Just the two of us (book 2)

Chapter 64 Anger

I wake up and I feeling so alone again, my sadness has now turned into anger towards Marshall. How can he leave me like this at the hospital with all I just been through? How can he treat me like this when now is the time I need him the most? I don't wanna do this anymore, I don't wanna be with him when he leaves me when it's worst.
It was nice having Deshaun here yesterday and he promised to talk to Marshall, I know that Marshall thinks I broke up with him, but that shouldn't be a reason for him to stay away? I'm so deeply disappointed in him right now, this isn't the Marshall I know. It now knocks on my door and even though I'm angry with Marshall, then I really hope that it's him, mostly because I have some of my anger to serve him, but in walks Mona.
"Are you good?" She asks me.
"Yeah." I say smiling and she closes the door behind her.
"I hoped to see Marshall here." She says as she knows how much I want him here, but she doesn't know how much I despise him right now.
"Well.. Apparently he's a coward." I sigh as I look down at my hands.
"Something changed." Mona says and sits down next to me.
"Deshaun was here yesterday." I say and I now look at her. "Marshall thinks I broke up with him so that's why he's staying away."
"Well.. Then it's just a big misunderstanding." Mona smiles as she apparently doesn't get where I'm going with this.
"He doesn't even wanna fight for us, he was the one who pushed it too far so he should be man enough to come back and solve everything out." I explain to her.
"Maybe he's scared." Mona says which I think is bullshit.
"He shouldn't leave me here no matter what." I begin to cry. "I've been through enough and even if I did break up with him then he should be here as a friend." Mona now takes my hand probably trying to comfort me, but it feels like the last hope for me having a better future just disappeared.
"Maybe he just needs time to process all this Amelia, I see these things happen often to couple who goes through things like this." Mona says but I don't believe her, I don't believe Marshall needs time. What does he need time for? He wasn't the one who was beaten and nearly raped!
"I just wanna go home to New York." I cry.
"I feel you sweetie." She says and there's a couple of minutes of silence. "Are you having any visitors today?" She breaks the silence.
"I don't know." I sigh. I don't know anything, I don't know who visits me, I don't know who's there for me, I don't know what the fuck I'm gonna do, I don't know where to go when I get released from the hospital, I just wanna go home to New York.
"Well I'm here till 5 so just call me if you need anything." Mona says and gets up. I know she has other patients and she can't sit here talking to me for hours.
"I will." I say smiling so she doesn't feel so bad about leaving me .

Most of the morning I just watch tv as I can't really do anything else and suddenly it knocks on my door, I don't even think or hope it's Marshall anymore because I'll just get disappointed then. Lucas and Tasha walks through the door with a box of my favorite chocolate and some flowers, I can't help but smile of their generous gesture as I'm so tired of the hospital's "snacks".
"Hi guys." I say and they each comes over and give me a big hug.
"How are you feeling?" Tasha asks me as they both sit down.
"I'm still in pain but else I'm fine." I say smiling. "I'm just tired of laying here."
"You're getting released tomorrow, right?" Lucas asks and I just nod my head. I have no idea where to go tomorrow, other than I know that I have to go home to Marshall and grab my things and then I need a place to stay until I can get a ticket home to New York, which is pretty difficult without money. "Have Marshall been here today?" Lucas asks. I don't know if they know about me and Marshall's fight as they weren't here yesterday.
"No." I just say.
"Sharonda told me that you and Marshall got into a fight the other night." Tasha then says.
"Yeah." I sigh. I know that they wanna know what's going on but I'm just so exhausted from all the worrying but I also get so tired of this medication.
"Haven't he been by since?" Tasha asks me.
"No." I almost whisper because it gets to me, I can constantly feel this disappointment.
"So where are you standing?" Lucas asks.
"He thinks we're done so let him think that, since he doesn't wanna fight for it then he can stay away which he obviously does anyway." I say.
"Why does he think you're done? What the fuck happened man?" Lucas asks confused.
"I'm sure Sharonda already informed Tasha about everything, since that's what she does." I say and I look away. I'm not trying to start a situation but my mood is just really bad and I'm tired of bullshit, besides I can already hear how Sharonda made this sound like, I'm probably the bitch who broke Marshall's heart once again and I'm probably playing him because I don't wanna move into together.
"What the fuck Amelia? That statement was unnecessary." Tasha says and I can feel that she's trying to hide her anger. I look at her and she looks angry, but I know I'm right, I'm sure that Sharonda already made her own story out of this.
"Am I wrong?" I ask Tasha.
"She just told me that you and Marshall got into a fight and when Deshaun went over and visited Marshall, Marshall had trashed the place man." Tasha tells me but I don't believe her so I begin to laugh in sarcasm from her lie. "Amelia I'm really trying to control myself because of your situation here but.."
"I don't need your fucking sympathy." I cut her off as I give her dead glare. I guess that all this anger towards her isn't gone after all because it pisses me off that she defends her once again. "So if you got anything to say Tasha then say it."
"Yo girls.." Lucas tries to speak but it's impossible for him to get a word in.
"What the fuck is your problem?" Tasha now asks.
"My problem is that you never hung around bitches who fucking gossiped, my problem is that you have known me for so fucking long and maybe I wasn't good at staying in contact but you know me, still you believed Sharonda's bullshit, you let her inside your head and change your opinions about me, you believed every single thing she told you considering that she had never met me and you had been friends with me for years!" I now burst out.
"Maybe you should have this fucking discussions with your man, Sharonda didn't get her informations from strangers." Tasha says.
"I know that she heard some things from Marshall but she also gave the stories some twists." I say.
"Solve your fucking beef with Sharonda because I'm done being in the middle of this shit." Tasha says as she leans back in the chair. What doesn't she understand? It doesn't solve anything that she backs away from this feud, she put herself in the middle of it by taking Sharonda's site.
"You brought this on yourself because you were taking Sharonda's site." I inform her.
"We weren't even friends Amelia!" She raises her voice now.
"I would have defended you in anytime even though we weren't speaking!" I fight back.
"Yeah because you weren't the one who had been pissed on." She says.
"I thought you were done arguing about this." Lucas now says which makes Tasha give him a look which tells him to shut up. There's a minute of very awkward silence before Lucas then speaks again. "I just wanna know what went down between you and Marshall."
"Long story short, Marshall asked me to move in with him and when I said no he got really angry, then we got into an argument, I asked him to leave and he took it as I broke up with him." I explain.
"What are you gonna do tomorrow then?" He asks.
"I don't know. I don't have any money to get home to New York so I don't know what to do." I say.
"Marshall is gonna pick you up tomorrow, he knows that you don't have anywhere else to go right now, so it would surprise me if he didn't pick you up tomorrow." Tasha says.
"You heard that from Sharonda too?" I give her an attitude because I'm still not done bitching about it. I admitted I was wrong so why can't she admit that she did something wrong as well?
"I'm done." Tasha says and she gets up from the chair and leaves my room.
"That was unnecessary." Lucas sighs.
"Can't you see she did some things wrong as well?" I ask him.
"Of course but you should talk about it instead of making dumbass comments." Lucas says.
"I'm just tired of people bullshitting me Lucas." I say.
"So is Tasha." He says. "You both feel hurt and fucked over but you gotta make it right with each other, you're putting me in a shitty situation here man."
"It just feels like everything is falling apart." I begin to cry now.
"I know.."
"No you don't Lucas." I cut him off. "First I leave Kevin and then he fucking ribbed my off, I lost everything I had worked for but it was amazing that I could finally be with Marshall, but it's all so damn complicated with him and I knew it would be, but it would be easier to handle the problems if there wasn't 20 other problems and now I found out that it was not even worth it because he doesn't wanna fight for it, he can't even be here as my friend, he can't even be here when I need him the most." Lucas just sits there and look at me because I guess that he didn't expect me to feel this way about this whole me and Marshall situation. "I feel so powerless." I say with tears running down my face.
"Amelia I've never seen two people love each other so much as you and Marshall love each other, I've never seen a couple being more perfect for each other. I know that you're disappointed that he's not here but you also know how easily Marshall can feel rejected and how he reacts when he gets rejected." Lucas says and it feels like he's defending Marshall which I don't understand, no matter how you look at then him being here is not okay.
"Lucas, I was nearly raped a couple days ago so he should just stop being so fucking selfish and be here for me." I hiss.
"I agree." He says which makes me roll my eyes.
"Besides if he loved me then he wouldn't stay away." I say. Lucas doesn't say anything as he knows that I'm right. There's a moment of silence before I speak again. "I promise to talk shit out with Tasha before I go home to New York." Lucas is right, it's not fair to put him in this situation as me and Tasha have put him in right now, we used to be best friends so we should definitely be able to talk things out.
"I appreciate that." He says as he offers me a smile.
"Now go find your lady." I say smiling.
"Are you sure? I can stay if you want." Lucas says.
"No this medication makes me so tired anyway so I need to sleep." I say smiling.
"Alright, do you want me to come by tomorrow in case that Marshall doesn't show up?" He asks me.
"Yeah do that." I say smiling. Lucas get up and gives me a kiss on the cheek.
"I'll see you tomorrow sis." He says before he leaves.

I wake up by the sound of someone knocking on my door, I look at the clock and it's 7pm, damn I've slept the whole day away. I look at the door and I see Jake with a plate of food, he doesn't wear his uniform and he looks really good as usual.
"The nurses told me that you haven't ate since this morning so I thought I would grab a plate of food now that I'm here." He says as he walks towards my bed.
"Thank you so much." I say. Jake places the plate on the table which he drives over to me and then he drags the tabletop over my bed.
"Is it good for you there?" He asks to be sure that the tabletop is in its perfect position.
"It's perfect." I say and look down on the plate, it looks really delicious with some pork, potatoes and some vegetables.
"How are you?" He asks when I begin to eat.
"I'm getting released tomorrow." I say and I be sure that I've swallowed my food before I answer.
"That's good." He says. "I thought Marshall would be here."
"Me too." I mumble.
"Is everything okay between you?" Jake now asks concerned.
"I don't think we're together anymore." I sigh and I stuff my mouth with food.
"What? What happened?" Jake frowns.
"We got into a fight the day before yesterday where I asked him to leave and I haven't seen him since." I say.
"Shit that doesn't sound good." He sighs.
"No but I would really prefer not to talk about it because people who was here kept asking about it and I'm just so tired to talk about it." I admit.
"It's fine." He says smiling. "We'll talk about something else."
"It's a shame that we didn't get along in high school." I say smiling. I actually think that Jake is really sweet and I remember I thought the same thing before we became "enemies".
"That's was my own fault." He chuckles. "I was such a fucking bitch because I couldn't have you."
"I don't get why you found me that interesting because I remember you told me that I was so closed and that it only gave people something to talk about." I say.
"Not to talk about how violent you were." He jokes which makes me slap his arm playfully.
"I just had a temper." I laugh. It's the first day I've been laughing in two days.
"You certainly had." He chuckles. "But I guess that I liked that you were closed and a little troubled because it made you mysterious."
"I think it was a good thing that I went to college in Cali, it definitely matured me a lot and even though I had love for Detroit and all the people here, then it was a good thing that I came off the streets." I explain to him. It was a hard decision for me back then but I wouldn't had grown as the person I am today if I had stayed in Detroit.
"I think too." Jake agrees.
"Have you never ever wanted to leave Detroit?" I ask him now. I remember many of us had dreams about leaving Detroit but for some reason people never do it. Just look at Marshall, he's so rich and he still can't leave this city, people here has so much love for this city for some reason.
"Yeah but you know.. My family and friends are here." He says.
"Do you have a wife or kids or anything?" I now ask him because we haven't talked about those things yet.
"No." He says smiling. "I guess I still look for the perfect woman."
"She doesn't exist." I say.
"I believe the perfect woman for me is out there, I believe there's one true love for everybody and that our soulmate is out there somewhere, you just have to look for him or her." Jake says.
"That's deep." I say smiling. "I wonder if I've found mine yet."
"Don't you think that Marshall is the one?" Jake asks.
"Do you?" I ask him as I really don't know right now.
"It would explain why you were drawn to each other after so many years." He says. It now knocks on the door and I'm very surprised to see Marshall's face when he opens the door. He has a confused look on his face when he sees Jake siting here in his civil clothes, he looks over at the flowers and chocolate on the table and I can see right away that he just jumped to a conclusion.