a violent force. Fighting this resentment wasn't an option.

On the verge of tossing the box at the water, something was inevitably warding him off from doing this ultimate move. "I can't... I can't even throw this ring... damn Brooke... what am I supposed to do now."