Just the two of us (book 2)

Chapter 10 Visiting Rachel

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Today it's Wednesday and I haven't seen Marshall since Sunday, he has been busy with spending time with his girls meanwhile I've been so busy at the club and I also visited Lucas. Me and Marshall have been texting a lot and we arranged that today is gonna be the day where we visit Rachel. I've already informed Rachel that I'm coming and she got so happy, but I haven't told her that I'm bringing Marshall because I would rather have it being a surprise. Marshall picks me up at my hotel and seeing him makes the butterflies go insane, I get into the car and he immediately grabs me behind the neck and pulls me in for a kiss.
"I've missed you." He says. It's so strange that people sees him as this mean aggressive rapper and sure he can be like that in private too, but mostly he's a really sweet and caring guy.
"I've missed you too." I say and Marshall gives me the last kiss before he begins to drive.
"How are you feeling?" He then asks.
"Terrible.. I'm really nervous and mostly I just want you to turn this car around. but I know I have to get closure." I say.
"Have you been visiting Bugz yet?" He asks.
"Not yet, I was thinking that we could do that afterwards if you wanna go with me?" I ask.
"I would love to baby but I'm not sure if it's a good idea with the press and all." He says. Sometimes I really forget that he's a big celebrity now and we can't just go anywhere we want together.
"Sorry I seem to forget that all the time." I say with a smile.
"But let's see if you even have the energy for that when we're done at Rachel's." He says. He's right.. I have no idea how this turns out so I might not wanna do anything afterwards.
"You're right." I say.
On the way not many words are spoken because I'm so nervous and I think Marshall gave up trying to make a conversation, because my mind is elsewhere.
"Damn it looks the same." I say when we park outside the house.
"Are you ready for this?" Marshall asks.
"No but I'll never be if I don't do it now." I say.
"So you're ready to go in?" He asks and I shake my head.
"Not yet." I almost whisper. I feel sick just being out here because the only good memory I have in that house is my graduation and those nights I had in my room with Marshall. I begin to think about the day where it was one of those times where James was extra hard on me, actually it was a couple of days after my graduation and I can't even remember why he was angry, maybe he didn't tell me? A lot of times he just told me to shut up because I shouldn't question him.
"Do you remember after my graduation where we didn't see each other for like 2 weeks?" I ask him.
"Yeah I was tripping man and I actually thought you had lost your interest in me." He says.
"James beat me up pretty badly a couple of days after my graduation." I tell him. "Lucas was out with Nichole and he had send Rachel out doing some shopping which he knew would take long. He always did that shit because he knew that if I knew that I was gonna be alone with him, then I would make other plans." I say.
"What did he do?" He asks me. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to." He then adds.
"He came into my room and pulled my hair, threw me on the floor and he kicked me, he just kept on kicking me in the stomach and then he grabbed my hair and dragged me all the way down to his office, he ordered me to bend over his desk and pull my pants down... and my panties." I can barely say the last part because I remember how humiliated I felt. "When I refused to do it he took my head and smash it down onto the desk." I begin to cry.
"He did that?" He asks.
"Yes and when I pulled my pants and panties down he began to beat the backs of my thighs with a belt, I remember I could barely sit down for a week." I tell him.
"Yo that guy is a fucking masochist." He says angrily.
"I had bruises all over my stomach from his kicking and I had marks from the belt on the back of my thighs, I looked like someone who just had been in a car accident." I say.
"Did he use the belt a lot?" He asks me.
"Every time if he didn't use a cane." I say.
"A cane?!" He says and I can see the anger in his eyes and I nod my head. "I'm gonna fucking kill him."
"No Marshall! Don't do anything or else you ain't gonna come with me into the house." I say in a serious tone.
"Fine." He mumbles. I don't move because I have no idea what to say in there, I have no idea how to break it down especially with James being there, it's ridiculous that I'm still so afraid of him, it's like I'm
18 again and I am about to go home when knowing that I'm in trouble. What if Rachel doesn't believe me? I mean James can be very manipulative. My thoughts get interrupted when I feel Marshall hand on my thigh and I immediately look at him. "What are you thinking about?" He asks.
"I don't know how to break it especially with James being there." I say with a shaky voice. "I'm still so scared of him."
"Yo he can't touch you anymore and I'm not gonna allow him to." Marshall says.
"I know that deep down." I sigh and there's a moment of silence before I speak again "What if she doesn't believe me?"
"She saw him do it with her own eyes once besides Rachel will always believe in you, you're just talking crazy shit now because you're nervous babe." He says. Why is it that I'm doing this? I'm gonna ruin Rachel's life or even worse our relationship if things goes really bad in there.
"I can't do it Marshall." My voice cracks.
"I don't wanna push you into anything but you said yourself that you needed this." He says.
"But maybe Rachel doesn't need this." I say.
"She deserves to know what he did to you, she lives with a monster and she doesn't even know it." Marshall says. He's right, she deserves to know.
"Okay." I say and take a deep breathe. "Here we go." I say and get out of the car. I've never been so nervous in my whole life as now where I'm walking towards that door, it feels like about to open the gates to hell and I know that only evil exists in there.
I ring the doorbell and Rachel opens the door almost immediately, I can feel my eyes get watery because I've missed her so damn much, I don't say anything but I just hug her and then I see James walking up to us and I could run for my life right now.
"Hi honey." She laughs. "Omg you brought Marshall." She then says in a surprised voice and I let go of her so she can say hi to Marshall.
"Hello Rachel." He says and hug her.
"My god Marshall, I don't even have to ask how you're doing superstar." She says which makes Marshall laugh. I look at James who stands there and looks back at me.
"Hi Amelia, how are you doing?" He says in a sweet voice. Why the hell is he being so nice to me?!
"I'm good." I just say trying to control my voice which wants to shake, but I refuse to show him how scared I am right now. We all go in and take a seat at the dinner table, I can see that they ain't got much money now because it looks like shit in here, they never had a lot of money but I can see they've sold a lot of things.
"When did you regain contact?" Rachel asks us.
"A month ago when Marshall and the boys booked the VIP at my club." I tell her.
"So what about Kevin?" Rachel asks.
"He's doing really good." I say with a smile.
"Oh so.. You're still together?" She asks surprised. Oh.. She thinks that me and Marshall are a couple now?
"Yeah why wouldn't we be?" I ask her.
"I just thought.. Because.. You know.. You brought Marshall with you." She stutters.
"Me and Marshall are just friends." I say smiling.
"I think it's good that you can be friends considering your past." She says and I look at Marshall who looks right back at me with a smile. "So how is it going with your new club here in Detroit?" Rachel asks me.
"Good, it's going really well." I say. I'm a woman of very few words right now because I'm so nervous, I don't know how to break this with James staring at me all the time. It's been 8 years, maybe I should just drop it? Maybe he has changed? Can a monster like that change? I sit for a long time thinking about different ways to say what I came to say, but I can't figure out how.. I don't even listen to the conversation anymore I can just see Marshall and Rachel talking but I have no idea what they're talking about. Suddenly I see them all staring at me, why are they staring at me? Should I say something?
"Honey, is everything okay?" Rachel asks me. No..
"Yeah.. I just need to borrow the bathroom." I say in a low voice and I immediately go to the bathroom. I could throw up right not, my whole body is shaking and I'm sweating like fucking crazy! I'm not mentally ready for this and I can't deal with this, I need to get out of this house right now! I look at myself in the mirror and all I can see is myself 8 years ago, a broken girl living in hell and constantly afraid. Okay.. I need to go out there and tell her right now. I open the door and see James standing out on the hall, fuck..
"Why are you here Amelia?" He asks. I'm so scared that I can't move.
"I.. I just came by to visit." I stutter.
"I know why you're here and if you're thinking on doing what I think you about to do then you better think twice, because I'm positive that Kevin doesn't know how you sneak around with your old boyfriend." He says. I can't speak.. Where the fuck is Marshall when I need him? "Am I making myself clear Amelia? Remember what I'm capable of." He threatens and I just nod my head yes. "Now you go in there and tell Rachel that you don't feel very well and you need to leave and I will never see you in this house again, okay?" He says.
"Yes." My voice cracks. James leaves and I just stand there, I can't move.. I can't believe that he can still scare me that much. Tears begin to roll down my cheeks and I go back to the bathroom so I can get myself together. I don't know how long I'm in the bathroom but suddenly I hear a knock on the door.. What if it's James again?
"Amelia.." I hear Marshall voice. "Are you aright?" I can feel myself get angry, why the fuck didn't he come to check on me before?! "Open the door." I open the door and he comes out and joins me. "Why are you crying?" He asks and locks the door.
"Why the fuck did you first come out and check on me now?" I whisper yell.
"I thought you went out to pee." He says.
"So didn't you get suspicious when James left the table?" I ask him with disappointment written all over my face.
"What? He just went into the office to get some old magazines. Did he say something to you?" He asks.
"What do you think Marshall?" I ask him angrily.
"What did he say?" He asks.
"He knows why I am here and he wants me to leave now or else he's gonna tell Kevin about you." I tell him.
"You can't let him blackmail you like that." He says.
"I don't have much of a choice Marshall." I say.
"You can threaten him with the police." He says.
"He's friends with half of the station down there!" I whisper yell at him.
"I don't care, I have a lot of power too you know?" He says.
"No matter what, Kevin is gonna find out either way because James won't shut up if I don't leave now." I say.
"What if he hits her too, huh?" He asks. "We also talked about that shit when we were younger Amelia, what if she's just as scared as you are?" When I was younger I always thought that she couldn't hide it for me if he hit her but now I don't know. I could hide it from her so she could hide it from me too, right?
"Marshall my hands are tied." I tell him. I don't want this shit between me and Marshall to come out and that's not only because of Kevin but also because of all the media shit, nope I ain't gonna risk that.
"You gotta tell her." He says.
"No I gotta leave." I say in a serious tone.
"Fine if you ain't gonna tell her, I will." He says walking towards the door.
"Marshall if you tell her then I'm never gonna speak to you again." I say and he turns around to look at me.
"Do you love Rachel?" He asks.
"Of course I do." I say.
"Then you need to tell her which monster she's married to." He says. Ugh! I hate when he's right! I don't say anything because I know now that I can't run from this, I have to do this. "You know I'm right baby." Marshall then says walking towards me.
"I know." My voice cracks and Marshall kisses me.
"I'm gonna be right there and he can't do you any harm." He says. It really comforts me that Marshall is here because I know he's gonna protect me. I kiss Marshall and I get so caught up in the kiss, I'm somewhere else, someplace else when I feel his lips on mine and I can just escape. His tongue is dancing around mine while his hands are squeezing my hips.
"We gotta stop before I get hard or something." He whispers. Damn back to reality!
"Sorry." I say smiling.
"Come on we need to get out there." He says and we leave the bathroom. When we get to the kitchen I feel James' eyes on me immediately, I don't sit down neither does Marshall.
"Is everything alright dear?" She asks. "You've been crying."
"Actually.. I need to tell you something Rachel." I say with a shaky voice.
"What honey?" She asks. I can really feel James' eyes burn through me right now.
"The reason I haven't been visiting you is because James beat me when I was younger." I tell her and James starts to laugh, Rachel drops her jaw and looks at James meanwhile both me and Marshall look at James. Why is he laughing?
"You think it's funny?" Rachel asks him getting up from her chair.
"You haven't changed a bit Amelia." He says smiling. He really creeps me out right now.
"You beat her?!" Rachel now yells.
"Of course I didn't beat her Rachel, calm down." He says.
"Don't you fucking lie." Marshall now says.
"You've always fallen for her charm Marshall, she always had you exactly where she wanted you so of course she got you to believe in this too but she hates me, she has always hated me so that's why she makes up stories." James says in a clam tone.
"How dare you James? You just asked me to shut about this or you would tell Kevin about Marshall and I hanging out." I remind him.
"If I beat you up when you were younger then how come no one noticed? How come you didn't say something when you were younger?" He asks me. I can't believe that he's doing this right now!
"She doesn't need to show you any proves!" Marshall says angrily.
"James who are you trying to fool? I know Amelia wouldn't lie about this, I can see she's telling the truth." Rachel says and moves even further away from him. "For all these years you have blamed me for sending her to college, making me feel guilty for this shitty situation we're in and all along you hurt my little girl, my fucking everything!" I can see that Rachel is beyond angry now.
"I gave her discipline because she needed it Rachel!" He raises his voice. Omg first he denies and now he tries to justify it?
"This shows how much shit you're standing in, first you deny everything and now you're trying to justify your actions." Marshall says.
"I never beat her up, I disciplined her!" James raises his voice.
"So when you threw me on the floor and kicked me in the stomach repeatedly, that was just discipline?" I ask angrily. "Or when you forced me to drop my pants and my panties so you could spank me with whatever object who pleased you?" I ask him and I see Rachel's eyes widen and she gasps while she steps away from him.
"You're sick." She says and I can see her eyes get watery. James look at me with this extremely angry look and I won't lie, I'm so scared right now.
"Do you really believe her Rachel? She's a liar and you know it. We've been married for 20 years, you know me. Sure I've hit her a few times but I have never done those things. Are you gonna believe her? Right now she's sneaking around with her ex boyfriend and lying to her new boyfriend." He says.
"Amelia would never lie about this James. I told you if you ever laid a hand on her that I would divorce you!" She says. James now looks at me with this evil glare and I'm surprised that he hasn't hit me or anything yet.
"You're gonna pay for this." He tells me.
"Threaten her one more time James and I'll fuck you up." Marshall says angrily.
"It's not a threat it's a simply warning." He says.
"If you think about telling Kevin like you said you would then there's nothing to tell because me and Marshall are just friends." I say.
"Amelia and Marshall will you help me pack my things?" She asks and outta nowhere James grabs her throat.
"You think you can leave me when you're the reason we live like this?" He asks and Marshall pulls him away and throw him against the wall and hold him there by his throat.
"If you ever lay a hand on a woman again I swear to god you're fucking dead!" Marshall says angrily. "I have the money to get you killed and get away with it, don't you ever forget that you fucking punk!" He says.
"Rachel let's pack your things." I say and my voice is shaken. Me and Rachel go into the bedroom to pack her clothes and she breaks down crying.
"I'm so sorry Amelia." She cries.
"Rachel you didn't know." I say.
"Why didn't you tell me sweetie?" She cries.
"I was too scared." I admit. "No one knew besides Tasha." I say.
"Not even Marshall?" She asks.
"No he would have lost it at James." I say.
"Marshall showed up here everyday for 2 months after you left, he was crying and begging me to tell him where you were." She tells me. I didn't know that.. Why haven't Marshall told me? It's like everyday I feel more guilty for leaving him like that.
"I wish I could have told him." I just say.
"I wish you would have told us all." She cries. "I've spend 23 years with a monster."
"I'm sorry." I cry feeling bad. If I've told her then she wouldn't have waisted the last almost 10 years on him.
"Don't apologize honey. I should have left him a long time ago anyways." She sighs.
"How come you say that?" I ask.
"Because he has been a horrible husband the past 8 years." She says.
"Has he ever hit you?" I now ask her the question I've been wanted to ask her for a long time.
"It has happened a couple of times." She sighs.
"How come you've never told me?" I ask. If I just knew that 8 years ago..
"Because I didn't think it was a big deal." She says.
"Did he hit you like he hit me?" I ask and she shakes her head no.
"He has just slapped me around a couple of times." She says.
Me and Rachel pack her things and then head out to Marshall and James again, James and Marshall stands in each corner of the kitchen and look at each other, they don't say anything.
"Are you ready?" Marshall asks us and we just nod our heads.
"Btw Rachel remember to tell Amelia that it was her old man who paid for her college." James says with a smile and my eyes widens as I look at Rachel, she looks at James with this evil glare and now I know it's true.
"You're such an asshole James." She says as we leave the house.