Sorry

twenty five

abia kamin

Knowing that Mateo was right upstairs made all my appetite go away. Rowan had made an entire breakfast for me that I couldn't finish without feeling like I was going to vomit.

"I think I'm ready to go now. Can you please take me home?" I kindly asked him, leaving the dining table. I grabbed a lunch container to put my leftovers in. I felt rude for not finishing, but my stomach was doing flips.

"Abia," Rowan stood up, coming into the kitchen.

"I don't want to see him. I can't." I was being dramatic. But I was blaming the hormones. I took his plate and washed it along with mine.

"Happy to know I have that affect on you," Mateo smiled a devilish smile when he entered the kitchen. I avoided eye contact but could hear him grabbing a drink from the fridge.

I looked at Rowan, gesturing with my eyes that we needed to leave. But he was using his eyes to tell me that I needed to talk to him. "He doesn't bite, Abia. Just talk to him," he leaned down with his lips brushing my ear. With his hand going on my waist, he pushed me in Mateo's direction. I didn't need to start the conversation because he did it for me.

"Are you having the baby?" Mateo set his glass of orange juice down and looked at me with the same cold eyes that he did yesterday.

"Of course she is. What kind of question is that?" Rowan got defensive but Mateo's face revealed how uninterested he was in hearing Rowan's opinion.

"You can't," Mateo stared me down. I crossed my arms. "Do you know what having that baby means?"

"I'm aware."

"Then you know the witches will take it away from you as soon as you have it. You know your parents will start an uncalled for war in this town? Don't have the baby and they-"

"They already know," I cut him off before he could continue any further with his nonsense. The fact that he was suggesting I have an abortion really pissed me off. If he didn't want to be involved in my child's life then he could just say that. He dragged a hand down his face. "I don't see why it matters to you anyway. You don't think it's yours. Apparently you think I just go around sleeping with men," I argued, the hurt being evident in my voice. We weren't in an official relationship, but I never even batted an eye at anyone other than Mateo.

"That's not why I asked the question. I just forgot, okay? I forgot that vampires can have offspring with witches. If I had known then I would have used protection." I couldn't tell if this was his way of apologizing. But I wasn't going to accept anything other than the words 'I'm sorry.' I know Mateo is too prideful to ever let those words leave his lips.

"Well, I'm having this baby whether you like it or not. And I'm not going to say that you can choose to be in her life or not, because I don't want you in it at all."

I didn't mean those words. But I was hurt. I was sad that he left me, but now I'm just angry. Angry that he could just leave me so easily, especially when I needed him most. I hoped that I would not regret my words because in this moment they're exactly what I was feeling. Especially because I hated this version of Mateo.

"If that's what you want," his voice was quiet as he shrugged. That's not what I wanted to hear from him. I wanted to hear him beg and apologize. But Mateo is a prideful person. A small bit of my heart was crumbled. The small part of it that hoped that he wasn't only back but wanted to stay and be there for me and my baby.

"I'll walk home."

"No it's fine, I'll drive you," Rowan said and I put my hand up to stop him. I need time to think and the hour long walk would be good for me.