One In A Million

Chapter 14

19/08/2014

Brooke's POV

"5 days. 5 days have gone since the last time that I have seen Marco at Starbucks. 5 days ago he has tried so hardly to convince me to go out for a dinner, and Of course I refused it. I was so mad at him, so mad for the way he insisted, mad because he lied, and mostly sad because i felt I have been betrayed. How could he has done this to me, why. Am I just a trophy that he wants to add to his already golden collection of his, was it just a game. Yes it must have been that. Marco is not only a player on a football ground, but a fucking golden playboy, using girls for his own pleasure, making them trust and believe him, like he did with me, and then throw them like a dirty trash. For now, that's the bad image I'm having on him, a fucking blonde playboy. And what's the most annoying, bothering me, is that I cannot forget this moment we shared at the party, when we kissed, sometimes I still can feel our lips being connected, or his thin lips on mine. I know I'm not supposed to have such thoughts, certainly after what happened next, but still, I'm trying so hard to put this in my mind, using this sort of hate and anger I have towards him as an excuse to forget him. Yes, that's it, I tried so hard to forget, but all my efforts resulted as a failure. There has not been a day, even at work, I couldn't focus correctly on my daily duties. My mind constantly wandering about Marco. The same thing at night, all these previous nights seemed the same, unable to find sleep, and only being able to think of him and only him. He has called me several times, and send me a LOT of text messages, begging me to reply his phone calls, but all I kept on doing was to reject them, and immediately delete all the messages after reading them. Kaylee who was there, she has read every messages that Marco has sent me, seeking for my forgiveness. She only said, that I should listen to my heart and only that, not my brain. Because the heart was never wrong, he will always tells you what to do and take a better decision. I would lie if I say that I was not confused, because yeah, obviously I was. Confused and lost with mixed feelings of affection and hate towards Marco. Why was everything so complicated in my life, why can't I be happy just for once. Sometimes I think someone must have threw me a black voodoo spell or something like that to be that always unlucky, or maybe that it was simply my life destined to be that way. In life, certain people are lucky, while some aren't, and I'm sure I must be one of them, always having to fight my shit and ass off to have a descent social life. Hopefully I had beautiful friendly people surrounding me, Julia, Kaylee, Jason my awesome half German Australian friend who has helped me to get the nice apartment I live in and the job. As I know, your good people can fill all of your needs, well most of them, and for me it was enough. Julia and Kaylee really did their best to make me feel better, at least to put a smile on my face, but it was hard. On Saturday, we went to this new night club in town "The Blue Vibes", it was really nice. The music and everything, but I did not enjoy myself at all. All I did was to keep on thinking about Marco and only him. I really tried hard to focus on some cute and sexy guys that were around us, but nothing worked out. I was just too negative with myself, and my mind couldn't detached of the thoughts I had of Marco. Maybe that I was so mad and disgusted, but I was missing Marco, yes I really did. Or was it just some chemical reactions in my brain that made me feel this way, damn my mind was so disorganized. I didn't know myself what I really wanted. I wanted Marco but my anger was ruining everything."

---- Today, was quite calm at work, just a few clients came to buy some perfumed soaps and a few body lotions, as we were on a sales week. It was always during those times that we would have a major amount of customers, and some an increase in our benefits. But still, it was pretty calm. I looked at the computer screen clock, showing 12:15 PM, meaning that in fifteen minutes I would have my lunch break, and yes I was so hungry. Just thinking about the delicious cheese macaroni I brought sharpened my hunger. I also remember that I had received a few text messages earlier but I couldn't check them, as I was busy with the client. So I grabbed my phone, unlocked the screen and read the two messages left from Kaylee and Julia, but also had a look at the Instagram notifications, I was really curious to found out what it was, as I have not been so much active on it. The last picture I posted was the one I had with my girls at the club on Saturday. Pressing the notification icon on my screen, I was very surprised to see I gained four new followers, and I immediately recognized them, their faces yes. They were all of the four guys that came to talk to me on Saturday, proposing me to dance on the dance floor, or to have a drink, but all I kept on doing was to reject their offers. One of them dared to comment my picture with the comment "@brookealless was the hottest in this club ;)" I read the comment, and just smile, as it wasn't having any effects on me. And of course, I so did not followed back these guys, I hoped that they would unfollow me later, seeing that I wont show any signs of interest with them. Still reading my notifications, something else intrigued me, that mention from Kaylee. It was a video where a friend of her's thrown a bucket of ice and water, and damn, she was feeling so cold. I watched attentively the video, and damn, I just came to realized that she has nominated me to do the same thing. I already knew what this Ice Bucket Challenge was, but never did it. But this time, it was different, as my good friend nominated me, and she really insisted, saying "Brooke I count on you." Oh gosh, I knew I couldn't avoid it, just thinking about the idea of the iced water gave me chills. I typed a short comment on her video "Challenge Accepted Girl." Oh Kaylee, what a funny and crazy girl, the was the craziest one of our girl group, and such an wonderful girl. She left on yesterday night, and I was already missing her, our girly nights at talking about random stuffs, about Leonardo DiCaprio, who will be his next girl friend after Toni Garn, we were totally fangirling over him, and we didn't care what other would think about our behavior. We were cray cray. I looked at my Instagram feed, checking my "Favorite Celebrities" news, and new pics they posted, pressed several time the heart like button, and left a comment on Tyra Banks pic, saying how I always admired her, because yeah I always. While my fingers were busy at typing, Marco's name and number appeared on the screen, making me stop my fingers movement in a sudden. I took deep breath in and let out all the sort of anxiety that was poisoning my body and mind. My hands were cold, and began to uncontrollably shale by themselves, as my hearting beats were accelerated. The more I was looking at his name "Blondi Woodi" the more I was nervous. My hands wanted to do the move, to slide the call bar to the greeen side of the screen, but mu brain wasn't allowing them to do so, And mostly I so wasn't ready to hear his voice, even though that I was missing it. Maybe I would later, but not now, My feelings were still stabbed by his lies. So in a rush, I pressed the reject button, seized the shop key, my bag, and made my way out of the shop, as my lunch time was so close. I tried to refresh my mind and think on other stuffs, rather than Marco, yes, something like the Ice Bucket Challenge I will have to do, and text Jason, my Aussie friend, to invite him to come over for a dinner.  I haven’t seen him for a while.